Summary: Zayn’s feeling for Liam never faltered, it was still there, waiting and wishing there would come a time where he’d see him again and explain to him how big his mistake was for leaving him.
By: Theallegoryofzayn.tumblr.com
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Zayn had reached the peak of his dreams. He always loved drawing comics, and when his talent was discovered, Captain Zap Comics was born. It was something Zayn didn’t really expect to make it out alive from all those other comic books he’s competing to, but something in his work convinced a lot of people he could. And he did. The first release of his issue topped the best-selling comics of that time, and Zayn almost felt like he wanted to be contented with that.
But then more people wanted to publicize his work and the Captain Zap mania spread out like disease in every country. His works were printed in every little thing imaginable; he was invited in comic conventions, and did small talks and tutorials in every country his comic was released. To top it all off, Zayn was given his own flat in New York while he works for the next issue and for his work to be animated and even brought into the big screen.
It all happened too fast Zayn didn’t feel the five years that has gone by and yet, he always feels this emptiness inside him – this feeling that no matter what he reached or achieved, there’s still a part of him that’s looking for something, for someone. And even if those years have passed, Zayn’s feeling for Liam never faltered, it was still there, waiting and wishing there would come a time where he’d see him again and explain to him how big his mistake was for leaving him.
Zayn admitted he was afraid – afraid that this love Liam gave to him was just because of his brother, and not because of what he showed. He was afraid of what will happen next if Leo would die, and Liam was with him, and he would be thinking of following his brother rather than staying with him. What if his love for Liam would never be enough?
And so he ran away and it was the worst thing he ever did because when he came back with his decision, so was Liam – it was to leave him. Zayn was wrong about everything all along and it hurt him even more, hearing those words of hate, of disgust coming right out of Liam’s mouth. All along he loved him, not because of Leo, but because he was Zayn – and Zayn wished he could’ve just thought of the same thing and didn’t let Liam walk away without him.
Five years, he tried. He tried to tell himself, maybe he and Liam were not meant to be, and that their meeting at that bookstore was a mere coincidence and not some destiny they both believed into, something he made Liam believed. But all those days without Liam’s smile, without his touch, without hearing his voice were unbearable and all those tears never stopped from falling. Everything he had was nothing compared to what he felt when he’s with Liam and he was determined to give it all up, just to take him back.
Without a certain plan of forgiveness or words to say, Zayn packed his bags, wrote a letter of apology to his publisher and went on a plane back to where they meet. If he was on the top of the mountain, basking into his long life dream, Zayn was ready to slide all the way down to the bottom.
He imagined Liam’s face of bitterness, but it was okay, because he’d explain and even if Liam would want to beat him until he won’t be able to stand up anymore, it was still okay, because he was Liam and Zayn loved every bit of him, and he’s to prove to him that he did, he always did. And even if Liam would push him away, Zayn won’t stop on chasing him.
“Are you looking for someone?” An old man approached Zayn, standing in front of the door in the longest time possible, not hearing anything from inside, and not seeing any sign of Liam walking his way to the door. Zayn nodded and the old man shook his head and for a minute, Zayn wished it wasn’t what he thought it was. “The fine lad who lived there left the room five years ago right after his younger brother died.”
