With both kids passing out on the blonde as the four of them watched a movie Lena soon woke up to the site and could only smile. It was nearly 10PM and she was wondering if she should head home and let Stef be with her children or if she should just stay. Unsure of what to do she quietly turned the TV off as Stef opened her as as well feeling Frankie's head in her lap and Jude on her shoulder.
"What..what time is it?" she asked confused and turning her head to face Lena.
"MM past 10."
"10? Damm. Were you asleep too?"
"I was yeah. Seems none of us made it far in this movie." She laughed as it had been Frankie's idea to watch ,The Hobbit, trilogy but they barely made it passed the first hour of the first movie. Most likely it was attributed to their excitement of Stef being home as Lena felt it too. She was excited and during dinner she could not stop smiling at the blonde, something Stef had seen more than once smiling herself. "Let me straighten the kitchen a bit."
"Oh I can do that. You don't need to. Even if I am partly trapped."
"Yes I see that. They may never let you go ever."
Smiling at both kids the blonde gently ran her hands through Frankie's hair and hugged Jude a little harder.
"They really love you Stef. We all do."
"Yeah?" She asked looking to Lena who gently rubbed Judes back unable to look Stef in the eyes.
"Yes. We do."
"Even you?" she laughed as Lena looked into her eyes and shaking her head at Stef's humor.
"Yes even me silly. But let me put this food away so you don't have a mess for the morning." Watching Lena get up Stef's heart could only race a bit for she really didn't want her to go home yet. God she didn't for yes she wanted time with her kids and she knew she needed to plunge back into life but having Lena stay for maybe another night she didn't know how to ask. Was this part of recovery? Asking for help if you needed it even if Lena had done more than Stef could ever hope and wish for in the last month. Well in the last year if she was honest. How could she ask for more? How did she even have the nerve for the trip idea was spinning around in her head as well. There was no way she could keep asking Lena for any of this, but she, Stef realized she needed her and no part of her was using Lena. Never and she hoped the love of her life knew that.
Successfully being able to move Jude over a bit and rest him on the couch as well as moving out from under Frankie who slept like the dead she covered the two up and headed into the kitchen with Lena to clean up the Chinese.
"I think this apartment has never been so organized. Ever." Laughing the cop threw out some containers as Lena let out a smile. Yes she had organized Stef's cabinets and a few other areas including her closets but nothing too extra for she didn't want the woman to think she was taking over or invading her space.
"I didn't touch too much of your stuff."
"No it's ok. I appreciate it. Honestly Lena. I love how you organized things. Seriously." she said looking into her eyes as the slim woman let out a warm smile once again.
"You got a bunch of mail, some I opened on the phone with you but you have a few others that didn't look like bills."
"Ahh thanks. I'll sort through it tomorrow. I'm sure whatever it is can wait another night." Tossing some lomein in a glass container the two periodically glanced at each other but trying not to at the same time. Feelings never died they really didn't no matter what happened sometimes and it was no different with these two as Lena almost forgot what Stef's presence could do to her. Maybe in the beginning it really was only about sex, about fucking and not much more but so much had happened since that time. So many feelings had been tossed around, along with pain, hurt, anger, resentment, guilt, frustration, and love. Love, it was that last one that was sticking making this bond the two women had for each remain intact. Funny thing Stef had done way worse then Mike ever did to Lena, far worse but she didn't love him in this way. Not even close.
"Did you have a good time tonight?"
"I did Lena. It was nice to just hang out with you all and laugh. Been a long time. Ya know?"
"Yes. It has I agree." she said rinsing a few forks as Stef dried them.
"You know they really enjoy you."
"They are sweet kids Stef. You should be proud of them. Really proud and they were so supportive of each other when you were away.Frankie had her days and Jude had his."
"My sweethearts. You know I guess I didn't realize how hard it would be for them. You know me not being here."
"Well you are their mother and a big part of their lives and they love you Stef. They really love you and no matter what mistakes people make it doesn't mean we can't love and miss them. No one is perfect."
"I know. I think I'm still getting use to that love they have." Stef laughed as Lena smiled.
"They will keep giving it and showing it."
"I am really so proud of them. Judes report card blew me away and Frankie going to that Veterinarian internship soon. She's going to love it. The icing on the cake would be if Callie got herself together. Now that would be something." The blonde said smiling wide as Lena felt a lump in her throat for she had not planned on telling Stef just yet about Frankie.
"I was going to wait to talk to you about that."
"About what?"
Letting out a sigh Lena motioned for them to head to the patio as the blonde followed closing the door behind her and growing nervous.
