So here's what you missed on Glee.
And that's what you missed on... Glee!
Now. Onto our chapter.
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["Our Last Days" by The Fray.]
Jake: Sunset, home town, America. Roads I used to run. These walls used to hold heroes. Black and white and gone.
As Jake sat in a stool on the auditorium stage, Will sat in one of the seats, a smile on his face.
Jake: I could show you all the places that we used to go. That ain't there no more. But hold up, dear darling, it's alright. 'Cause I am sure.
In the crowd, Kurt, Blaine, Sam, Artie, Unique, Tina, Sugar, Brittany and Joe were watching him, smiles on most of their faces.
Jake: This love will stand now and always. These hearts will burn 'til our last days.
"He's still so sexy," said Sugar.
In the row in front of her, Sam said, "No, he's not."
Jake: When you're young you just got to know. What it's all about. Then you're old with a head full of memories. You could do without.
The women smiled and they all turned to give Jake the attention again. He was singing his heart out, dedicating this song to the New Directions and McKinley.
Jake: It's enough to make you wonder. Can anything last at all? In this broken town. But you may be the one place I'm sure about.
As he sang the chorus, everyone really felt what he was singing about. He looked around at them and wonder what his life might've been like without glee club.
Jake: This love will stand now and always. These hearts will burn 'til our last days.
He adjusted the microphone as he came closer to it and clapped his hands. The others in the audience did the same.
Jake: Have you had enough? Have you had enough?
After he stopped clapping, he sang the chorus once again, giving it one final strong go and ending on a high note.
Jake: These hearts will burn 'til our last days. This love will stand now and always. These hearts will burn 'til our last days.
The song faded out and he smiled at everyone as they stood up and cheered her on. "Wow," said Will. "That was great, Jake."
"Puckerman," said Jake. "Jake Puckerman." They all cheered and Jake walked off stage, saying, "Thank you so much for that you guys. It was silly."
"No, we owed it to you from a long time ago," said Will. "I should've never cut you off the first time."
"Now he can finally stop crying about it every time we return to this school," joked Unique.
"We better clear out," said Kurt, looking at his watch. "They'll be in here to set up for graduation any time."
"You're right," nodded Will. "I guess that's it for now... This was great everyone. We'll see each other after graduation."
"We love you, Mr. Schue!" Sugar exclaimed as Brittany ushered her out of the aisle and they all started leaving.
Will laughed, getting a pat on the back from Jake, who'd just had one of his biggest wishes fulfilled before the school was shut down at the end of the day.
***
"Hey, thanks for checking in," said Amity, standing in Julie's bathroom and speaking in a hushed voice. "I spent all day with her yesterday. Which I've gotta say wasn't easy because she had her entire styling team here."
"What'd she do to her hair?" asked Alex.
"How'd you guess?" she responded.
Alex sighed, "It's kind of her MO. So what'd she do? Cut it? Dye it? A little bit of both?"
"She just dyed it brown," said Amity. "Nothing too abnormal. Yet. She spent all day on it and I guess getting a makeover helped..." She heard some movement a few feet away. "Shoot. I think she's waking up now."
"Well, thanks for checking in Amity," said Alex. "I really, really appreciate you doing this for me."
"It's for both of you," Amity corrected him. "And myself as well. This is helping me too, trust me. I gotta go but... I'll check in again later."
***
When John woke up, he nearly fell over from the couch, forgetting that he'd fallen asleep there and not his bed.
Beer bottles and cans fell off with him and his head started to pound.
"Ugh..." he complained quietly, rubbing his head. He headed for the kitchen to whip himself up a bloody mary, anything to pass the hangover.
On his way, he checked his phone. Nothing from Marley, but he did have a few texts from Kitty, Amity, Mandy and Sam.
He ignored them all and tossed his phone aside, opening his fridge and reaching for the vodka.
***
"Here you go," Amity pulled a water bottle from the fridge and walked it over to the table, where Julie was having breakfast.
"Amity, you really don't have to keep staying here with me," she said, shaking her head as she accepted the water. "It's really nice of you but... I don't think you should waste your time watching over me. I'm fine. And besides, I'm sure you've got things to do."
Amity laughed. "Cry in my apartment all alone and think about how I made the worst decision of becoming a single mother," she said.
Julie looked up at her, surprised.
"Sorry," Amity shook her head. "I'm being dramatic. Honestly, being here with you keeps me from thinking about everything that's been happening lately. And from what I heard both Tracy and Damian have left town so... At least I don't have to see either of them."
"Tracy is such a snake," said Julie, rolling her eyes. "I can't believe I asked her to collaborate."
"You did?" said Amity.
"I was umm..." she said hesitantly. "Drunk. It was at the party."
"Wow," said Amity, trying to hold back a laugh. "That's... something."
"You can make fun of me," said Julie. "It wasn't the worst part of my week."
"I'm really sorry about you and Alex," Amity took a seat. "But maybe... Maybe you guys can talk it out and save your relationship."
"I don't think so, Amity," Julie responded, her voicing trailing off a little as it grew weaker. "Alex seemed pretty done. And to tell you the truth. I think I'm pretty done too."
***
"Thank you everyone for coming back here," said Sam as he stood in the choir room at McKinley. "Graduation is going on right now so Finn and Mr. Schue and a bunch of other people are there now in the auditorium. We figured we could continue singing here. So... Without further ado, Quinn?"
Quinn smiled and stepped up to the center, patting Sam's shoulder and indicating he could go now.
"We felt we couldn't possibly end this week without a performance," said Quinn while Sam took a seat at the front, "from the iconic Unholy Trinity. Ladies..."
Santana and Brittany hurried out of their seats and joined her just as the song started.
["I'll Never Fall In Love Again" by Dionne Warwick.]
Quinn: What do you get when you fall in love? A guy with a pin to burst your bubble. That's what you get for all your trouble. I'll... never fall in love again. I'll never fall in love again.
Kitty turned to Bree and the two simultaneously rolled their eyes.
Brittany: What do you get when you kiss a guy? You get enough germs to catch pneumonia.
The three former Cheerios were giving another one of their predictable performances, at least Kitty thought so.
Quinn: After you do, he'll never phone ya. I'll... never fall in love again.
Bree was thinking that they were only taking advantage of Julie's absence to do so because their trio was no match for theirs.
Brittany: Don't you know that I'll never fall in love again?
