I'll Be On My Back The Rest Of The Night

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*Wanda walks in*
Wanda- Tony wait! I- Umm I'm not ready.. just wait please..
*Wanda leaves and you hear the car start*
Y/N- Wait is she- *You look out the window* she's leaving!
Nat- she will be back.. she just needs some time. She wanted this for so long and she's trying to curb her expectations..
Steve- Did she tell you that?
*Nat nods*

*Bucky stands up*
Bucky- well since we have time.. thunder dome! Lightning round.. first one to get hit wins and is obviously the better and bigger man..
Steve- well then just give me the title..
*Bucky stands right in front of Steve.. Nat whisper screams*
Nat- kiss kiss kiss!
*You laugh and elbow Nat*
Bucky- oh Stevie, I think you keep forgetting that I got the serum too.. which means what happened to you *Bucky holds up a measurement and then moves his hands farther apart* also happened to me... but I had more to begin with.. *He moves his hands even farther*
*You and Nat cover your mouths as to not laugh and scream*
Steve- It's on!!

*Steve and Bucky run in opposite directions.. each pulling out a hidden nerf gun*
Y/N- Where did you-
Bucky- you know I'm always prepared baby!
*Steve teases*
Steve- Really?!? Then why are you always bumming condoms off me?! When you obviously don't use them! *He point to your belly*
*Steve shoots at Bucky.. Bucky ducks*
Bucky- Don't bring my babies into this!
*Nat sits next to you*
Nat- Oh boys.. *You laugh* hey did Bucky ask you about who's bigger?
Y/N- Yep! Did Steve?
Nat- Yup!
*You both laugh*
Nat- But I'm pretty sure he still doesn't believe me..
Y/N- Yeah.. I can tell Bucky is still curious..
*You and Nat look at each other and laugh*
*Bucky comes flying over the couch and hides*
Bucky- Where is he?!? Do you see him??
Y/N- No, you're good baby..
*Bucky sits up and Steve comes out of nowhere nails Bucky in the head*
Steve- I win! *Bucky tosses his gun on the couch and you reach for his arm* admit it! I'm better-
Bucky- Nope-
Steve- That was the deal-
Bucky- No, I'm twice the man-
Steve- you-
*You and Nat have had enough*
Y/N- stop!!
Nat- This is crazy!
Y/N- it doesn't matter "who the bigger man is"
Bucky- air quotes?
Steve- air quotes are kinda hurtful

*You and Nat roll your eyes and then have the same idea... you pull her to the side*
Y/N- You thinking what I'm thinking...
Nat- Oh yeah.. teach me a lesson..
*You turn back around*
Y/N- only one way to settle this..
*You look at Nat. She smirks*
Nat- Drop em!
*Steve and Bucky gets wide eyes and laugh. They play it off*
Steve- Ha! Okay..
Bucky- we're not..
Y/N- Nope! I'm tired of this.. the only way to settle this is to drop your pants and see for yourselves!
*Steve and Bucky look at each other and laugh they pat each other on the back.. then Bucky walks away*
Nat- Good one.. although I had kinda hoped they'd actually go through with it..
*You laugh*
Y/N- Oh Nat... I know my husband so well.. in fact he's gone to get a tape measure..
Nat- No way..
*Bucky comes walking back in with a tape measure and a sharpie.. he throws it at Steve*
Bucky- you first..
*Steve stands up*
*Nat turns to you.. completely shocked*
Nat- How did you know?!?
*You smile and shrug.. Nat laughs. Steve is about to leave when Nat stops him*
Nat- Okay look this is ridiculous.. there is no reason to fight about who's dick is bigger! All that matters is that I think you're the best Steve!
*Bucky and Steve smile and chuckle*
Steve- I know baby.. and we're good now... I'm just curious..
Bucky- yeah.. we were fine before I got the tape measure.. I'm just curious too..
*They both laugh and Steve walks out real quick*
Nat- Oh my god..
*Steve walks back in with a piece of paper marked.. Bucky walks out and marks his on a different piece of paper.. he lays it down on the table... you and Nat pick up the papers and "examine" them*
Nat- See same-
Y/N- well.. not completely..
Nat- true Bucky's a little-
Y/N- yeah-
*Steve and Bucky look at each other and size each other up... you and Nat smile*
Y/N- see for yourselves.. the same
Nat- But still different.. Steve's an inch longer
Y/N- Bucky's and inch wider
*They look at each other and nod.. they then shake hands and pat each other on the back*
Y/N- So weird... *You clear your throat" since this ridiculousness is over.. *You smirk and start to walk away*
Bucky- oh! *Bucky smiles and slaps Steve's shoulder* duty calls..
Steve- Where's your son??
Bucky- Peter's got him..
*Peter walks in*
Peter- Who do I have?? *He picks up the two papers* what's up with these two papers with 5 inch long lines on them??
*You and Nat bust out laughing.. Steve and Bucky start to freak out*
Steve- Way more than 5 inches
Bucky- I thought you were good at math and stuff
Steve- insulted
Bucky- it's 8
Steve- And that's not even ready to go..
Bucky- yeah, 9 at attention
*Peter looks between them and the realizes what they are talking about*
Peter- Eww! Wait- 9?!? What?!? That's not- wait, did the serum?? That awesome!! I need it..
Y/N- Peter... please go watch Grant and I'll pay you $30..
Peter- Okay... hey Umm does the serum-
Bucky- Peter, go!
*Steve and Bucky crumple up that papers*
Steve- 5 inches..
Bucky- disrespectful..
*You and Nat can see that Peter just deflated Steve and Bucky without trying... you smile and you take Bucky by the hand*
Y/N- come on.. *You whisper* I need my White Wolf.. my 9 inch, Thicc boy.. *You wink and Bucky smiles*
*Nat takes Steve's arm and whispers*
Nat- Come on Captain.. teach me a lesson..
*Steve smiles and kisses Nat*

*They boys walk ahead of you and Nat.. you and Nat look at each other*
Y/N- What would they do without us??
Nat- Ha! I have no Idea... most definitely kill Peter..
Y/N- Ha! True!! Man...
*You look at Bucky as he walks in your room and Nat watches Steve*
Y/N- he's gonna totally wreck me to "prove himself" because of Peter's comment..
Nat- yeah... I won't be walking to the dinner table
Tonight.. *You laugh and agree*
Y/N- man I actually had some work I needed to do but now... *You motion to the door... Nat laughs*
Nat- I needed to get some stuff for Sarah but now it looks like I'll be on my back for the rest of the night..
Y/N- Ha! Same, or at least as long as Winnie will let me.. *Nat looks at you* oh yeah.. just wait.. kids aren't just cockblocks outside the womb.. they start when their inside..
*Nat whines and you push her towards her room.. you walk in yours and you see Bucky standing in front of the mirror, his pants are around his ankles.. you shake your head and smile*
Y/N- Making sure it's still there after what Peter said?
*He turns around and shakes his head.. he motions to his dick*
Bucky- 5 inches my ass!
*You laugh and Bucky kicks off his pants and takes off his shirt.. he runs at you and you giggle*
Y/N- Wow starting sex with you completely naked.. that's new!!
*Bucky smiles and kisses you*
Bucky- Just switching it up baby! Now pup, are you gonna be good??

‼️I was not emotional ready to write the Wanda storyline yet so that's why I had her leave.... She'll be back soon! 🥰🥰‼️

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