I woke up before Oli and just looked at him. He was still half way down the bed, face down with his mouth open, kind of snoring and apparently still totally dead to the world. I was sad that Oli and I had to separate that day and live our own lives – him on tour, me modelling... even though it was only five days until I'd see him again. The time we'd spent in each others' company had made it clear to me that I wanted him around as much as possible so saying goodbye, even for a few days, really sucked. I stretched and messaged Behati and Hannah, wanting to tell them both the latest news; that Oli and I had exchanged the 'L' word... and maybe also that I'd done un-ladylike things in a nightclub bathroom. They were both happy for me and amused by the second part with Behati asking for all the dirty details, of course. At 9am I called room service and ordered breakfast for Oli and I even though he was still asleep. He would need it when he woke up so juice, toast, vegan scrambled eggs, fruit, and of course; coffee seemed appropriate.
I sat on the bed while I waited and rubbed Oli's head gently, letting his long, brown hair glide between my fingers. I didn't want to wake him up, but I knew I had to once the food arrived anyway. He groaned after a couple of minutes and opened one eye to look at me after a while. "Hello sleeping beauty." I whispered jokingly. He groaned again and sat up awkwardly.
"Fuck." he said as he grabbed his head, the hair on one side completely flat, the hair on the other, fluffy and sticking out. I guess this was why he often slept in a beanie. "Here, drink this." I said, reaching over for the glass of water/aspirin/hydration powder and handing it to him.
"Ugh." he whined, scrunching up his face as it hit his taste buds. "Do I have to?" he asked like a child, clearly unimpressed with how it tasted. I mean, it wasn't great, but it wasn't that bad.
"Yes. It will make you feel better." I replied. He reluctantly sculled the liquid while I went and got a face washer soaked in cold water. I climbed back onto the bed and sat with my legs wide and told him to lay in front of me which he did, his head resting against my, well pelvis. I put the cool washer across his forehead and started massaging his head to comfort him a little bit and he moaned a little as I pressed my fingers into his temples. I loved running my hands through his hair and I liked taking care of him to be honest. I didn't have that kind of connection with many people in my life. "I didn't think I drank that much last night but fuck I feel terrible." he admitted as he laid there with his eyes shut.
"I didn't think you drank that much either to be honest, but here we are." I giggled. He opened his eyes and looked up at me. I think he appreciated that I was there with him, trying to make him feel less horrible. "I love you." he said with a smile, probably suddenly remembering what had happened the night before and realising that he could say it openly now.
"I love you too." I replied, leaning my face down to kiss him upside down.
Oli was leaving with the band at 11am to drive a couple of hours to Norfolk, then travelling overnight to Atlanta, followed by Jacksonville and finally finishing up the tour in Orlando where I would be reuniting with him. I felt bad that he had to play four shows in five days and had to sleep for two of the nights on the bus, meanwhile I would be in New York in my warm, comfy apartment earning my living by attending parties. I guess it was the life he was used to, but it seemed kind of unfair that he was on the go so much, having to have energy every night to perform. As the doorbell rang, I slid out from under Oli's head and answered the door, then watched as our breakfast was wheeled in on a big silver trolley. Oli stumbled over to the table and plonked down as I started removing the covers and pushing plates in his direction. "Thanks for looking after me." Oli said as he sipped the coffee that I handed him before anything else. "I wish you could be on tour with me all the time." he laughed. I just laughed as I started throwing grapes in my mouth. We sat and ate breakfast together as I filled him in on some of the gaps he had of the night before. He remembered most of what happened and blushed when I told him how 'hands-on' he'd been. He also told me it was 'so hot' that I'd given him a blowjob in the toilets, lol. Whatever floats his boat, I guess. I messaged Luiz while Oli showered and we packed our bags ready for our separate departures. I knew it was only five days, but I still hated saying goodbye. Being with him for a few solid days had been so nice and it made it feel like five days was going to be forever.
As we stood in the lift with our suitcases, I hugged him tightly. "It's only five days." he whispered as if he knew I was feeling sad about it.
"I know. I'm just being clingy." I said looking up at him. He chuckled and squeezed me tighter. "Send me lots of selfies so I can see your beautiful face, OK?" I said playfully.
"OK." he said, kissing my forehead as we reached the ground floor. Everyone was already there as we arrived, scattered around the lounges, looking at their phones. Oli squeezed my hand as we walked over to the group and Luiz came and took my suitcase from me. "Our car's here already so we should get going." he said as he took my suitcase toward the door and awaiting driver. I didn't want to leave. "Well guys, I had so much fun with you guys the past couple of days. Thanks for having me. I'll see you in Orlando." I said quickly to everyone. They all jumped up and gave me a quick hug, then of course Oli put his arms around me and squeezed me tightly. "Have fun back in New York. I'll see you in a few days." he said.
"I will, but it won't be the same without you." I replied as I let go of him. I waved goodbye to the others as Oli took my hand and walked me to the car where Luiz was holding the door open for me. "I love you." Oli said as I stopped and turned before getting in. I kissed him quickly.
"I love you too." I replied. Luiz thanked Oli for everything with a quick goodbye hug and jumped in behind me, then we were off; on our way back to New York and back to the life I had almost forgotten even existed while being with Oli the past few days.