But Quinn hadn't been thinking of them when she asked the girls to perform with her.
Quinn: Don't tell me what's it all about. 'Cause I've been there and I'm glad I'm out. Out of those chains, those chains that bind you. That is why I'm here to remind you.
She'd passed up on the opportunity to sing with them at the beginning of the week and now that it was Friday and they had one day left, she didn't wanna miss her remaining chance.
Quinn: What do you get when you fall in love?
She turned around and joined Brittany as Santana faced the crowd for her solo.
Santana: You only get a life of pain and sorrow. So for at least until tomorrow. I'll... never fall in love again.
Then they all faced the chairs and Quinn looked over at Sam, who was smiling and tapping his feet.
Quinn: No, no, I'll never fall in love again.
None of them were particularly upset about McKinley shutting down, at least not like Finn or Sam were.
Brittany: I'm out of those chains, those chains that bind you.
But there was something about being together, performing just the three of them, that made them a little more nostalgic.
Santana: That is why I'm here to remind you.
As they wrapped up the song, all smiles and charming looks at people watching, Bree gave Kitty the signal. They needed to talk.
Quinn: What do you get when you fall in love? You only get lies and pain and sorrow. So for at least until tomorrow. I'll... never fall in love again.
The girls did a few twirls at the center and then stopped together, posing as a trio, as usual, and the performance ended.
Quinn: Don't you know that I'll never fall in love again. I'll never fall in love again.
***
"We have to get Julie over here," said Bree as she and Kitty walked into the restroom across the hall.
Kitty pulled a lip balm from her purse and said, "I don't see that happening. Not with everything going on with Alex."
Bree sighed, "It's really serious. The drug stuff. But I think if we distract her with music, she'll just... I don't know."
Kitty put down the balm and said, "I don't know. It's like every relationship is falling apart right now and if I wasn't a cynic I'd be upset. Have we even checked in on Marley?"
"I think she's keeping her distance," said Bree. "With good reason. God, everything is such a mess. How are you doing?"
"Probably better than they are," said Kitty, shrugging.
Bree took a deep breath. "I think this calls for a girls' night."
"I'm way ahead of you," said Kitty, searching for her phone through her purse. "I'm gathering the girls at my house tonight. A little housewarming party to get us all together and... We'll see how we can heal each other."
***
When Amity walked downstairs from a nap, she heard the sweet sound of music. Julie was playing the piano, so she leaned against the entry and asked, "Is that new?"
"It's not mine," said Julie. "I wish it was but... You know how John sang something with the artist he auditioned with?" Amity nodded. "It's probably too late for me to go today but... Everyone's gonna hang out at school tomorrow before they start tearing the school down and... I thought if I could work up the courage I could show up there tomorrow and sing something."
"Who did you audition with again?" Amity asked.
"Sara Bareilles," Julie said sheepishly. "She's been a heavy inspiration for me as a songwriter and as a singer."
"Yeah, I can hear it sometimes when you sing actually," Amity nodded. "That's really cool."
"Thanks," said Julie, taking a deep breath. "I went through all her songs trying to see which one I might do and... I wanna do something honest but I also don't wanna choke in front of everyone."
Amity put her hands in the air and said, "Me. I'm your practice audience. It's perfect."
"What?" Julie said, laughing nervously. "Right now?"
"Sure," Amity shrugged. "Let me just grab a chair. It's not like we have anything better to do, right?"
Julie thought about it for a second and then said, "Yeah. Ok, I guess that sounds good."
***
"You didn't show up to school today," said Sam as he sat in Alex's parents' den. Alex sat across from him, carrying Rosie in his arms as she slept.
"Yeah, I'm a little busy here," Alex indicated down to his sleeping infant.
"What's going on?" Sam asked. "When I heard you were staying here, I just... Should I be concerned?"
Alex hesitated, not sure how much he wanted to reveal at this point. But Sam was the father of his stepdaughters and they had that bond. They were family. He had to know.
"We're splitting up," said Alex. "Me and Julie."
"What?" Sam exclaimed.
"Shh," Alex nodded down to Rosie again.
"Sorry, but what?" Sam said more quietly. "Why? Since when? You're getting a divorce? Really?"
"It's not really a divorce, man," Alex shrugged. "We're not legally married so we're just... splitting up. I told her that I wanted some time apart to think about it and that it was what I was leaning towards but... I'm more than leaning towards it, Sam. Honestly, we just have too many issues."
"Everyone has issues," said Sam.
"Not like us," Alex disagreed.
"Dude," Sam looked sternly across at him. "Think about what you're doing here. You love Julie. She loves you. You wanna throw away everything you have 'cause it's gotten hard?"
"It's not that simple," said Alex. "She's... off the rails, Sam. And I can't be there picking up the pieces every time. I can't do that to myself. You know that better than anyone."
"Ok, but remember what happened just two years ago?" said Sam. "When she was off the rails in Venice. Tony and I wanted her to stay in rehab."
"Maybe she should've," shrugged Alex.
"No, listen to me," Sam insisted. "You were the only one fighting for her back then, telling everyone she needed to come home and be with us. What happened to that Alex? Huh?"
"That Alex has seen your side of things now," said Alex. "That Alex is exhausted. I mean, is it always gonna have to be like this?"
"Yes, maybe so," nodded Sam. "I don't know the specifics but I do know that she's never gonna be able to change the way that she is. And if you love her that way, there's no reason you should be giving up so easily right?"
"I have to think of Rosie," said Alex. "Just like you've had to think of the twins, right? Time after time."
"You think she'd harm them?" asked Sam. "'Cause you were the one who told me once I was crazy for ever thinking that. Just think about this, Alex. I can't tell you what to do but we're family and I'd hate not to try. What you and Julie have is special. I know from being with Quinn that... Once you find that thing that really works with the right person... You'll want to hold on as long as you can. So hold on. Don't throw it all away 'cause you're scared."
Alex sat there silently and nodded weakly. Everyone was telling him what he was trying not to let himself think about. That he was making the wrong choices, and throwing it all away.
***
["Hold My Heart" by Sara Bareilles.]
Julie: I never meant to be the one to let you down. If anything, I thought I saw myself going first.
Amity sat on a chair, facing Julie's back as she played the piano.
Julie: I didn't know how to stick around. How to see anybody but me be getting hurt.
