Take My Hand - Lashton

Chapter Forty-eight

Chapter Forty-eight

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Slamming the door behind him with a sigh of relief, Ashton threw his bag on the sofa and made his way through the flat trying to find his boyfriend. All he wanted was a big hug to relieve all the stress the day had piled upon him. Not sitting on the couch, that meant the only other place he would be found was in the small room where he kept his desk.

The door was open and the blonde man was staring at his computer. Ashton didn't know if he had heard the door slam and spoke up, "All I do is go to doctors appointments, people would think I'm the one who is sick—"

Luke spun around in his chair, his eyes tired from staring at the screen for so long. He understood what Ashton meant, wondering how tired the older man actually was. He never complained, and if he did it was usually as a joke. But, over the past months, he had been splitting his time between going to doctors appointments with Stella for the baby and joint therapy sessions with Luke to help their relationship.

It was Luke's idea and at first, Ashton didn't like it. He knew how much Luke wanted him to talk to someone, just like Ashton had wanted Luke. He knew it would have been hypocritical of him to refuse. Instead of going alone, Ashton suggested he tag along to one of Luke's a week. They did help — he knew they would. He wasn't a therapist just for the job, he did it because he knew it worked! The one hour a week opened his eyes to Luke's world, he saw it more clearly.

His mind went flooding back to the half a dozen sessions he'd attended. Luke's therapist didn't specialise in anything particular. Ashton didn't like that to begin with, but now he understood why Luke had chosen to just go to someone who could connect all his problems together. Not only had they talked about the power dynamic in the relationship and Aaron, but they also discussed his eating habits. Ashton had recognised an improvement in both and he decided to just let Luke get on with what he wanted to do.

Ashton smiled lovingly at Luke who slouched in his chair. Ashton himself leaned against the door frame. "Have you eaten?" he asked. The question had been one he felt more comfortable asking now. Luke knew it wasn't a confrontation, it was just a question that people asked. It was an invitation for them to eat together. And while the pair often had different meals, Luke not ready for Ashton to decide what he ate, he now had no problem with Ashton choosing the time.

Luke shook his head and then squinted his eyes trying to think. "I haven't eaten since breakfast. I haven't really moved — I was just writing—"

Ashton knew what Luke meant. Luke was busy and sometimes it was easy to forget. He'd done it countless times over the past couple of weeks. It was in no way a healthy life choice, but society often enforced work over health. Nervously Ashton asked, "Would you like me to make something?"

"Sure. I'll be out in a minute." Luke didn't even think about it. Ashton had been thinking about it, and itching to ask the question for a couple of days now. He longed for the day he could eat with his boyfriend and they could discuss how their food tasted. He wanted to show off his cooking skills and for Luke to compliment them. He had researched countless vegan meals (some that he would like too) to cook just for him. And finally, they had reached a new milestone in their relationship.

-

"Do you think maybe this could be something we start now?" Luke asked leaning in to take the last pizza slice, smiling at Ashton. Ashton actually couldn't be bothered to cook so he ordered a pizza. He just got the one, not wanting to push Luke too far. Eating wasn't something he was scared of anymore, it was more so the atmosphere in the relationship that could be provoked by such an action. Nonetheless, Ashton still thought little steps were better.

"What do you mean?" Ashton checked

"You cook for me? I think it's something I can handle," Luke said. "And it's tiring cooking for myself every day! We could take it in turns?"

"I'd like that too. It feels odd eating apart. But if you want to stop it at any time, tell me okay?"

Luke nodded and placed the empty box on the table. He then climbed onto Ashton's lap. He wrapped his arms around Ashton's body and continued to smile. "This reminds me of when I went to get pizza with you when we were younger," he said softly.

Ashton nodded. The exact memory lingering in his mind. "Except now you won't let go of me and before you refused to come within a mile of me!"

Luke laughed and looked down at his lap. "I was never very good at communicating my feelings. You made me very nervous!"

Ashton placed his finger under his chin and lifted it up. "Do I still make you nervous?"

Luke blushed and shook his head. "I think—" he began then stopped to rethink his words. "I think you are the only person I truly feel I can be myself around."

-

My brain cannot think of anything to say today but I hope you enjoyed this!

I hope everyone has a good week as well!

Thank you so much for reading!