scomiche one-shots

.7.

shown above is the only cute pic of me there is. i was watching home videos with fam today and i couldn't stop smiling when my chubby face came up. made me feel so content and smiley. i was about 2 in that pic. aren't i cute?

Hi. It's Emma(ett).

I seriously don't know what to call myself anymore, so I'm gonna just do that for now.

ANYWAYS

How've you lovely people been doing?

I'm doing alright.

I think I might tell my real friends about my confusion at school tomorrow.

I'm so nervous.

I know they'll support me, but I just don't know what they're gonna say.

Some friends... I don't know if they'll support me or not.

Cause I have my normal group of best friends that I've hung out with for all of my life, and all of them are gay af. Like seriously, 3 pans, 1 lesbian, and 1 bi (me). 

But then I have my best friends that my normal group doesn't talk to. Those friends are completely different but we're still friends.

I'm worried how people will treat me. 

Will they think of me differently? 

Will they stop talking to me?

Will people start making fun of me?

Will everything go downhill? 

Shit, I'm thinking too much again.

But of course once I start, I never stop.

Like I don't feel like both or neither.

But I feel like a boy most of the time, sometimes I feel like a girl. I never feel like neither or both. I don't want they/them pronouns. Ugh, I'm so confused. Does anyone have help or suggestions of what I might be? 

I've never been this confused in my whole life.

So many things could go wrong if Emmett turns out to be me.

I could lose my close friends.

People would think different of me. 

My parents might not accept me. (like 88% sure they won't)

What if I regret everything?

People could start bullying me. (99% sure they will cause my school sucks)

I just want people to support me and love me as much as they do now. 

I'm so fucking scared.

What if people hate me?

Don't support me?

Lose all of my friends?

I just want people to accept me for me. I'm so scared just thinking about my friend's faces once I tell them. 

I know I'm not completely sure of who I am, but Emmett is kind of calling my name.

I DONT FUCKING KNOW AND I WANT TO KNOW.

But maybe I do feel both?

UGH IM SO CONFUSED.

Whatever, I should just go to sleep.

Thank you guys for always supporting and accepting me.

I love all of you.

Wish me luck.

-Emma(ett) "aka" scomichequeen.

<3.