Her voice started out soft, which she wasn't used to after all her power pop hits.
Julie: I keep remembering the summer night. And the conversation breaking up the mood. I didn't want to tell you you were right. Like the season changing, oh, I felt it too.
She got a little louder when the chorus came around and Amity was wondering how she wasn't already in tears.
Julie: Does anybody know how to hold my heart? How to hold my heart? 'Cause I don't want to let go, let go, let go too soon.
Maybe Julie was just way more of a professional but the song was getting to her and even though her mouth was shut she still felt like she was choking on non-existent words.
Julie: I want to tell you so before the sun goes dark. How to hold my heart. 'Cause I don't want to let go, let go, let go of you.
Julie was just sitting there, playing effortlessly and beautifully, emoting every word but not cracking. It was unreal.
Julie: I'm not the kind to try to tell you lies. But the truth is you've been hiding from it too.
And Amity was trouble fazed, feeling herself get shaky and her eyes tear up.
Julie: I see the end sneaking in behind your eyes. Saying things no words could ever do.
She listened to Julie singing, so sad, and it was like all the tears Julie was holding back were transported onto her because they started running down her face, like silent streams. Everything around her was falling apart and she, too, felt like she'd lost all she wanted and cared about recently.
Julie: Does anybody know how to hold my heart? How to hold my heart? 'Cause I don't want to let go, let go, let go too soon. I want to tell you so before the sun goes dark. How to hold my heart. 'Cause I don't want to let go, let go, let go of you.
But Julie just kept placing, facing away from her, unaware that she was the one crying in the back.
Julie: Is anybody listening? 'Cause I'm crying... Is anybody listening?
As she finished belting out the bridge, Julie slammed down on the keys and stopped playing for just a second before continuing.
Julie: Does anybody know how to hold my heart? How to hold my heart? 'Cause I don't want to let go, let go, let go too soon. I want to tell you so before the sun goes dark. How to hold my heart. 'Cause I don't want to let go, let go, let go...
She played more gently and sang more clearly.
Julie: I don't want let go, let go of you. I don't want to let go...
And then she stopped altogether, at once, and sat there silently for a few seconds.
Neither of them seemed to know what to say so Amity broke the silence first. "That was beautiful," she said.
Julie stood up and nodded. "I need to lie down," she said.
As Julie made her way through the living room and to the staircase, Amity said, "You really should sing it tomorrow. I think you can handle it."
But Julie didn't respond. She disappeared up the stairs.
***
"I just talked to Marley," said Unique, walking into Kitty's living room, where Harmony, Kitty, Shana and Bree were gathered. "She's not coming."
"What?" Kitty frowned. "Why not?"
"Couldn't get a sitter for Kai," Unique shrugged.
"I thought that's what fathers were for," Bree said, confused. "Why not let John have him for one night?"
"That's what I said," said Unique. "But she told me he didn't answer any of her calls so... I guess we're not gonna get her tonight."
"That's ok," said Harmony, standing up. "'Cause I finally heard back from Amity and she said she'd love to come down here and is going to tell Julie right away."
"Santana's really sorry she couldn't come, by the way," said Shana. "She's doing this whole thing with Quinn and Brittany and Rachel and Kurt and... I don't know. But she does send her support to Julie and all of us."
"That's sweet," said Unique, while Harmony looked down at her phone again.
"Oh oh," she said. "We have a problem."
"What is that?" asked Bree, concerned.
"Amity says that she went to tell Julie and she wasn't there."
"What do you mean?" Kitty asked. "Wasn't there at her own house?"
Harmony shrugged. "I'm calling Amity now."
***
"Yeah, I just walked into her room and she was gone," Amity explained as she gathered her purse and searched around for her keys. "I swear she was upstairs for like fifteen minutes. I don't know when she could've left but she did."
"Ok, don't even worry girl," said Bree through Harmony's speaker. "We're gonna reach out to her. You just get over here, ok?"
"Yeah, will do," nodded Amity. She hung up the phone, found her keys under a pillow on the couch, and prepared to head out, wondering where Julie could've gone.
She stepped outside and saw that her car was gone, leaving only hers out in driveway. Just as she started to lock up, she heard a loud thunder and looked up at the sky. Grey skies.
"Great..." she sighed, hurrying to her car. Once inside, she took a deep breath, hoping Julie had at least gone somewhere comfortable and safe.
***
"Hello!" Julie pounded on the door and used her purse to shield her face from the rain. "Hello!" She pounded harder. "Come on, I know you're in there! Open up!"
She hit the door with the outer part of her fist as hard as she could until finally, the door opened and a sleepy John stood in front of her. "What the hell, Julie..." he said. He creased his brow and then added, "Did you do something different with your hair? Wasn't it... red?"
"Were you sleeping?" she asked. "All day?"
John shrugged. "It's not that late is it."
"John it's almost seven," she said.
He rolled his eyes and asked, "What do you want?"
"It's raining," she told him, wiping the water from the top of her head.
"Yeah, no shit," he said, looking out at the dark sky. "Jeez... Get in here."
He moved aside and she quickly hurried inside, shivering and kicking off her shoes. "I'm sorry to interrupt your clearly busy day," she said, seeing all the trash layered around the couch, where a single pillow and blanket indicating he had been all day. "I just didn't know where to go."
"Mi casa blah blah blah," John gestured towards the rest of the area. "Can I get you anything to drink? I have... beer and vodka and tequila and sangria and whiskey and rum and..."
As he trailed off and walked towards the kitchen, she said, "Yeah, I get the pattern. I'm good though. I just needed to get out of my house." She looked around and asked, "Marley isn't here, is she?"
"Nope," he said as he grabbed a new beer from the fridge. Laughing he added, "Didn't I tell you? She's not coming back. We're through."
"Really?" asked Julie, beginning to dig through her damp purse.
"Yup," said John, opening his beer and bringing it up to his lips. But before he could drink he said, "Apparently I'm afraid of commitment and evasive and immature. So she doesn't wanna marry me or even be with me anymore."
"Did she say any lies about you or was it just that?" asked Julie, glancing up from her purse. He gave her a look so she said, "Well you are those things. You know that."
"Yeah, but it's the way she was talking to me," he said. "It was insulting. Infantilizing me isn't going to fix our issues anymore than me avoiding them."
"I guess," Julie said. She continued looking through her purse. "Crap..." she said.
