Show Me the Stars - Jennifer Jareau x Reader

fifteen | i'm kind of worried

[sick warning, anxiety attack]

JJ kissed your head before getting out of bed to make breakfast and coffee. "Hmm?" you groaned.

"Hey, baby, how're you?" she asked.

"Good. What're you doing?"

"I'm gonna make breakfast. You want pancakes?"

"Mm, sure. I'll be up in a minute, babe, 'kay?" you mumbled. JJ smiled and nodded before she went to the kitchen.

You forced yourself to get out of bed, shutting off the alarm clock so it wouldn't go off in a little while; you were both already up and didn't need it anymore.

JJ lit up when you came into the kitchen, and you tentatively put your hands on her hips. "Is—is this okay, babe?" you asked, and she heard the timidity in your tone.

"Yes, sweetheart. Y'know, it's really nice, feeling your hands on me. As long as you're comfortable, I love feeling you touch me," she breathed. How did JJ always know how to treat you to give you butterflies?

Your hands seemed to get more easily comfortable on her hips, and you kissed her cheek. You rested your chin on her shoulder.

"You need any help making breakfast?"

JJ turned and smiled at you. "No, not unless you really want to." You kissed her and hopped up to sit on the counter. "How're you today, my beautiful girl?"

"Uh, fine, I guess." She set a cup of coffee in front of you. You picked it up and the smell flooded your senses. You set it back down and rubbed your nose, as if that would help. JJ noticed this change in your demeanor.

"You okay?" she asked you. You swallowed and nodded. "You don't look like you're okay. Is there anything I can do?"

"Uh...no, no, I'm good." The coffee was still overpowering your sense of smell, and it made you feel awfully sick. JJ watched you hop down off the counter and rush to the bathroom.

JJ followed you and held your hair back as you threw up, and she lightly pat your back. "Poor baby..."

You sighed and wiped your mouth before flushing the toilet and getting up to wash your hands. "Ugh, sorry," you groaned.

"Are you okay?" she asked. "You said that you've been feeling sick for a few days, do you think you might be coming down with something?"

"Ugh, I don't know. But, um, about what I told you last night..." you started, attempting to collect your thoughts.

"Oh, honey, we don't have to talk about it now." JJ put her hand on your shoulder.

"No, I—he, he always wanted to have sex. So, when he..." She understood. "...it wasn't the only recent time that he, uh— yeah. So I'm kind of worried..."

JJ made a face as though she gasped, though silently, and let out that breath in a big sigh. "That you might be pregnant." You gave her a single nod. "Which would explain..."

"Uh-huh. So, I don't...I don't know what to do, Jayje," you said, and it was clear from your voice and the look on your face that you were about to cry.

"It's okay, my love. Can I ask you something?"

"Mm-hmm," you wept.

"How late are you?"

You started to do some math. "Three weeks, maybe? I thought I might just be stressed, y'know? I don't know..."

"It's okay. You don't have to think about it all right now,"

You seemed to ignore her, continuing to freak out. "What if I'm pregnant? With Levi's baby? How am I even supposed to handle that?"

"Shh, shh, baby, it's all okay, we're gonna get through it together. C'mere, love." She hugged you and shut her eyes tight. She was desperate to be strong for you, but she was scared of this too.

You couldn't get ahold of your breathing. JJ noticed the terror in your face and said, "Whoa, baby, okay, let's go sit down. We're gonna go sit on the couch, okay?"

She led you out of the bathroom, one hand holding yours and the other on your upper back. You sunk down onto the couch and put your head in your hands, gasping for breath. Your chest heaved, and JJ rubbed your back.

"Y/N, we're gonna take some deep breaths. Breathe in with me— good girl, and out." She took you through ten of those, and slowly you started to calm down.

"I'm so scared," you breathed. "JJ, what do I do?"

"Honestly, baby, I don't know, but we're gonna figure it all out together. Whatever happens, I'm going to be by your side. I promise you that. Now, are you feeling alright to go to work?"

"Uh, I...I don't know..."

"Okay. I can call Hotch, tell him you woke up really sick,"

"It's not untrue," you reasoned. JJ allowed herself to smile. You put your head on JJ's shoulder and she hugged you.

"Okay, beautiful, you take the day off. God knows you could use it. I'll let Hotch know, you just rest. And I'll take Henry to school, get him ready, all that. Just relax today. You should try and take a nap. I'll text you when I have lunch, see if you're awake. If you're up, I'll call you, if not, then obviously I won't," she chuckled lightly.

"Can you, uh, can you not tell Emily about this, please? I don't want her to deal with this until we know anything for sure," you requested, trying to focus on JJ's hand moving up and down your back. She nodded. She'd do anything you asked just then, and while she thought Emily could help you feel better about it, she didn't want to betray you or try to push back on your request.

"Yeah, of course. Do you want me to stop and get a test on my way home?" Tears sprung back into your eyes. You tried to nod. "Okay, love. Hey, look at me."

You stared right in her face and fought back the tears. JJ held your hands in hers — her hands were icy — and she told you, "Everything is going to be alright, my love. We're going to go through this together. I'm not gonna let you do this alone, any of it. Whether or not you're pregnant, whatever happens with Levi...I will be here as long as you'll have me. You got that?"

"Mhm," was all you could manage to get out. JJ kissed your hairline and hugged you.

"I'm gonna go wake Henry up, okay, my love?"

"Yeah, okay," you breathed. You dried your tears and watched JJ walk away. You laid down on the couch and hugged a pillow until a still-sleepy Henry brightened when he saw you and ran to give you a hundred kisses.