𝐛𝐨𝐫𝐧 𝐭𝐨 𝐛𝐞 𝐦𝐲 𝐛𝐚𝐛𝐲 | jon bon jovi

Chapter 71

"I know when I die, you'll be on my mind."

I was back at my apartment the next day, packing up all the baby stuff I had bought. I had to keep myself busy, so I could avoid just crying all the time. 

I felt so vulnerable. Packing up all of Jons' things and the babys. 

If someone told me a month from now, how much pain I would be in, I would think they were insane. 

But I truly felt broken. 

The people I loved were gone. 

I wondered how Jon took the news. 

I refused to call him, so Missy took care of it. 

The phone started to ring and I picked it up, "I'm outside, I'm taking you out to eat." said Missy. 

"Okay." was all I could say. 

I walked out to the car and Missy hugged me. 

"I'm here to distract you." she said. 

"Missy you have a whole wedding to plan. You don't have to this, I'm okay by myself." I replied. 

"The wedding can wait. All I care about is you right now. So where do you wanna eat"? She said sternly. 

"Well I could really go for a breakfast sandwich at the corner cafe." I replied. 

"That sounds so good right now." Laughed Missy.

We sat down at a table outside and it was nice to feel the breeze. 

"How did Jon take the news"? I asked. 

Missy looked up at me, "He's very upset. But you don't worry about him. He's a cheating douche bag." she said. 

"Was he crying"? I asked ignoring what she said. 

"He was very emotional about it. I'm not gonna tell you anything else, okay? You don't need to be thinking about that." She said as she took a sip of her water. 

I looked at the menu, "You know what"? 

"What"? Missy asked. 

"I can drink again." I smirked. 

"Well a fruity margarita doesn't sound too bad right now."  smiled Missy. 

" It's been months, anything sounds good at this point." I laughed. 

We finished eating at the cafe before crossing the street to go to a bar.

The bartender looked me up and down "You're pregnant, you cannot be drinking." 

Missy cut in, "She's not pregnant." She leaned in so that only the bartender could hear her, but I still heard, "She lost her kid and all she wants to do is have a drink."

The bartender looked at me sadly, "Anything you want, it's on the house." 

"I just want a margarita. I don't want to get drunk." I told the bartender and Missy. 

"Well I guess I won't get drunk either." she said as she sat down next to me. 

I was peacefully drinking when and old lady came up to me. 

"Drinking while pregnant." she said disapprovingly. 

I didn't even have to defend myself. Missy and the bartender started going off on her and I just watched. 

After getting like the 10th comment about drinking while pregnant, I just told Missy to take me home. 

"I'm sorry people are nosy idiots." she said as we pulled up to my apartment. 

"Its okay. I really appreciate you doing this." I said with a smile. 

"Of course, anything for you." She smiled in return. 

"I'll call you later." I said and I went back to my apartment. 

As soon as I was walked in, I was greeted with the packed up boxes. 

I took a deep breathe of sadness.

It was nice to pretend for a few hours like everything was still okay, but at the end of the day I still have to sit here alone with my sad thoughts. 

I pulled my hair back into braids and changed into some shorts and a baggy t-shirt. 

I needed to finish getting rid of everything once and for all. 

It was a few hours later and I had finally finished. 

I have to admit that I was crying between those few hours. 

I sat down on the couch only for there to be pounding on my door. 

I opened the door and there stood Jon. 

His eyes were full of tears. 

"Jon I-."  I started. 

He wrapped me in a tight hug, "Shh Jackie I know." He said with a sad voice.

I hugged him back and cried into his shoulder. 

He rubbed my back and I could feel his tears on my neck. 

I pulled out of the hug and wiped some tears off his face "I'm sorry Missy had to tell you, I just couldn't." 

Jon nodded, "It's okay Jackie. I'm not mad at you." He said squeezing my hand. 

I shook my head as tears fell down my face "I use to be able to feel the baby in my stomach and now that its gone, I just feel so empty." I said trying to justify my tears. 

Jon's hand met my stomach "You would have been an amazing mother Jackie." He said as a tear rolled down his face.

I hugged him again "You too Jon. I'm sorry for all those mean things I said about taking the baby away from you." 

Jon shushed me "Don't worry about that. I just wanna be here for you. To comfort you. And i'm hoping that you can keep me company as well." 

I held my head "Jon, I just don't think we should be together, if you have someone back at home waiting for you." 

Jon shook his head, "I fired Krista. She's gone and out of my life." 

I nodded "Okay. I guess you can stay the night." 

He climbed into the bed with me and just held me as we both cried.