Take My Hand - Lashton

Chapter Thirty-one

Chapter Thirty-one

-

He had barely slept. The room felt strange. He felt like an intruder and he could hear unfamiliar noises. At midnight he had heard footsteps and he wondered if Ashton was sneaking in to see him. To lay with him. But two sets went past his door into the next.

By morning Luke was imagining them laying together. Ashton's arm draped around her shoulder. They were probably still asleep but he could picture them smiling. And he was here alone, no arms to protect him. He began to wonder if this was a mistake. He needed someone right now, he didn't want to be alone. He wouldn't be alone if Aaron was there.

Luke couldn't lie with his thoughts any longer. He slipped on some dirty clothes he wore when leaving the hospital and picked up his book. When he opened his door he froze. Again he felt like an intruder. He felt like he should not move from the room until he was told to. It was not his house and he shouldn't touch their stuff. Not even the floor.

Stella and Ashton had explained to him yesterday to help himself to whatever he wanted. He had an en suite. They gave him a new toothbrush and fresh towels. And they had brought a couple of items of food for him after Stella had asked him what he had liked. The house was his to roam but it felt wrong.

After a couple of minutes of his heart racing, Luke quietly walked towards the stairs. Testing each step to ensure it did not make a noise. He didn't want to wake them after how charitable they had been.

At the bottom of the stairs, he looked both ways. Living room or kitchen? He entered the kitchen. He smiled at the deep red sky forming outside. They lived a little outside of the city and the sky wasn't as clouded as their small flat. Their windows were grander and natural light would radiate the house. He wondered if that was why there were so happy. If Aaron and himself lived here, would things we different? Did pollution really corrupt people?

His book clutched to his chest, Luke ran his finger along the counter, going closer to the wall and letting his hover over the kettle. He hadn't seen one in two months and he missed the conventional device.

When he came to the fridge he blinked back a couple of tears. He let his hand linger on the handle but could not find the strength to pull it open. Was it because he found it rude or because he didn't want to face what was inside — Luke wasn't sure.

He found himself back at the kettle and wanted some tea. But he worried that if he boiled it the noise might wake them. And they didn't explicitly say he could use the kettle. He didn't want to get into trouble.

Luke decided to leave the kitchen and enter the living room. The curtains were open but the room faced their small garden; no one could see in. There was enough natural light for him to see the words on his book cover. He sighed in relief. He didn't want to waste their electricity.

Sitting on the edge of the sofa, the same place he had sat yesterday evening, Luke opened up his book. He let the words calm his mind until he had to face real people.

-

"I'm not a personal assistant Luke!" Stella beamed as she entered the living room still in her pyjamas.

"I know—" Luke jumped, closing the book shut and sitting up straight. He had begun to slouch and was worried he messed up their sofa.

Stella sighed and sat down next to him. "You're supposed to be doing this on your own Luke. Learning to take care of yourself again without others. Without Aaron." Luke remained silent and stared straight in front of him. "I don't mind making your breakfast for you but it would be better if you could do it yourself. Don't be afraid to touch things!"