102 - m.h

// 14. love me //

a week had already past since our graduation, and so far, we were spending our freedom by hanging out a lot — especially gabby and i.

and through the 6 months we've known each other, our connection went so much deeper.

i was open about anything and everything to her, — well, not exactly 'everything' if you know what i mean —.

she was like a manger at times, but also a quiet one, oh and also, if you're wondering if amanda still was enraged with me, — the answer is not anymore.

she apologized for saying stuff to people about me; bad things to be exact.

i was sod off at ger at first because she doesn't seem to acknowledge her wrong doings — making people think that i was so chuffed about dumping her with many people around — but glad she did.

i crumpled the bog roll i was holding because my coffee just got knocked off, by me obviously.

i was so busy writing and my elbow accidentally hit the cup off the table and spilled on the floor.

what a big tosser, aren't i?

'm a bit clumsy at times, and i hate that. even though 'm trying my very best at being careful, disaster's seems to find and hunt me.

i almost lost the plot, i spilled water on my paper the other day that contains the lyrics i made for a song written in black ink.

it was soaking wet that the ink started to fade.

in the end, i couldn't saved the song or i thought i couldn't. rest in peace.

but i sorted it out and got it re-written, but some revisions were made due to me forgetting majority of the contents.

it had a happy ending, i did saved it afterall.

my mum was busy in her room, probably erm, watching films. it was her day off, and it's her time to rest.

so mostly, i did the chores, because how could she rest in her supposed 'rest' day if she's gonna do loads of exhausting works all day?

i was excited for today, because i have the freedom to maybe write music, but mostlt because i'm gonna slunk tonight with gabby.

it became traditional, it's like sneaking out of the house at night to have a date with your love interest.

which is almost true, i sneak out with my love interest but not technically for a date.

which caused anguish in my heart again, i knew she liked george so why bother sneak out with me every night when she could do that with him?

i don't quite get it.

was she dithering? or was she deliberately, going out with me most of the times so that george will get sort of jealous, or maybe to see her chance?

i knew my heart could be broken at the end but i was not guarding my heart. as if i took off the buffer, and decided that i'm willing to get hurt.

if the only way i could be with her is through sneaking around at night with nobody knowing, but only me and her, and it'll break me, 'm more than ready to risk it all.

she's worth the risk honestly, she was everything a man could ask for, it's like she came from a fiction book.

she was written so perfectly, uniquely and exquisitely.

i have to thank the god and godesses for making her, it was like they thought it through clearly while making her.

if i was in a room full of art, i would look at her as she is the most beautiful piece of art there could be.