Take My Hand - Lashton

Chapter Forty-six

Chapter Forty-six

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It had been four weeks since Luke had last seen Aaron, and two weeks of falling asleep in Ashton's arms every night — and occasionally day!

Ashton went to work every day but weekends, returning home just after six where he would determine whether Luke wanted to read alone or read cuddled up together. Sometimes Luke would interrupt Ashton who was watching a film on his phone, pulling out his headphones and reading passages aloud that he liked. It made his heart swell, it reminded him of when they were younger.

Everything was working out quite well. Sometimes Ashton got upset, and other times Luke did. It was balanced. Luke would yell at Ashton for always creeping around him, especially after therapy, wanting to draw information out of him about how he was doing. They would argue about how they wanted to live their lives together, ignore each other for a couple of hours and then when it was nearing midnight Ashton would get into bed with Luke and all the turmoil would be forgotten. Space and solitude were all it took.

It was Sunday. Ashton didn't work on Sundays and Luke tried not to. Ashton had decided they ought to go for a walk to stop his gravitating towards his desk and Luke agreed.

Luke smiled at Ashton as he dragged him over to an empty bench. "You tired?" Ashton asked as he obediently let Luke's force take him wherever he wanted to go. Their fingers intertwined, and gripped tightly together, Ashton had followed Luke's directions without care. If Luke pulled him over to the left to avoid bicycles he followed or if he slowed, Ashton slowed.

Luke shook his head but Ashton didn't notice. "Just want to take in the surroundings. People watch and stuff—"

Ashton hummed suspiciously as he sat beside his boyfriend. The bench was slightly damp, and cold, which explained why it was vacant. Neither of the men cared. Luke snuggled into Ashton's coat and rested his head on his shoulder. It was mid-winter. The roads were icy a couple of hours ago but it was now midday. The sun was as high as it could go and was barely radiating any heat.

"Are you looking for anyone in particular?" Ashton asked. Their hands were no longer linked together. Ashton took the opportunity to shove them in his pockets, forgetting to bring gloves.

Luke couldn't help but laugh and rolled his eyes. "Do you mean Aaron?" The name came out in a mocking tone, a puff of smoke escaping Luke's lips.

Ashton turned to look at Luke and nodded. "It's okay if you are," Ashton accepted. "I keep looking to see if he is hiding in the trees!"

Luke shook his head, his hair creating noise against Ashton's coat. "No. I feel safe here," he said. "Aaron didn't do parks anyway, he had a lot of allergies."

They didn't speak for a while. Ashton kept his head in a position so he could see Luke. He watched the blonde man observe the people that walked by, his eyes scanning back and forth. Sometimes his lips curled upwards if he saw a person walk by he liked or a dog he found amusing. Sometimes he would flinch when a pigeon would rapidly fly away. Such natural responses made Ashton content. He found it reassuring that Luke was responding so natural to the everyday world, wasn't rushing to hide inside.

"What do you want to do tonight?" Luke asked, lifting his head up slightly so they were now making eye contact.

Ashton reached down and kissed Luke's lips. Luke smiled. "I don't know, do you have an idea?" Ashton said, his heart racing.

"I don't know. I'd quite like to go to the cinema," Luke admitted shyly. "We haven't been on a date yet," he added.

"A spontaneous cinema date," Ashton pondered. "I like the sound of that. Any film you want to watch?"

Luke shrugged. "I don't know what's on. But if it's spontaneous then we better let someone else choose—"

"A random and unplanned date with you, I'd never thought it would happen!" Ashton laughed.

Luke blushed. "They mean more if they're unplanned. I quite like it! But I think I only like it because it's with you!"

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Just a cute and short chapter!

I thought I'd take a minute to talk about the Isreal and Palestine conflict. I know it's quite easy to skim past this on the news because you don't know much about it and the Middle East might seem so far away but there is so much history into the conflict that it is really important to read into it. I first learnt of Palestine four years ago! Imagine going most of your life knowing nothing about a place! I was asked to represent Palestine in MUN. After that, I thought a lot about the place and tried to make sure I was aware of most places in the world.

Then two weeks ago while I was doing some revision on Hannah Arendt, a critic who is also a Jew that commented on the Eichmann trial, I learned that Israel was only formed because of Nazi Germany. Eichmann thought that Nazi's were trying to create separate state for just the Jews to live in, which eventually sort of happened, but he was tricked and hence came the Holocaust. Eichmann in Jerusalem is no doubt a controversial book but to get some understanding of the history of Israel it's a good starting point.

I'm mentioning all this because it shows the importance of being active and doing all your own research. These topics are constantly hidden and pushed aside and it is going to take effort for understanding to come to light.

There's a good explanatory video on Instagram that shows that yes both these places have an intricate and harsh history, but it is all about power. Just like how I talk about power imbalance in this book. Palestine doesn't have the power to fight back in a way they can win, the violence is hopeless. 

I am still so naive about the situation and history. I will probably do doubt say something wrong, something controversial because of how deep-rooted the conflict is. But I have the privilege of having time to read a lot (right now) so I will learn more about the situation. I hope everyone is safe and if you ever need to talk just message me!

Sorry to end such a lovely chapter with such heavy facts but sadly that's reality. I hope everyone has a good day.

Thank you so much for reading.