"What are you looking for?" he asked.
"I don't know, anything," she said. "I stole something from Kara's purse at Adonis the other day and I put it here."
"What?" he said, laughing. She looked up at him and he realized she was serious. "You stole from Kara? What could you have possibly wanted badly enough to steal from someone?"
"Oh my gosh," said Julie as she opened the small zipper on the backside of her purse. "It's in here!"
She pulled out a little bag and he immediately reached over to take it from her. "Are you crazy?" he exclaimed, but she pulled her hand away from him and stopped him from getting it.
"Nope," she said, putting it down her blouse and sticking it in her bra. "I'm keeping that there for now but we're so using it later."
He made a face at her and said, "Was that French or did you say we? Because there's no way that I'm doing blow with you, Julie."
"Oh come on," she laughed. "You should be glad I got a hold of some because you're in real big need of it. But for now, let me change my mind about that drink."
"A drink, yes," nodded John, opening the fridge. "But no coke. Please."
"Coca-cola?" she joked.
"Sadly, I don't have anything non-alcoholic besides water," he said.
"I'll take the beer," she smiled, so he reached into the fridge and grabbed a bottle for her.
"I'm running low on that so take advantage of it now."
"We'll have to switch to liquor and wine then," she said, taking her bottle towards the bottle opener he had hanging from the wall a few feet away.
"No, no, no," he said immediately. "You are having your one beer and then you're leaving Julie. I can't party tonight. Marley's already pissed about before and I just... I don't want to."
She opened her bottle and turned to him. "Oh come on John," she said. "Screw Marley. And screw Alex too. They're boring. You and I, we know what it's like. We know how to live. That's why we're best friends."
John scowled at her, holding onto his own bottle hesitantly.
"Every night on tour you went out and partied with Alex," Julie reminded him. "And look how much trouble that ended up getting him into. You can't do just one more night with me before you sell your soul to the idea of marrying Marley Rose?"
John shook his head. "You're guilt tripping me? Really?"
"Is it working?" she smiled innocently.
"A little bit," he laughed, holding out his beer. "Drink up, Jules."
She clanked her beer against his and took a big gulp, glad she could count on him for fun, just as she'd expected to.
***
"Hey, you have another visitor," said Tabitha, arriving at the entrance to the den.
"I'm a little busy here," said Alex, trying to get a crying Rosie to suck onto her baby bottle while also .
"Maybe she's not hungry," said Kara.
Alex glanced up and Tabitha said, "I'm, uh, heading home. I'll see you around. And for the record, that was specifically at my brother."
"A pleasure as per usual, Tabby," Kara told her as she left.
Once Tabitha was gone, Alex said, "What are you doing here Kara?"
"I meant to talk to you yesterday but I had a hard time reaching you," she said, coming closer. She stared at Rosie and smiled. "I hadn't met her yet."
"You can get a closer look," Alex laughed. "If you want..."
"I think I'm better watching from back here," said Kara, wincing as Rosie cried out again.
"She just won't eat and..." said Alex, looking down at Rosie and shaking his head. "I don't know what to do."
Kara said, "Have you tried... a pacifier?"
"The pacifier," nodded Alex. "Right. I'm an idiot. Why didn't I think of that first?"
Kara frowned. "You're being sarcastic."
"Yup," he said. "Sorry. But I've really tried everything."
"Have you tried... taking her to Julie?" asked Kara.
"Julie is... busy..." said Alex, not wanting to get into the details with any other person.
"Here, let me try," said Kara, finally coming closer. "Maybe she just needs a more... feminine... presence. No offense, but guys just smell differently and if I was a baby, I'd wanna be held and snuggled by a woman. Gimme..."
Alex hesitated, too protective to ever trust someone like Kara with his baby for more than five minutes. But as she came closer and he realized she smelled like soap and not like smoke or anything like that, he eased up a little and transitioned Rosie from his arms to Kara's.
It took a couple seconds of Kara bouncing her and whispering baby talk to her, but it worked. Rosie calmed down, finally.
"I guess it's official," said Alex, sitting down. "I suck. And I owe you my life."
"That was official years ago," she told him. She laughed and asked, "What are you even doing here?" Looking around she said, "I know I hadn't been here in forever... But I can't imagine you're here all the time."
"Actually, I'm here pretty often," said Alex. "My relationship with my mom's alright. And my dad... That's actually pretty great."
"Really?" said Kara, shocked. "I would've never expected that from you, Alex. I'm actually pretty disappointed. Getting along with your dad is... not sexy."
Alex rolled his eyes. "So what did you actually come for?"
"I can see you have a lot on your plate," she said, looking down at Rosie. "Taking care of a premature baby, all by yourself..."
"We call them preemies now," said Alex.
Kara raised her eyebrows. "Oh."
"Yeah," Alex nodded, letting out a deep breath. "It's a whole thing. And yes, she is difficult. Every now and then she has to be checked on and her body temperature has to be checked too. And a part of me wonders if we should've let her stay at the hospital longer because she's still not out of the woods and... It doesn't help that Julie isn't doing too well either."
"Then maybe you won't want to hear what I saw," Kara said, looking uncomfortable, which was a rarity for her.
Alex's expression changed and he stood back up. "What happened?"
***
"Ugh..." Julie frowned down at her brand new phone. She was lying on the ground, with her feet up on the wall, and carelessly tossed her phone to the ground, hearing it crack.
John watched her from the couch and laughed. "How many more times are you gonna break that?"
"Until people leave me alone," she answered. She looked up at the ceiling and said, "The girls are all hanging out at Kitty's and they want to know where I am so I can join them. But the last thing I wanna do is mope around with them, drinking away my sorrows."
"Isn't that exactly what you're doing here?" he asked her.
She put her feet down and sat up as quickly as she could. "You're right," she said. "This is a party, not a funeral."
She jumped up to her feet and made her way around the couch. "What are you doing, Jules?" he asked her.
"Just putting some music," she said. "We... are gonna have fun tonight..."
She stopped in front of his stereo and started looking through his long collection of CDs. "This looks different," she said.
"Marley reorganized," he said. "It's by alphabet now, not by genre." Julie snorted. "Stop..." he warned her, though he was also laughing. "I know. It's crazy."
"A guy like you can't settle down with a woman who controls how you organize your CDs," she said. "What's she gonna do next? Go police your iTunes library."
