Forever To Be Loved

Chapter Eighteen

Heeeyyy Guys! Lol, I'm so sorry. I know a couple of you are mad at me, but hey, take that anger out on the vote button. Just Playing!!

It’s been about three days since the whole Aiden biting me thing. I know that it was an accident, but he still feels bad about what he’d done. No matter how many times I told him that it was an mistake and that I already forgiven him, he wouldn’t hear it.

    Another thing that Aiden is upset about is me not letting him come to my chemo appointments at the hospital. It made me feel bad, but that wasn’t something I was going to allow him to see. The only people I let come was either my mom, Jasmine or Rhianan. I didn’t even want them coming with me. The only reason I allowed it was because I couldn’t do this alone. Also, they never cried, so that helped me from doing what I really wanted to do; which was to curl up into a ball and cry. I wasn’t going to feel sorry about myself though, because there was at least a hundred different patients in here, going through the exact same thing that I was.

    Rhianan was strong though. She never cried, and she kept me talking through the whole process. Jasmine never cried either, but my Mom was the one who broke down occasionally. I didn’t blame her for it though because she was a mother, and I understood her need to cry for her daughter.

    I never went outside anymore either. I was so tired of the looks and the stupid questions that people asked, like they didn’t know the obvious. I had cancer. Though that wasn’t the only reason I didn’t go out anymore. The medicine made me so tired and lazy that the only thing I could do was go to chemo, come home, eat a light snack (because I haven’t had much of an appetite lately), take a nap, wake up eat dinner, and do it all over again.

    There have been days where I felt in the mood to go out, and when I did I was either with Rhianan, Robert, Jasmine and Daniel, Aiden, or we all hung out together. We all became friends and Aiden fit right in with all of us.

    I was happy, despite the sadness in my life.

“Do you need me to call the nurse?” Rhianan asked, holding onto my hair with one hand and placing a wet cloth onto the back of my neck with the other as my stomach rolled and I heaved once again, but nothing came up.

“No,” I say wiping my mouth off with a napkin and taking a drink of water before spitting it out into the waste bucket. “I’m okay now. I think it’s over,” I lean back into the chair, closing my eyes.

“Sah’nai, when does this stop?” Rhianan asked, her voice quiet.

I looked over from my spot in the chair next to hers. “When does what stop?” I asked my voice weak.

“This chemo?” she asked. “How much longer does it last?”

“Tomorrow’s the last day, and then its three weeks of remission before I can get the transplant.”

“And in those three weeks, what’s supposed to happen? Will you get better or worse?”

“I’m not really sure, but Dr. Moore said the cancer is not getting worse, but that it may be getting better. There might be occasional symptoms here and there.”

“So that’s good?”

“Of course,” I say rubbing my forehead, feeling a headache coming on.

“What did Aiden say?”

“I don’t let him talk about it.”

“What? Why not?”

“Because I already know what he has to say, and I didn’t want to think about that anytime soon.”