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Shit.

What do I do what do I do.

I stared at the screen of my phone.

Jay incoming call

I'm overthinking things. It's gonna be okay, he just probably wants to say something quick and will just disappear like always, right? I thought to myself. I brush those thoughts away and slowly clicked the answer button.

My heart is beating fast. I don't know what to say nor what to expect. So instead I just placed the phone to my ear and listened to what he says.

jay: hi

His voice. I missed his voice. I haven't heard it for so long, but now that I finally do I feel like floating. I can feel my eyes tearing up.

jay: you know it would be nice if you said something.

He laughs. I took a deep breath and spoke.

ave: hey

jay: how are you?

ave: i'm good

I didn't have much to say to him. Do I miss him? Sure. Do I want to punch him in the face for constantly leaving me? Definitely. Yet, I still answered his call.

jay: can you do me a favor?

I knew it. He never called just because he wants to talk to me, but for a favor. I might just be overthinking, I told myself.

ave: what is it?

jay: go over to your window and look at the sky.

I was surprised by his unusual request but obliged anyway. I walked over to the window where I usually see Jay on the other side, I opened the window and looked at the sky above.

jay: are you there?

ave: mhm. I'm looking at the sky, just like what you've asked.

jay: don't you think it's amazing.

ave: what is?

I say as I look at the stars above us. I see how they shine and light up the sky. I see how amazing they are.

jay: the fact that every single one of us is all under the same sky. no matter how far or how close you are, you somehow feel connected just by looking at the sky.

With what he said I then looked at the sky and thought of how far Jay was. How sad it is that he's so far away.

jay: i miss you ave.

I almost dropped my phone from what he said. But I didn't buy it, how can he ignore me then tell me he misses me?

jay: and whenever I think about you,
I just look at the sky and think of how
I wish you were by my side.

I want to cry. I want to tell him I miss him. I want to shout at him. But I can't. I can't do any of that. So instead I asked something I've been meaning to ask.

ave: why didn't you call?

He stayed silent for a while.

jay: I'm busy with some stuff here.
i barely have time for myself ave,
but I did squeeze in some time
for your big day.

I smiled, but it didn't reach my eye. I'm happy that he at least thought of me. Even a bit.

jay: happy birthday ave.
it's gonna be another amazing
year with you, just like the amazing
person that you are.

ave: thank you and yes,
i'm looking forward to that.

I heard him laugh and i could only imagine the look he had on his face. His eyes barely seen while he smiles brightly.

jay: i'll make it up to you Ave.

I told him it was getting late so I had to say goodbye. He said he had some stuff to do too so we both decided to end the call.

I looked at the sky one more time and spoke

"i miss you too" 


Lots of love :)
- ims

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