John stared at her and said, "She means well. You know she does."
"I know," Julie nodded. "But she dumped you so it's my best friend duty to trash talk her all night. I don't make the rules."
"I'm pretty sure you always make up your own rules," he said. "It's why you're so dangerously fun to be around."
"I will take that as a compliment," she said, turning her attention back to the CDs. "Everything here is from the last decade..."
"That's because nobody buys CDs anymore," he said.
"Oh my god!" she squealed, grabbing something from the rack. She turned it around and revealed the CD for Crystal Army's second studio album, Where Did The Party Go?
John got one look of it and rolled his eyes.
"O-M-G, John Brown!" she teased, coming closer to him. "Please sign this for me! And my poster! And my breasts! I love you!"
"You can stop that now," he said.
"But it's just so fun," she laughed, looking down at the CD and turning it to the backside. "I really do love this album though. Even if I hated you guys, the music was still really good."
"I mean, I don't wanna brag," he said, "but I did take the lead on songwriting for that one."
"You are very underrated, my friend," she nodded, taking the CD out of its case.
"What are you doing?" he asked, sitting up.
"Getting the party started!" she exclaimed. "We are listening to this from start to finish because it is the least depressing album you guys have ever put out."
"Cause it was before the days of Prince of Darkness: Alex Zimmerman," said John.
At the mention of his name, Julie winced and said, "Ew, don't bring him up. Let's just listen to this 2018 Grammy-losing masterpiece and drink up. You ready?"
"Not for every track, Julie," he said as Julie put the CD into the stereo. "Play just one or two, jeez."
"I got it," Julie said, taking the remote and hitting two digits. "I haven't heard this one in forever."
She hit play and said, "Come on, get up!"
["A Little Less Sixteen Candles, a Little More "Touch Me"" by Fall Out Boy, or in this universe, 2017 Crystal Army.]
John was hesitant but Julie didn't waste anytime, reaching over the couch and pulling him up herself. As he spilled what was left of her beer, she pulled him to the empty space behind the couch and said, "Now sing!"
John rolled his eyes at her, but as his voice blasted through the speakers, he sang at the top of his lungs.
John: I confess, I messed up, dropping "I'm sorry" like you're still around. And I know you dressed up. "Hey kid you'll never live this down."
He shook his head at how silly this all was, but it was filling him with more energy than he'd had all week combined. He gave her a little spin and she danced as he continued to sing through Sam's part.
John: And you're just the girl all the boys want to dance with. And I'm just the boy using too many chances.
She hurried over to the kitchen and grabbed a bottle of tequila from the liquor cabinet and quickly rushing back to John, just in time for the chorus.
John: I'm sleeping on your folk's porch again, dreaming. She said, she said, she said, "Why don't you just drop dead?"
John pointed at her, indicating for her to sing along with him and she had no trouble doing so.
John and Julie: I don't blame you for being you. But you can't blame me for hating it. So say what are you waiting for? Kiss her, kiss her. I set my clocks early 'cause I know I'm always late.
As she handed him the bottle for him to open, she sang along a duet with his recorded voice. Jumping in place, she closed her eyes like she was at one of their concerts, just a stranger in the crowd watching them play.
Julie: Write me off, give up on me. 'Cause darling, what did you expect? I'm just off a lost cause. A long shot, don't even take this bet.
When she opened her eyes, John was already downing the tequila, straight from the bottle.
Julie: You can make all the moves, you can aim all the spotlights. Get all the sighs and the moans just right.
She pulled it away from him and he kept singing, wiping the corners of his mouth as she took a chug too.
John: I'm sleeping on your folk's porch again, dreaming. She said, she said, she said, "Why don't you just drop dead?"
Then she started spinning about, spilling alcohol here and there and not caring at all.
Both: I don't blame you for being you. But you can't blame me for hating it. So say what are you waiting for? Kiss her, kiss her. I set my clocks early 'cause I know I'm always late!
"Oh the vocal effect here is my favorite," she said as John was already starting to mimic the recording. She joined in, too, dramatically imitating Sam's voice.
John: Always on. Always on.
Julie: You said you'd keep me honest.
John: Always on. Always on.
Julie: But I won't call you on it.
John: Always on. Always on!
They both did air drums at the same time and then started dancing like crazy when the chorus started again.
Both: I don't blame you for being you. But you can't blame me for hating it. So say what are you waiting for? Kiss her, kiss her. I set my clocks early 'cause I know I'm always late.
Then Julie gulped more of the alcohol as John finished out the song, imitating his guitar as he strummed the last chord in the air.
John: I set my clocks early 'cause I know I'm always late.
***
"So what's that song really about?" asked Julie after they had settled down, sitting on the ground against the back of the couch continuing to drink the tequila from the bottle. "Or I should say, who is it about?"
"Quinn and Santana, I think," said John.
"What?" Julie laughed. "No it isn't."
"I wrote this one with Sam," said John. "And we were just kind of bouncing off ideas but... I figured out who the girls wishing him dead were when he came up with the title. Sixteen Candles... Quinn. Touch Me..."
"Santana," said Julie, laughing. "Wow. And here a part of me was always hoping I was his muse for even this one."
"He wrote some of them about you," John shrugged. "And so many that never made it on an album or even into a recording studio. Those years were... Weird."
"Aren't they all?" said Julie, taking the bottle from him. "I did kind of take inspiration from this track for Into You but... You'll never hear me admit that in public."
"A little less conversation and a little more touch my body," John nodded. "Yeah, I had made the connection before."
She took a big drink, handed him the bottle, then stood up again, stumbling a little.
"What are you doing now?" he asked.
"The party doesn't stop here," she said, turning up the music and reaching inside her shirt.
"Wait, don't," he stopped her. "Give the alcohol a little longer and then you can turn to that if you still don't feel the right kind of way."
"What is the right kind of way?" she asked. He didn't answer, but still she listened to what he'd said before and kept the cocaine tucked away. "Fine," she said, reaching down to take the bottle back from him. "But I'm gonna need a lot more than this."
She started dancing around again, while simultaneously pouring the liquor down her throat. "I got it covered," he said, getting up and heading for the cabinet.
***
"Amity, where are you?" asked Alex as he walked down the stairs at his house, with his phone pressed against his ear.
"At Kitty's," said Amity. "Is Julie with you?"
