—Present life. Coffee Town Cafe, year 2016—
A sound of a bell chimed over my head as I walked through the door, and I almost believed that my heart may have stopped for a split second.
After having to walk through the cold weather outside, my senses kept tingling for some reason. My skin and my hearings had become numb due to the freezing winter, and when that usually would have my mind wandering everywhere, I found myself getting more sensitive to sounds, to touches, and every other part of me had become a constant nerve-ending that I was always nervous and jumpy.
Thankfully, the comfortable warmth inside which immediately enveloped me allowed me to relax, and my senses awakened in a snap. I was suddenly enveloped by the humming noises of people chattering around me and the clattering of tablewares from every corner of the room. I took in a deep breath of air, breathing in the scent of coffee that I had been craving so much.
As I looked around the coffee place, I could soon find a pair of long slender arms waving up in the air to call me closer. The dishevelled brownish hair on his head popping out from one of the booths across the room. A light giggle instantly left my lips when my eyes landed on Taehyung, all wrapped in a dark coat and red knitted scarf covering his entire neck and a small part of his chin like a Christmas present wrapped in wools. His smile instantly formed a wide grin as he saw me coming over to join him.
"I haven't ordered anything for you yet," he told me then. "Didn't want the drink getting cold before you are here."
"Got it," I sighed as my bottom landed softly on the padded seat, before turning to look at the menu set above the counter. It took me a few minutes to order, and as I returned to the booth—my hot cappuccino in one hand and my coat hanging on my other arm—Taehyung was still all covered in his own coat. The only thing that was gone was his scarf, left discarded over his backpack next to him, while he placed both palms on the sides of his cup of hot coffee to gain more warmth.
"Are you okay?" I asked him as I pushed my things away and settled on the seat. "Cause—you know, this place is quite warm but you look like you're completely frozen solid for some reason."
He lifted his eyes at me. "I was doing fine earlier. I had to go around and do some errands before heading here, and out of nowhere some kids started throwing snowballs at me when I was passing through the park." He stopped, then he started grinning wide with mischief. "The next minute I was involved in a snowball fight against kids—" he chuckled, "I couldn't help it. But as I was winning, they pulled me down and buried me under the snow," he said, pouting.
"Serves you right!" I laughed at him, picturing the scene in my head which earned a glare coming from him instead.
"Hey, it's not funny," he barked, although his lips curled up to form a small smile at the end.
"I'm sorry." I lifted my hands as a way to surrender while trying to hold my laughter. "But I can imagine what happened so clearly in my head. You must've looked pretty stupid, honestly." I kept smiling as I pictured him playing in the snow. Taehyung had been so fond of younger kids, and he was much more playful than I had ever been. "I mean, of course, they'd do that. It won't be completely fair for them to try to defeat someone who is much bigger and taller."
"They started it first!" He defended himself, shaking his head with a wide smile before sipping his drink. The long exhale came out of him after he took a huge gulp from his mug, and at the same time, his body stopped shivering by the passing second. "Ah—" he sighed deeply, taking another sip and leaned back on his seat. "So—" he huffed, licking his lips to wipe the remaining taste away. "What's the plan?"
I blinked my eyes rapidly as I stared at him, slowly lowering my own mug after relishing the warm drink that had awakened my senses. "What plan?" I said to him, completely oblivious to what he had meant.
He smacked his lips together. "The plan for today? The reason why you asked me to come and see you, to the extent of even urging me to switch shifts with my coworkers. This sudden coffee date thing better be important," he said with curious eyes, twirling his fingers as he spoke.
"Oh, nothing much, really—" I shrugged nonchalantly. "I just missed you and thought we could catch up, share a bit of what has been going on our current lives since you have been so busy—" I lifted my mug and looked down to avoid his eyes as I continued, "—and also let you meet Jimin cause he wants to see you," I told him, rushing the words in one breath.
"What?" he asked.
I looked up to see his stunned face, trying to look somewhat indifferent. "What?"
"You said Jimin wants to see me?" He asked me, pushing on. "'The' Jimin?"
I could feel my cheeks getting warm, so I looked away again to hide them. "Yes, Taehyung. That Jimin."
He chuckled. And as I looked up straight at him again, I saw a smirk plastered on his face, before he started shrugging his coat off, finally, and crossing his arms over his chest. "I see," he mused while nodding his head. "But why does he want to see me?"
"I honestly don't know." I shrugged. "I mean, I mentioned about you in our conversations. And he's probably curious about my childhood best friend, who I talk about so frequently, and wants to know you better." I would never blame him, really. Jimin and I had been meeting each other more frequently and had started to get closer with each passing day, he must have been interested to know about the people I was close to.
He kept nodding his head playfully before curling his lips to another smirk. "What else do you talk about when you're with him? Have you figured out if he is the one we've been looking for?"
