Take My Hand - Lashton

Chapter Thirty-nine

Chapter Thirty-nine

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It was bliss. Pure bliss. Luke had never felt so calm in all his life. He was laying on Ashton's bare chest, his ear resting on his heart. Luke could hear it thumping, beating for him. Luke had never felt like this before. He wondered if this was the tranquillity that true love provided.

When he first laid with Ashton a decade ago he thought it was love. But it was fake. Or maybe forced was a better word. He wanted to love Ashton and Ashton wanted to love him — but they weren't ready yet. But both men could tell they were ready now. They were here together on top of each other and nothing could separate them. Stella wanted it just as much as they and Luke didn't care anymore what Aaron thought. He was finally free.

Luke had skipped the event. The duo had walked hand in hand, like a proper couple with no secrets around the city. They had gotten coffee and went into museums. And now after an afternoon full of adventure and love they were tired. They had a table booked for eight but they wanted to lay and rest together beforehand.

Luke's phone had buzzed on the bedside table and Luke wondered if he should answer it. If he should lay another false trail. Tell Ashton to keep quiet whilst he lies to him. But Luke couldn't do that. He didn't want Ashton to watch him lie and scheme — he was afraid it would put him off. Two hundred miles away from Aaron he felt his head felt cleansed. He could now see clearly that what he had done wasn't normal, that really he could have just left. While Aaron was at work he could have run away somewhere unknown. But at the same time, he knew he couldn't; he had to tie up everything neatly. So he turned off his phone and hoped that Aaron didn't drive all the way up to Leeds and find his hotel room, he did have the booking details after all. He paid for his boyfriend to be laying with someone else.

Ashton could tell Luke's mind was running wild. He was relaxed but Ashton knew that Luke's mind would never truly be silent. He ran his finger over Luke's bareback, over the bruises and scars. "All those marks Luke they're all so fresh. Did he do them all? Stella told me that you've been hurting yourself?"

Luke kept his head down for a while then looked up at Ashton teary-eyed. He worried that Ashton was going to judge him for what he had done. "It's the only thing I had Ashton. The only power I had left— until this—" he explained with desperation.

Ashton just sighed. He understood. He had seen his patients do crazy things for power. Sometimes they ended up doing things worse than their abuser. But that's what years of violence and desperation did to people. "Did I not tell you someone would hurt you all those years ago. People like him thrive off the vulnerable. And it boosts their ego, even more, when it's vulnerable men. Two for the price of one."

Luke laughed. He recalled the exact words Ashton had said. He didn't understand them at the time, but he understood now. Luke thought about why he fell victim, why he didn't realise."When we first met he complimented my body. Told me he loved how small I was. And then he apologised and said it was wrong of him to say that, in case I got triggered or anything."

"And did you?"

Luke shook his head. "I was pretty strong then. I was clubbing for one!"

Ashton hummed, wanting to know that Luke. "And what did you say." Ashton couldn't help it. The short question came firing out of him as if he were at work. He was trying to help and protect Luke as he did a decade ago, but now he understood how it worked. How to tackle helping someone he loved.

"I told him I didn't mind and it was a good job I didn't meet him five years ago. Then we got talking about it all. Deep shit for a club!"

"He found his prey. I bet he'd been watching men for days, trying to find someone."

Luke stared up at the ceiling and thought for a while. He then made a noise of realisation. "I was there alone. Well, I went with friends but clubs aren't really my scene. I guess that because I was alone he saw some sort of weakness in me. And I was dancing, well barely moving and I kept making eye contact with him. And I was drunk but thrilled that someone was paying attention to me."

Ashton understood. He understood both what Luke and Aaron were thinking the moment they first met. It was a perverse way of putting it, but they were a perfect match for each other. Meeting Luke again, Ashton knew he shifted something in Luke that sent their relationship off balance. "I'm really glad we met again Luke."

"I thought about you a lot. I knew you were in London and I would always scan the streets to see if I could catch a glimpse of you."

Ashton pulled Luke closer to him and kissed him passionately. When he pulled away he whispered. "And here we are, finally together again." He wanted to add forever but Ashton didn't know what was going to happen after they returned back home.

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Thought I'd update this early because I have a busy day tomorrow!

Short but sweet! And I can't believe that there are only about twenty chapters left!

Thank you so much for reading.