"No, I'm at the house," he said. "And she's not here. I thought she'd be with you. She was supposed to be with you."
"I know, but she left," said Amity.
"What do you mean she left?" said Alex, walking into his kitchen like Julie was just going to appear there.
"She just left," he said. "Alex, she's a grown woman, not a teenager. I'm sure she's fine."
"No, Amity, she's not fine," he said. "That's why I wanted someone with her. I've tried calling her and she won't answer me and she's apparently got some... Anyway I... I gotta go."
"Let me know if you—" she began, but Alex cut her off before she could finish, ending the call and sticking his phone in his pocket.
"Where the hell are you, Julie?" he murmured, looking around for any clues of where she could've gone.
***
As Julie continued to dance all around the living room and kitchen, John settled into the couch with a glass of Scotch and watched her. She had so much energy, in a different way than at the met gala.
It was like a whole other kind of high.
"Come on!" she said when she noticed him sitting down again. "Marley hasn't turned you into a complete bore, has she? Dance!"
She continued moving around to the current rock song playing from the stereo. She was euphoric.
John rolled his eyes but chugged the rest of his Scotch and stood up. When he took a look around, it hit him just how much he'd drank, before and after Julie's arrival.
He was still able to walk straight, but Julie was dancing a little crooked. "You're so fucking drunk," he laughed as he joined her.
"Dance!" she said, not caring.
As she laughed, he couldn't help doing the same. "I could really use some pot to slow me down right now," he told her.
"No slowing down," she shook her head and danced beside him. "You know you've always been good at this. You're a good dancer, a great singer. You just have to loosen up." She put a hand on his shoulder and attempted to make him looser.
"I'm loose," he told her, shaking her off, pulling her close by the waist, and then giving her a spin.
She laughed and stumbled saying, "Ok, now I'm dizzy as hell."
"Sorry," he said, chuckling as he stopped her from falling.
She regained her balance and said, "But you proved your point." He yawned and she said, "No, no way! No! Don't start flaking on me, John!"
"I'm sorry, I really am," he said. "I'm just tired."
"You slept most of the day!" she said, slowing to a stop.
"You're right," he nodded. "And I don't wanna ruin your night so..." He thought about it really hard and then said, "You know what? What the hell. Where is it?"
He looked down at her breasts and she smiled. "Yes!" she jumped up and down. "I knew you'd come around, buddy."
He put his hand out and she reached into her blouse, pulling out the little bag of cocaine. "I can only assume anything coming from Kara is really good," said John as Julie handed it over. He nodded towards the kitchen counter and Julie jovially followed.
Quickly, he grabbed her purse and pulled out her wallet. She watched, intrigued, as he did everything so expertly. She'd been doing it all wrong.
He pulled out one of her credit cards and she leaned in closer, saying, "I've always wanted to see how this is done."
He just laughed it off and poured out a bit of the bag. "You wanna cut it?"
"Can I?" she said, a little too excited.
He shrugged and handed her the card, so she gave it her best shot. "Go a little thinner," he instructed her.
"Like this?" she said, lining up the powder into sections.
"Perfect," he said. "Not bad, Jules. Not bad. You got any actual bills in your purse?"
She snorted.
"Right," he rolled his eyes and reached into his jean pockets. "I don't know where my wallet is. Give me a sec."
"Oh wait, here," she rushed to the fridge and pulled a couple of sticky notes left behind by Marley. "We can use these right?"
He stared at the notes, which had useless grocery scribbles on them.
"Or we don't have to," said Julie.
"No, it's fine," he nodded, grabbing them from her. "This works. Here. Take one and roll it up like this."
She imitated his actions until they each had little tubes. "Ready when you are," she said.
"Let's do it," he nodded and together they bent down and sniffed up as much coke as they could before it started to burn.
***
"Hey..." Bree took a seat next to Amity on the couch, a glass of wine in hand. "You still worried?"
"I already was enough as it is," said Amity. "But after talking to Alex... His worry amplified mine and now I'm freaking out. What if something bad happened to Julie? He seemed to think it would if she was alone. I just wish I knew..."
Bree took a gulp of her drink and then set it aside. "Ok, Amity. What's going on with them and, specifically, with Julie... It's out of your control. It's out of my control and... It's really out of Alex's control, too, at this point. He pushed her away and... Now he's facing the consequences of his rash decisions."
"It's not his fault, though, is it?" asked Amity.
"No," said Bree. "It's not. But... Our actions always cause reactions and... I don't even know where I'm going with this. Look, I'm worried about both of them too. But at this point... Julie's a big girl who can take care of herself. I'm sure she's not up to anything good but... She's gonna be ok. There's very little that you can't come back from."
***
"Alex is so going to kill me," said John from the bathroom.
"What?" Julie called out, as she jumped around on the couch, with too much energy that she now didn't know what to do with.
"He's going to kill me," he repeated as he stepped out. "Alex."
"He might," Julie said, shrugging. "But I don't think he'll care."
"Julie, he was practically at my throat the other day because he thought I gave you the E," he said, leaning against the wall. "Who did, by the way?"
"That's a secret," she said, laughing as she jumped.
He turned to the counter and asked, "Where'd it go?"
"Where'd what go?" she asked.
"The coke and the rest in the bag," he said, looking around for it.
"I took it," she told him. When he turned around, she pointed a hand to the her nose.
"All of it?" he exclaimed.
She slowed her bouncing to a stop and then stood unsteadily on the couch cushions. "The rest is back here," she indicated to her blouse. "But you were slowing down and I wanted to keep going so... I used what was still spread out."
"That's a lot for anyone, especially you," he warned her.
"I don't care!" she exclaimed. "I'm having a good time! Woo!"
"Ok, maybe you should pipe down a little," he said, walking towards her and reaching out an arm to stop her as she resumed her bouncing.
"No, stop it!" she said, but he pulled her down and she fell onto the couch, hitting herself with his knee on the way down. "Ow!" she laughed it off.
"Sorry, sorry," he said, quickly helping her sit up. "Just... calm down, ok? There will be more days to party." As she settled into her seat he asked, "So what's going on with you and Alex?"
"He doesn't want me anymore," she shrugged.
"What?" John asked.
"He told me so," she said. "He broke up with me."
"What?" he said again, scooting closer. "Are you serious?"