As soon as we were back in New York, I went straight to Luiz's hotel. We dropped off our bags and went for lunch at a restaurant close by before coming back to meet my stylist. I was off to the store opening of an luxury luggage brand called 'Rimowa' on Fifth Avenue, a brand that I'd modelled for and was ultimately now attending the party as their guest of honour. My stylist put me in Versace and fairly natural hair and makeup, and my night mostly involved mingling and posing for photos in practically every possible centimetre of the store. I didn't drink a lot and I made my exit around 10pm, heading back to my apartment for a good nights sleep. I sent a couple of photos to Oli and he video called me since he was waiting to get on the tour bus for the 8hr trip to Atlanta. I felt bad for him, but he didn't seem bothered. We didn't chat for long, but he wished me sweet dreams and I was happy to have seen his face before going to sleep. I missed him being in my bed... it felt empty now, but I fell straight to sleep anyway. The following day I went to the salon to get my hair done – as well as a pedicure and manicure since I was due for one. It was nice to relax and feel pampered and I used the time to try and think of what I would get Oli for his birthday which was now only six weeks away. I thought about jewellery, but he didn't really wear it, then I thought about trying to write something for him, but since he was a songwriter, I thought I would just embarrass myself... I couldn't think of anything. We were going to be in Tokyo for his birthday, so maybe I could try and find something special to do while we were there? Maybe I'd message Micky or Jordan and ask for their help.
After a chilled out day, I headed to Luiz and my stylist for yet another round of getting glammed up; this time for the Vogue Fashion Fund Awards. I chose to go kind of natural again, but with a long black gown since it was Vogue. I met up with a handful of other models that I worked with and I spent most of the night between them and Luiz, chatting and posing for photos. I once again sent photos through to Oli and he replied to them all saying how beautiful I was. He knew how to make me feel special and loved even when he was miles away. Once again, I didn't drink a lot, even though it was tempting being at such a huge, a-list party and I headed home at around 1am. I sent a goodnight message to Oli and he was still awake so replied to it, and he also sent me a stupid meme of a picture of two beans that said "I've BEAN thinking about you.". It was so lame, but I loved that he sent it to me. I returned the gesture with one I found of two pears that said "we make a great PEAR." and I could see his smile in my mind as he replied with laughing emojis. We were so silly, but I loved going to sleep with a smile on my face, even if it was from a silly set of memes.
I spent the day off shopping with Hannah and lunching so she could talk about wedding ideas. I was happy to listen and help with anything I could and if I'm being honest, the idea of planning a wedding seemed like so much fun, though a lot of work. I went to the gym at my apartment complex to run on the treadmill and also did some weights training with help from an app on my phone... I had an event with the lingerie brand the following day so wanted to look my best. I sent a sweaty gym selfie to Oli, making sure my boobs looked great of course, and he replied with a wide-eye emoji and the letters 'O M G' all sent as separate messages. I knew he would find it sexy and I just laughed at him. Maybe it was mean since he couldn't have me, but maybe it would be good for him to want what he couldn't have for a few days. I called him on my way back up to my apartment and he called me a tease, lol. He was still in Atlanta and had spent the day with the guys just chilling out in the hotel pool, shopping and looking around the city. We actually both had that particular day off so we could have met somewhere if we wanted to, but I guess considering it was only a couple of days until we were together, it wouldn't have been worth the extra travelling. We were on the phone that night for about two hours, Oli telling me all the things we were going to do in Sheffield the following week and the things that he wanted to show me. He seemed really excited about me going and I guess I was excited too, although a little nervous. He had organised dinner and a night out with the guys and their girlfriends, and I was absolutely ecstatic knowing I was going to see them again. He'd also organised for us to meet Tom for lunch since he was apparently excited to see me again too, and he was super excited to get to see his dogs. I thought it was cute how much he wanted to get back to his 'normal' life, though it was hard for me to understand because I didn't ever have that connection to a place. I felt like I'd never really had a solid home anywhere or family that really anchored me to one place. After lots of discussion and planning, he let me go so I could get to bed, ready for my last day in New York before I was seeing him again.
I spent a good portion of my last Oli-free day in gym gear, being photographed and yelled at to look at cameras. Sounds strange, but the lingerie brand was launching a new active wear collection that I was one of the faces of, so I was working out in front of a bunch of photographers with two other insanely beautiful models. It was then a photo call at the brand's flagship store on Herald Square, so more photographers and media, followed by a TV spot with 'Extra' talking about what we eat and how we keep fit. Of course I praised my vegetarian diet, running and yoga, but I definitely thought the amount of sex I had with Oli probably also helped. I went to dinner with the models and a few other people from our team and we got caught by the paparazzi as we headed home, but I was too excited about packing my suitcase and going to Orlando to care. I was getting two entire weeks with Oli, seeing his final show in Orlando tomorrow night, exploring Universal Studios for two days, and then there was the nine days I would spend with him at his house in Sheffield. Once I was home, I started throwing clothes onto my bed and I sent Oli photos with excited happy emojis. It was 9pm when he obviously finished his show in Jacksonville because my phone started buzzing as he started replying. He said he'd call me when he got to the hotel and he did, video calling me about half an hour later. He was on his bed shirtless and I'd be lying if I said I was jealous I wasn't there. "Ohh, you're sexy." I gushed. He just laughed.
"Yeah? You think so?" he questioned. Was he mad?
"Uh, yes, duh! You're making me all hot and bothered." I replied playfully.
"Says the one who sent me like fifty sexy photos in the past few days." he chuckled. I guess that was true. After drowning each other in compliments, he told me that he'd organised a car to pick me up at the airport when I arrived, and after a quick run down of how our days had been, we said our goodbyes and headed to bed; eager for it to be the next day. I was glad it was the last night I had to be alone, and the last time for a while I had to cuddle a lifeless pillow rather than the gorgeous, tattooed body of my beautiful man.