I kept my eyes on him as my memories trailed back and forth. I have been keeping things to myself lately, giving chance for the both of us to focus on our present lives and on our studies. But since he was the only one who knew about my predicament, I thought this would be the best time to let him keep up with my progress.
"Actually—" I gnawed at my lips for a moment, as I took some moments to recall some of the things I needed to tell him "I haven't been able to confirm it with him directly since—well, I have no idea how to bring it up or slip the topic in between our conversations—" my voice trailed in uncertainty and he curiously raised his brows. But before he had a chance to speak, I had already cut him off with, "—but I have been trying to confirm things that we have been sharing through our dates with any piece of memories I have of him. Like, you know, find the link in between. Who knows?"
"Memories?" His eyes widened, and he slowly leaned a bit forward until his upper body met the table to get closer to me. "What do you mean? Have you been—"
"—gaining more memories, yes. And it's mostly about him now. It's been happening since we've met." And everything else felt more vivid as they came to me.
Taehyung smiled at me. "So—are they good ones? Do they help?"
I only shrugged, too reluctant to give the details. "I don't know. Kinda? Mostly they are jumbled together like they usually do so I'm not sure." I started telling him parts of it—pieces of our conversations, which had happened either in my dreams and in our daily meet-ups, the little details from the way he looked at me or the touches he gave and how he made me feel when I was close to him, and parts of the random sequences that had been appearing in my dreams which I could only faintly remember as I woke up. "I mean, I could be just imagining things and want them to be real. For him to be real, so I don't want to put my hopes up too much. And I keep reminding myself what you told me about how I should just let things flow and see how it goes. And I'd have to say that it's helping me quite a bit."
None of it mattered anymore since now I was sure that I was not crazy, or that my brain was making things up. Because he was real, and the connection I felt between us was real. And even if those "memories" were made up images which my conscience had only created for my own reassurance, I knew that it was still worth a chance. He was worth the chance.
Taehyung did not speak for a while after, letting me drown in my own thoughts until—
"What about—" he stopped, biting his lips nervously while he sat there with his eyes on me. I knew he would be curious, but we also had a silent agreement that I would never give Jungkook any chance of being a part of my life. For a moment, I contemplated whether or not I should tell him the truth. That I had met the present Jungkook at the pub just a few nights ago. But how could I, when the memories of that man had also been coming to me more vividly, when our one chance of encounter had affected me so much already. His appearance had not only confirmed that he was close, but it had also awakened a part of me, something I had carried along with me on my mysterious leap. After all the effort that Taehyung had made, of everything he had done to eliminate every possibility of coming across to Jungkook with any way we could, it certainly had made me feel guilty to be keeping this from him, and to hide the one thing I wanted to do.
Out of all the things we had predicted would happen, there was one notion he made that had come true. Everything had been different. So many things around me were not how I remembered it, and it had been for other people that I had encountered as well. Both here in my present life, and the life I had recorded in my memory, one that was allegedly kept from my past life. But I was too afraid to share this thought to Taehyung.
Would it be worth it to tell him how there were certain things that I possibly could not change?
Would it hurt him if I told him how much I was still curious about seeing Jungkook again?
It took a moment before I decided that it would be better for certain things to be kept hidden. So I merely smiled at him as I reluctantly said, "I have been focusing on my classes and everything that's been going on with Jimin. I don't know, I haven't seen any sign of him appearing yet, but when he does—"
"You stay away from him," he said. His voice firm and still. "This is your second chance, not his."
There was something I felt in my chest when I heard him, but he was probably right anyway. I knew he was. But my curiosity won. "I know. Besides, he wouldn't even care about me if he doesn't know who I am, right?"
He chuckled. "Yeah, you're probably right," he said while laughing bitterly. I laughed along with him, while silently apologising to myself and to him for the lies I had given him.
We continued talking and laughing for a while until Jimin finally arrived. The bell had chimed a few times since we had first sat on the booth and had gotten completely lost in our conversation, giving signs of people coming and going from the coffee shop. But for some reason, the moment he became the one walking past the entrance, my whole body abruptly shivered. Even the sound of the doorbell seemed much louder to my ears.
I was sitting with my back facing the doorway so I was not able to see him as he entered. But I still knew. I knew that he was standing in the doorway as the bell had just stopped moving above him and the door behind him slowly closing. Taehyung was in the middle of talking about his new crush that he had just met recently, but my senses were already filled with Jimin's presence. I didn't have to look over my shoulders to see him, but I could picture everything in my head so vividly—his face, his soft hair, his eyes scanning around the coffee place as he searched for me, and then his smile as he found me. And I there was no need for me to look over my shoulder to know that he was already making his way over to our seat.
"Hello, sorry I'm late," he said as he reached our booth. His soft voice sounded like music to my ears, and I was filled with joy almost instantly. This had happened a few times, I have noticed, ever since the first day I met him. And I have gotten used to this indescribable feeling of how much he felt like home.
