fifty-nine | back to work together

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You hated the idea of leaving Amelia with someone other than yourself or your wife. You had to do it, so you and JJ could both go back to work, but entrusting someone else with the care of your four-month-old daughter was heart-wrenching. JJ was able to reassure you a little bit, but the first day you were going to leave her with the nanny, you had to fight to keep from crying until you got in the car.

JJ assured you that the woman was responsible, trustworthy, and fantastic with babies, since she was who JJ and Will had hired a few years prior to watch Henry until they sent him to daycare. You were glad JJ was so confident, but it didn't abate your anxiety about leaving your baby in the hands of someone else.

It was the first day you were going to work together. Knowing you would immediately break down in the car, JJ shut her door and placed her hand on your back. "Oh, honey...I know. I know. It's hard." She grabbed your hand. "We just have to get through the day, and then we get to go home and snuggle with our babies." She kissed the back of your hand and then started driving.

For half the drive you cried, and for the other half you fixed your makeup in the mirror of the sunshade. When you pulled up to a red light, you asked JJ, "How do I look? Be honest."

She placed her fingers under your chin and turned your face, glancing between you and the stoplight. "You look fine. Honestly,"

"Okay," you sighed, trying to keep it together. "Thanks, love."

You got to work a few minutes early. After she parked, JJ took your hands and said, "I know how hard it is. This is hard for me, too. We're gonna be okay. Remember, we just have to get through the day. Take it one day at a time, okay, angel?" She smiled and gave your hands a squeeze. You bit your lip and avoided eye contact, but nodded your understanding. "We've gotta head up now," she said.

Everybody was glad to have both you and JJ back in the office, and they were all giving updated congratulations on the wedding now that JJ was around. Analyzing cases on which you were consulting was a decent distraction from your separation anxiety. Everyone ate lunch together that day. Before, you thought you wanted to be alone with JJ, but as you ate with the team, you realized it was good to escape the little bubble of your family. You didn't have to focus on the worries and the hard things as much.

You and JJ wasted no time leaving and getting home as soon as you were able to. The moment the work day ended, you said goodbye to Hotch and got in the car and left. Both of you were eager to see the kids. You picked up Henry from daycare and chatted with him on the way home. He'd had a good day. He told you all about his crafts, his friends, what happened at recess, and every other aspect of his day. You listened intently, just the same as you would listen to an adult. The smile on his face brightened your day.

Henry wanted to hold his little sister, so you and JJ sat on either side of him to see her at the same time. He never stopped being so sweet to her. "Hi, Amelia!" He was now able to say her name, but occasionally called her Mila as a nickname. "I love you, little baby..."

He kissed her head, then smiled up at his mom, who was running her fingers through his shaggy blond hair. "What're you lookin' at?" she laughed, putting on a silly face for him.

He giggled and looked back down at Amelia. "Lookin' at you, Mommy,"

"Oh, yeah?" She kissed his head. "I love you, my sweet boy,"

"I love you too!" He whipped around to look at you. "And I love you, Mama! And I love Daddy, and Amelia too. What are we having for dinner?" he asked JJ. You both laughed.

"Uh, chicken, potatoes, carrots, and corn," she told him. "You hungry now, buddy, or do you wanna eat later?"

"Um, now, please,"

"Okay," she chuckled. You kissed her before she got up to start dinner.

You took Amelia back from Henry and let him go play. She had been fussy for a couple minutes, and she was almost certainly hungry. As your wife cooked for the family, you fed your daughter her dinner. Stroking the soft, thin hair on her little head, you let her nurse until she fell asleep. Every step you took was considered with care as you brought her into the nursery.

"She go down alright?" JJ asked once you were back in the kitchen with her. You held her from behind, laying your chin on her shoulder and kissing her neck and cheek.

"Out like a light,"

"And you? How are you after today? I know it was a bit of a stressful day for both of us,"

"I'm good now that we're home. How about you, Jen? It was hard for you too,"

"It was," she sighed, "but we're okay. We made it through. And I feel the same way: it's a lot better when we're with the kids. Plus, I've been through this before. It doesn't get easier with another kid, but I'm glad I know what it feels like, at least. I can help you get through it, and cope with it better myself the second time around. I know it's tough. I'm feeling it, too. We're gonna be fine, baby. Promise."

Show Me the Stars - Jennifer Jareau x ReaderWhere stories live. Discover now