Show Me the Stars - Jennifer Jareau x Reader

eighteen | telling emily

Your first appointment was right after work one day the next week. You were antsy all day, and Emily even asked you if you were okay.

"Y/N. I've known you your whole life. I know when you're lying. What's going on?"

"Emily, can we talk about this later? I promise. I just need to get to some stuff first,"

"Shitty excuse," she grumbled, half-joking so you knew she wasn't mad. "Are you in danger? Is it something with Levi?"

"Uh, kind of something with him? But I swear I'm safe. Can we talk tonight, maybe?" you asked.

Emily pursed her lips and nodded. All she wanted was for you to be okay. She trusted JJ to handle it, but she still felt guilty for not being the protective big sister she wanted to be.

In the car after a horrifically stressful day of work, you both sang along to the radio as you shook your leg rapidly. JJ saw this display of anxiety and wished she could do more to help you.

Before you guys got out of the car, JJ put her hand on your leg and felt you tense up. She realized how high on your leg her hand was and removed it. "Oh, I'm sorry, love, I didn't realize." She put her hand on your knee this time. "How's this?"

"Better," you breathed.

"If you'd rather I didn't touch you, that's okay, honey,"

"No, I'm good. Just got...upset. I'm okay now," you told her. She smiled kindly. JJ was always so patient. She cupped your face and looked straight in your eyes.

"Love, anything that happens — anything at all, we can get through it. And it is your decision, what you want to do. Not mine, not anyone's but yours. Okay?"

"Okay," you mumbled, nodding. JJ's hands were still on your face. Somehow it was comforting.

"If you decide you want my input, I can give you my two cents. But ultimately this is all up to you. No matter what, though, I'm gonna be here for you. I've got you, pretty girl, always."

Unexpectedly for JJ, you leaned over and kissed her. It lasted longer than either of you really expected it to, until you pulled away at last and brushed some stray hair out of JJ's face. She wore a soft, gorgeous smile.

"I love you, Jay. Thank you for being here."

She held your hand tight as you went upstairs to the obstetrician's office. You didn't ever want to let go. She stroked your thumb with her own, and you took comfort in it.

You had trouble focusing on what the doctor was saying. It didn't seem real. But JJ was taking rapid notes, so you were reassured.

You can vaguely remember seeing the ultrasound. Hearing 'seven weeks along'. And you did your best to refocus and regroup when JJ took your hand once again.

"What are our options?" JJ asked the doctor whose name you didn't catch. You'd ask JJ later.

You were not going to cry in this fucking doctor's office. You let JJ get the information and you took the pamphlet in your sweaty hand.

JJ thanked the doctor, quietly telling her that you'd been having a hard time with this and that's why you were so unresponsive, and then held your hand as you went back down to the car.

"I'm sorry," you told her with a quavering voice, "I'm really stressed out, I barely heard anything she said,"

"That's okay, baby, I understand." She ran her hand over your arm. "I got all the info, we can talk about it all when you're feeling a little more ready. Let's get you home. Or do you wanna go talk to Emily?"