Show Me the Stars - Jennifer Jareau x Reader

fifty-three | first day back

Another month passed by before you went back to work. Amelia was two months old to the day. JJ hadn't taken the entirety of her leave, so you two decided that she would take the remainder of it once you had taken the whole of yours. Knowing JJ was at home with Amelia, you were less anxious than if you had left her with a nanny, but still, you were finding out what JJ had felt when she returned to work.

The day seemed to be a thousand years long. You ate lunch with Emily, who asked you with a smile, "Are you alright? You look...far-off." You gave your sister a smile to match her own and sighed, sitting back in your chair, your sandwich still in your hand. "They're fine, honey," she chuckled. "You can go call them if it would make you feel better,"

"I know they're okay; that's...not quite it. I don't want to miss any time I can have with them, I guess, is how to explain it. Anytime I'm not with them, I wish I was. I feel like I'll blink and she'll be leaving me." You didn't feel the particular sting of tears in your eyes, but rather a general sadness throughout your body.

"JJ will leave you? Or Amelia?"

You took a moment to think. "Both, I suppose. Everything feels so temporary..."

"Honey." Emily took your hand. "JJ loves you immensely. And you're Amelia's mother! Your baby is gonna grow up, of course, but you're gonna get to watch it and help her become who she'll be. You're a great mother, and I'm glad I get to be here for it."

You both stood, since it was clear you needed a hug, and it was as though she absorbed your anxieties for a moment in this embrace. "I love you, Em,"

"I love you too." Each day reminded you how lucky you were to have your sister. In a family that tended to be quite cold, you and Emily always stayed close.

You texted JJ before lunch ended; you didn't want to call her in case she was sleeping, which she truly needed. She replied later, saying everything was alright with both her and Amelia and that she loved you.

Finally getting home was the greatest feeling. JJ wrapped her arms around you and kissed your cheek. "Hey, angel. How was work?"

"Oh, you know," you sighed. "I get what you mean about work being hard. I hated being away from you guys,"

"I know. But you're home now, love, and we're so happy to have you here. She's sleeping,"

"I figured. Kiss me?" JJ smiled and held you against her body as she kissed you tenderly. You whispered, "Missing you is so hard, Jay,"

"Oh, you'll live," she chuckled. "Come sit. Let me hold you." You sat on the couch with JJ's arms around you and her hands rubbing up and down your back and upper arm. "Pretty girl...everything's better when we're together. Everything. You're the love of my life, you know that?" You nodded. She kissed you over and over. "Good. I'll always love you, my Y/N. Always, always,"

"JJ," you whispered. You both turned to look at one another. "This life, the four of us together, this is what I've dreamed about. And I want this forever. I don't ever want to be without you or without the kids. I love you,"

"I love you too. Is everything okay? Where is this coming from?"

You laid your head back down and sighed, "I've just been thinking a lot. About us. What you are to me,"

"Yeah?"

"And I think, when I talk about you or think about you, I would much rather be talking or thinking about my wife. Not my girlfriend."

She shuffled a little, and you sat back up, smiling at her. JJ grabbed your hands, asking, "You want to get married?"

"Do you not?"

"No, I do! I would love that!" She was of the verge of tears. "I—I've been worried that, because you were engaged to Levi and he was so terrible, that you wouldn't wanna get married to anybody. After how awful he was, I would understand if he'd ruined that for you. But I've wanted this, love. It's never changed how I feel about you or about us, but I've always wished..."

"I know," you said. "It's been hard to get past all the implications of what he did and my feelings around it, so thank you for not trying to rush me through that. I'm in a really good place now, though, Jayje, and I want more than anything to marry you and solidify our commitment to this life we've made."

She kissed you, and you felt her tears transfer to your skin. "I love you, Y/N,"

"I love you, Jennifer."

You both cried for a little while longer, and she asked you, "How much do you want, like, a big ceremony and everything?"

"I don't care. I'd marry you at the courthouse if that's what you wanted. I really just want to be married to you," you said.

"Okay, because I think just having a nice party with our friends and whoever we feel like inviting is good enough for me. Imagine the team's faces if we were to elope," she laughed. When you just smiled, she asked, "Wait, babe, do you actually want to elope? And party later?"

You raised your eyebrows and kept smiling. "I mean..."

"Hey, I'm down for that. Let's take some time to think about it. I don't wanna rush it,"

"Okay. I love you, Jen,"

"I love you too. Want me to start dinner?"