"What's wrong?
"Nothing bad but Frankie is thinking of changing careers and dropping out of school."
"Dropping out? What? Why?"
"I don't know she mentioned wanting to go into law enforcement and brought home the civil service dates for the Sacramento Police Department."
"Wha...Wha..Why?"
"I don't know honestly. I talked to her about it and the thing is she loves the classes she's in even if she's struggling in some and was excited about the internship but she's not sure it's for her. I suggested she give it a chance first and can always decide later but she said she doesn't want you to waste anymore of your money on it."
"I don't give a shit about the money. I could care less about it. I know I haven't know her that long but she is so damm passionate about being a Veterinarian."
"Yes she is but you know how it is when you are young. Things can change. Or sometimes....
"Sometimes?"
"Sometimes we want to be like the person who we look up to so much that it can cause us to decide. Or maybe she really does want to do it. Maybe she feels too much pressure."
"Pressure from who?"
"I don't know love but I have to say she is very much like you in that factor for I couldn't get much out of her. But she hasn't dropped out yet because she still wants to finish out the semester but I don't know if she's going to register for the next one."
Taking a seat on the patio chair Stef let out a sigh as Lena sat beside her.
"22 is a hard age and I would hate to think she drops out because of money or thinking she needs to be like me. I want her to do what makes her happy Lena. I really do."
"I know you do and I could tell her that until the cows come home but she most likely needs to hear it from you."
"I don't want her to loose her way. She is so driven and focused."
"She won't Stef but we can help guide her and encourage her. Maybe take her to work one day so she can see what you really do and she can compare it to the Vet internship. Every problem or issue has a solution."
"Fuck you're an angel." The blonde said looking into Lena's eyes as they both smiled and the slim woman busted out laughing.
"So I've been told. But I care about them too Stef and want the best for them as well." She said now placing her hand on top of the blondes as she gently held it back.
"I know you do. I can see and and lord knows I love these babies but they are gonna make me nuts."
"Ha isn't that what they are here for?"
"Yes you may be right. They really are." Smiling the cop ran her fingers through her hair a habit Lena knew she did if she was rather stressed.
"Will you be ok tonight? I mean I didn't mean to spring that on you and..."
"No love. No. I want to know and these are the things I need to and will have to deal with. I'll be fine and I'm sure you're eager to get back to your own bed and your own place. Peace and quiet right?" She joked awkwardly really not wanting her to leave. God she would give anything for Lena to stay but she just didn't know how to say it.
"Peace and quiet is overrated." Lena joked back for she wasn't really ready to leave yet either. The slim woman had gotten use to being around both Frankie and Jude and never realized what she was missing in her life. Children. Even if Frankie was no longer a kid at 22 she was still young and Lena had enjoyed doing errands with her, meeting up with her for lunch at the diner and helping her study for her college quizzes and tests each night with Jude. Oh sweet Jude. She had bonded with him so much in the last month and realized he was a kind young boy as he told her about Noah, his summer camp, and daily middle school drama.
"I'm um, I'm not kicking you out Lena. I um...I just um...you have done so much and I don't want you to feel like I'm using you. Or that....
"Stef. I don't feel that way. If you would like me to stay for a few more days just ask me. You never have to beg. I'm here honestly and I figured you would need help re adjusting into everything and I do not feel like you are using me. I never did. Just ask me." she smiled as Stef felt so awkward and swallowing hard looking back into Lena's warm eyes.
"Can you? Can you stay through the weekend Lena? Frankie and I can bunk together on the pullout."
"Yes. I can Stef. That wasn't so bad right?"
"Oh yeah sure." She joked back and the two headed inside Stef feeling more grateful than ever.
As the night wore on and Lena headed to bed as well as Jude, Stef and Frankie shared the pull out but the cop couldn't sleep a wink. Deciding to start going through her mail while making a pot of coffee most of it was junk. However, one caught her eye that came from Michigan and was addressed to her in rather fancy handwriting. As far as she knew she didn't know anyone in Michigan and not thinking anything of it she opened it up and nearly fainted. She nearly fainted and her heart nearly stopped as she suddenly couldn't breathe. She couldn't breath for anything for it was a letter from her aunt. The aunt that she was told died 30 years ago. But if she didn't and if this was from her then that would mean ...what would that mean?"
"Mom you ok? Mama what's wrong?" Frankie asked but Stef remained silent unable to speak as the girl came up next to her gently holding her hand and noticing her mother was shaking and breathing heavy. "Mama what's wrong? What's wrong?"