She nodded and said, "We could smoke pot, snort coke til we're completely numb, have sex, shoot a kitten, kick a baby... Anything we wanted to do. And he wouldn't give a damn. He realized that I'm not worth it. Sam realized it, Ryder realized it, Jake... And they all moved on. And Alex realized it too and one day so will my kids and—"
"Stop it, hey," he held back her hands as she motioned in the air wildly. "Stop. Don't say those things."
"Why not?" she shrugged. "Who cares?"
"I do," he said. "Because this is a party, not a funeral. Right?" Julie stared at him and shrugged again. "Ok, come on," he said. "Grab a bottle and come upstairs. I wanna show you something."
Julie groaned as he pulled her off the couch and said, "Please, nothing creepy."
"Nothing creepy," he assured her. She picked up a bottle of whiskey from the counter and followed as he led the way up the stairs.
As they passed up Kai's empty nursery, he shut that door and led her down the hall to the upstairs living room, where she looked around at how different it was since she'd last been up there. Marley really had done a number on the place.
John looked through the drawers in the back of the room and dug out a folder. "Ok," he said. "Come take a look at this."
"What is it?" she asked.
"Just look," he motioned her over. As she joined him, he pulled out several photographs and said, "That's us in guitar club."
"Oh my gosh," she smiled. "We were so little."
He moved the photograph and revealed another, where the two of them and Cory sat inside a kiddie pool along with a small beagle. "Aww, Rocky!"
"Rocky!" John repeated, celebrating the old dog briefly and then continuing on. They looked through dozens of old photos before John finally set them aside and said, "Feeling better?"
"I guess," she shrugged.
"Oh come on Julie," he nudged her. "You said it yourself. Screw Marley and screw Alex, right? Why should we let them make us feel like we're not worthy?" She didn't respond or even react so he added, "Because there are two people who thought we were worthy."
"Jake and Leila," nodded Julie.
He laughed and said, "I'm talking about the two of us. We're still here for each other after decades, Julie. If that's not love, I don't know what is."
She smiled up at him and said, "Thanks. I guess that's true." She took a big gulp of the whiskey and offered it to him but he declined. "Really?" she asked, surprised.
"Yeah, I'm actually good," he grinned, looking down at the pictures once again.
She looked at the clock on the wall and said, "Crap. I should go."
"Like this?" he said, shaking his head. "No way. You can stay here. I've got a lot of extra space."
"No," she walked towards the door. "I'll call... someone."
"With what phone?" he laughed, following her out and to the stairs. "I'll call a cab for you, ok?"
"Ok," she nodded, stopping by the bathroom. "I should probably fix myself up before I go out into the real world again."
"That's probably smart," John agreed, heading down the stairs as she went into the restroom. He looked around for his phone but couldn't find it anywhere.
Before he knew it, she was back downstairs and holding his phone in her hand. "Done," she told him. "Is it still raining?"
"I believe so," he nodded. "You sure you don't wanna just stay?"
"I shouldn't," she shook her head, walking towards the door.
They walked outside together, under just a drizzle. And in no time, the cab arrived. "I guess this is you," he said, opening up the cab's back door for her. He got one look at the driver and said, "Are you sure?"
"John," she laughed. "I really have to go home."
"I just feel weird about sending you off in a cab by yourself," he said. "In your current state."
"Sad?" she asked.
"Drunk and still a little high," he corrected her.
Julie looked at the cab driver, who was waiting and looked impatient. "Fine," she said. "Then come with me if you're so scared."
"I can't..." he said, rubbing the back of his neck. "I'm pretty drunk but... Not go home with you drunk."
Flustered, she said, "Oh John, I didn't mean—"
"I know," he smiled.
"Are you gonna get a ride or not?" asked the cab driver. "I'm not working these late shifts to eavesdrop on some chitchat."
"You don't have to listen in," Julie told him. She turned back to John and said, "And seriously. I'll be fine."
"Ok," he said, nodding and taking a few steps back.
She got the message and stepped forward, starting to get into the cab. As she gave her address to the driver, John began to walk back up to his door.
From the entrance, he watched her shut the door and ride off.
***
"Hey Marley," Alex paced his old bedroom in his parents' house, while Rosie slept soundly on the bed. "Thank you so much for returning my call."
"Yeah, you sounded upset in your voicemail," she said. "What's going on?"
"I wanted to know if you heard from Julie or John," he said. "Julie's gone MIA and I thought he might know where she is but I've been calling and he's not answering. I wanted to go by his place but I'm at my parents' house and they're at this gala thing and my sister left for the day and I can't leave Rosie and I'm just... I'm really worried Marley."
Marley took a deep breath and said, "I wish I could help but I don't know where they are. Either of them. I actually tried to call John earlier so he could take Kai for a while but... He didn't take my calls."
"Do you think there's any chance you could go down to his place and see if they're there?" asked Alex.
She didn't say anything but he could hear her shuffling.
"Please, I wouldn't ask you to reach out to him if I wasn't freaking out," he added. "And again, I'd go but... I have Rosie."
"Yeah, I know," she sighed. "Ok, I'll, uh... I'll go. I'll let you know."
"Thank you so much Marley," he said. "I'll be waiting." She hung up and Alex put his phone down. "Please be with him, Julie," he said, taking a seat on the bed next to Rosie. "Don't do anything stupid."
***
Julie had been home for about ten minutes when she heard a knock at the door. There was still a part of her that freaked out every time she had to open it, so she was slow to make it from the couch to the entrance.
But once there, she took a peak and saw that it wasn't anyone dangerous, at least not in the same sense that she was scared of.
"John," she said, opening the door. "You're... Did you drive?"
"I took a cab," he said. "I'm drunk, not dumb."
"Come in," she moved aside. "Or did you come just to make sure I had made it?"
"Actually, yeah," he said, stepping inside. "But I guess I didn't realize then I'd have to go back."
She laughed and shut the door, leading him to the living room. "I was just gonna lie down and try to ride off the rest of this high with a little bit of Scooby-Doo."
"Scooby-Doo, huh," he said, taking a seat on the couch. "Animated or live-action."
"Animated, obviously," she said, taking a seat beside him.
His pocket vibrated and he sighed, taking his phone out. "It's Marley," he said. "I should probably call her back at some point." He got a low battery message and said, "Actually, can I borrow a charger?"
"Yeah, sure," she nodded.
But she didn't move. "Where it is..?" he asked.