"Jimin," I greeted him with a wide smile, before sliding in my seat to give him space to sit next to me. "Uhm, so—" I looked over between Taehyung's amused grin and Jimin's warm smile before eventually introducing them, "Jimin, this is my best friend since birth, Taehyung."
"Hi," my best friend nodded with a smug smile, before extending his long arm to shake hands with Jimin, while the latter responded politely, "Nice to finally meet you."
"Likewise," Taehyung answered with a wink, which had me kicking his knee in return.
The minute Jimin's drink arrived, the small booth is filled with exchanged introductions by talking about each of our backgrounds, our choice of studies, and weird random questions coming from Taehyung aimed to both of us. I was completely nervous at first, yet ended up being amazed at the fact that Jimin was completely unfazed by Taehyung's joviality, and that things went so well from then on.
It was as if the three of us had known each other for years.
"—so yeah, that's pretty much why we haven't been hanging out together. I've asked ____ to join me once in a while, but her schedules are insanely packed with assignments and everything." Taehyung had been telling us everything about his recent activities in and out of campus. He had always had this deep fondness of children, which had led him to get a job at a kindergarten while studying, and had also led him to choose his current major at the university. He had been doing a lot of charity works for children with some of his peers in college, and that was also the reason why we have yet to spend time together as much as we used to.
It was hard to recall if this passion of his had always been there and if this was the reason why we drifted apart, and we never tried to figure it out. Except for that one time when I remembered seeing him walking away towards an airport gate and having memories of him travelling here and there, but there was nothing else I could remember of him. All we kept reminding each other was that no matter what would happen in this timeline, we would never let stray away from each other too far. And he would never let me face everything alone if all would fail.
"That sounds marvellous, actually," Jimin mused after listening to Taehyung speak about his work. "I'm always interested in those kinds of stuff."
"Join me next time, you can teach the kids some music or something. Or show them how to dance, if you want," Taehyung offered with a beaming smile. The thought of happy children did that to him.
Jimin gave him a nod. "I might actually do that," he said. "So, you're planning to focus on children once you finish your psychology studies, right?"
Taehyung gave him a frown but recovered quickly. "Well, I intend to."
"I think you'd do well at that," Jimin gave him a warm smile. "You're probably more excited about joining the volunteer work that the campus has been pitching about, right? I heard they're sending you guys abroad for that?"
Taehyung seemed taken aback at his statement, and he was not the only one. I only stared back and forth between them while he answered, "Uhm—yeah, I am. I'll be travelling to places with them, but I have just applied and probably won't be joining until next year. Wait, how do you know?" Taehyung's eyes flickered between me and Jimin. "Ah, did _____ tell you anything about it?"
With raised eyebrows, I stared at him and subtly shook my head, giving him a look which had him shooting a questioning glare. Both of us turned to Jimin who is in the middle of biting his cake without care, before he finally noticed our stares and smiled at us.
"Oh, of course, I'd know."
I glanced over at Taehyung who had his wide smile and curious eyes on me before I turned to Jimin. "I don't think I've told you about it, though. Did you find out about it from somewhere?"
Jimin gave a nonchalant little shrug and a sly smirk as he answered, "It's a secret."
The New Year was around the corner. Everywhere I went, I would see people getting ready to celebrate the moment. Flyers and posters were being spread around to offer different alternatives for people who wanted to join the festivities, the vibe of the parties was already in the air, and all I could hear was everyone planning on dates or events slipping in between conversations.
"Are you going to celebrate with your family?"
I was sitting in the cafeteria for a lunch break with Jimin sitting across the table. About a minute ago, Taehyung was here to talk about his upcoming work, while Jimin's classmate was here to talk about the New Year's Eve party being held nearby as he came to spread some flyers. We have yet to really have a chance to talk about joining any events, and I was considering about doing the same routine that I usually did to wait for the clock to strike at midnight.
"I'm supposed to," I shrugged, staring at him with a pursed smile when I noticed how he was staring at me with hopeful eyes, and I knew he was thinking of something else. "Do you have a better idea?"
His lips curled into a sly smile. "Me. I'm the better idea."
"Oh, are you?" I asked him, unable to hold back a giggle. His cute and adoring cheekiness were some of the perks that I have gotten used to deal with since we have gotten much closer, yet I was still easily amused each time that part of him came out.
"Why? Don't you think so?" He gave me a smirk, "But I'm serious. I want to spend New Year's Eve with you."
I could feel my face heating up and my heartbeat increasing. "What do you have in mind?"
"The two of us together, get some drinks and listen to some nice music, before I can take you to see some beautiful sceneries of the city and enjoy some fireworks," he said. "What do you say?"
I held my gaze on him, noticing the warm glint in his eyes and the fondness I had for him. Suddenly, there was nothing else I wanted more than to spend more time alone with him. Besides, how could I say no to that smile?
"I would love to."