"Oh," she snapped back into focus. "Sorry, right. It's in my room. You can go get it. On the desk, connected where the lamp is."
"Got it," he said, standing up and stumbling on his way.
She laughed, watching him crash against the door frame and then listening as he struggled his way up the stairs. How he had made it this far, she had no idea.
After a few seconds of silence, she listened close for his return, but instead heard glass breaking.
"What the hell," she said, getting up and hurrying up the stairs.
When she walked into her bedroom, he was staring down at her now-broken lamp. "Oops," he told her.
She sighed, "What is it with you and lamps? You can't get drunk without wanting to touch one."
"I honestly don't know," he said. "Maybe it has to do with the fact that when I was a little kid, about three or four, a lamp fell on me. I was tugging at it and it just came down on me."
"Seriously?" she asked.
"No," he laughed. "But wouldn't that explain everything."
"Here," she said, reaching over the broken light bulb to hand him the charger end. "I'll clean this up in the morning."
He nodded and connected his phone to the charger.
"Are you gonna call Marley back?" she asked, sitting down at the end of her bed.
"I don't know," he said. "I don't think so. She's probably gonna... yell at me. Make me feel like crap again."
"Then I guess you probably shouldn't talk to her," Julie shrugged. "I'm glad I cracked my phone so I won't be tempted to reach out to Alex."
"Interesting..." he said, thinking about that. He pulled his phone from the charger and threw it at the wall.
It made a crack through the wall and fell down, shattering into a few pieces.
He laughed and she gasped, "John! What the hell!"
"I saw that going differently in my head," he said, walking over to the hole next to the closet.
She followed, looking at it from behind him and saying, "Damn it, John."
"I can fix that," he assured her.
"No you can't," she said.
"Yeah, you're right," he said, turning around to face her and leaning against the wall, blocking the hole. "But on the bright side... I won't be tempted to call Marley."
She forced a smile and they stared at each other for a couple of seconds before finally she said, "Thank you for tonight. I know I'm a little much..."
"No," he shook his head. "You're not. Alex couldn't handle it and that's his problem. It's not you. It's him."
"Yeah, right," she scoffed. "Good attempt. I almost believed you."
He shrugged. "Believe what you want but... I meant it."
She pressed her lips together and looked away. After a short but uncomfortable silence, she said, "Thanks anyway for keeping me company."
"Is that what it was?" he asked.
"That's the only word I can use that won't get us into trouble," she said.
"Any more trouble than we're already in?" he asked. She didn't answer so he said, "But I guess you might be right... Maybe I should go back home. Get out of your hair and... buy a new phone."
He stumbled past her and she followed as he headed out to the hallway, making sure he didn't fall down even though she was pretty out of it herself.
Scooby-Doo was playing downstairs and he stopped at the living room entrance, watching for a few seconds. "You're like... a Daphne," he told her. "Even now with your red hair gone."
"And you're a Shaggy," she said with a laugh. "But when you clean up, you're a total Fred."
"I don't know which one's the insult," he told her, walking towards the door.
"Both," she assured him with a laugh, opening the door. "Goodnight, John. Tonight was nice."
"It was," he agreed, stepping out. As he walked down the pathway and towards the gate, she shut the door and stood there, feeling like a completely different person, living a very different life all of a sudden. And it was comforting, the feeling that she could just transport herself into a whole other reality, or at least pretend to for one day.
As she began to walk back to the living room, there was a knock on the door once again and she rushed to open it.
John stood back there saying, "I don't have a phone to—"
Without warning, she pulled him in and reached up to kiss him. He could've stopped her and in fact should have stopped her, but he didn't do so.
Instead, he kissed her in return and walked forward with her, shutting the door behind him and leading her to the living room.
She whispered, "We shouldn't," then he responded, "I know," yet they still ended up kissing their way to the couch, standing in front of it.
As she quickly kicked off her pants and he took off his shirt, he stopped himself and watched her turn away from him. She seemed to be hesitating on removing anything else.
"We don't have to do this," he said as he walked up behind her and moved her hair from her shoulder, tugging at her blouse and kissing her bare skin underneath.
She closed her eyes and whispered, "We've already in trouble..." Turning around to face him again she asked, "Why stop now?"
John looked her in the eye as he walked closer to her, stopping when they were touching. He reached a hand up her shirt, searching for the bag of cocaine he knew was still stashed there.
She kept her eyes on him, completely enthralled as he found it, but took his time feeling around, pushing her body closer to his with his other hand.
"This is so wrong..." she said, putting her head down and resting her forehead against his chest.
He pressed against her like a hug, his hand still under the cup of her bra and bent down to whisper in her ear, "We can stop whenever you want."
She panted softly as he felt around, closing her eyes and saying, "I never said that."
But he did stop. He took the bag of coke out with him and looked down at it. "Come on," he said, turning away and walking to the staircase.
She walked behind him breathless. What am I doing? she thought. This is John. He's John...
But even as she tried to talk herself out of this, she walked up the stairs, following him to the point of no return.
When they walked inside the bedroom, he made room on the desk for the cocaine and spread out what was left in the bag. "Just a little boost," he said.
But she put a hand on his shoulder and pulled him back. "No... I don't think we need that."
He turned to her and she wrapped her arms around his neck, kissing him tenderly. But he didn't want tender, so he pressed against her harder, unbuttoning her shirt as she unzipped his pants.
With all the alcohol, cocaine and adrenaline in their systems he was surprised they weren't more clumsy but that was all probably wearing off now.
As he kicked off his jeans, he held onto her hips and placed her on the bed, leaning over her and kissing her stomach.
It'd been so long, for both of them, that all she could do was lie back and grab onto the comforter, feeling her back arch involuntarily as he kissed her inner thighs, inching up and up and up until she–
He pulled down her underwear and moved up, lying over her and reminding her, "Just say the word and I'll stop."
"Don't you dare," she told him, putting her arms around his lower back and moving his body right where she wanted him, speeding things up.
He smiled down at her and kissed her neck, pushing up his hips as his hands pulled down her bra, uncovering more places to kiss.
"Don't stop," she moaned, sinking her nails down his back and pushing him up while his lips opened up on her chest, kissing and tonguing and biting.
And even though a small part of her was screaming for her to stop, that this was all wrong, she couldn't remember ever feeling a rush quite like this before. And she couldn't stop it from happening all night.
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