"Hey, Shawn!" Some girls waved and giggled from across the street.
Shawn smiled at them and crossed the street to take photos.
Crystal kept walking, their 3-month old baby held in her hands. She tried to smile at his fans or at least keep a straight face but it was becoming harder to do.
After a while Shawn came back to stand beside her. "Sorry, babe. Where did you say you wanted to go?"
"I wanna go home." She said emotionlessly.
Shawn immediately sensed that there was something wrong. "Are you sure? I thought you wanted to have a family date?"
"Look, I said I just want to go home, Shawn." She snapped, catching Shawn off guard.
"Is something wrong, Crys?"
Crystal didn't even answer. She huffed and glared at Shawn for being difficult before she turned in her heels to walk back to their parked car.
She didn't hear Shawn catch up to her which made her cheeks burn with anger. She honestly felt like she was about to cry.
Once she reached the car, thankfully Shawn gave her the keys earlier, so she unlocked it and began strapping baby Mel to her car seat. She didn't turn around because she knew Shawn wasn't there; he probably got caught up by another fan.
Once she finished strapping Mel, she sat on the passenger seat to wait for Shawn. She was really mad but had to keep it in.
A little over five minutes later, Shawn appeared in view and sat in the driver's seat.
"Sorry, we reached the cafe you said you wanted to go to. I went as quickly as I can. I got you your drink." He smiled holding up two cups. He wasn't stupid; He knew something was wrong. He thought he could lighten up the mood if he brought her coffee because he knew she's been tired lately. This was also the drink she craved when she was having Mel.
Crystal didn't respond or look at him. She leaned her head on the window and looked straight ahead.
"Here you go, my love." He attempted to shove the drink in her hands and kiss her cheek but she dodged that too.
He was content enough that she accepted the drink so he cleared his throat and began driving home.
The drive was quiet. Crystal occasionally sipped her drink. Shawn hummed, trying to stay positive. Mel slowly fell asleep to her father's humming.
Once they made it home, Shawn told Crystal that he's got Mel and that she can start heading up.
The family rode the elevator in silence, though Shawn still hummed to keep Mel asleep.
Inside, Shawn went straight to Mel's room to put her to bed while Crystal headed for their bedroom.
After putting Mel in her crib and making sure she's asleep, he came in to his and Crystal's bedroom to find her crawled up in her side of the bed, her back facing him.
Shawn took off his coat and slid under the covers to spoon Crystal. "Hey,"
Crystal didn't respond. She pinched her eyes shut as the tears finally escaped.
"I'm right here, love. Talk to me." He spoke again in a whisper and kissed her neck that was exposed to him. Shawn spun her around to face him and she let him. "Tell me what's wrong."
"I just—I don't know... We were supposed to have a family date and there's these girls." Crystal hiccuped and opened her eyes to look at him.
Shawn smirked and leaned down to whisper in her ear. "Is my baby jealous?"
Crystal glared at him and hit him in the arm. She went to turn her back at him again but Shawn apologized and held her to keep facing him.
"I just—" Crystal sighed. "Now that I had a baby I feel so old and ugly now. And you, girls still come at you even when you're with me."
Shawn looked at her dead in the eye. "You are not ugly."
"But I'm that girl who got pregnant before getting married. Everyone thinks that's kind of ugly."
"When did you start caring about what everyone else thinks?"
Crystal locked eyes with Shawn as if trying to say an unspoken message. When he didn't get it, she decided to let her pride down and tell him. "I just feel like everybody's still trying to steal you away from me. I'm that young mother that nobody will ever want and you're still that hunky bachelor— or whatever they call you these days." She avoided his eyes and picked at the buttons of his shirt.
"I want you though, isn't that enough for you?"
"Of course it is! But that's not what I meant. What I'm trying to say is: people think you're going to leave me because you can."
"And that's what you think too?" Crystal nodded, still not looking at his eyes.
"Hey, look at me." She did. "You and Mel are my world. You two own my whole heart and there is nothing in this world that will make me fall out of love with you. I'm so in love with you, Crystal Paige. I will always be in love with you. Do you understand now?"
Crystal smiled but didn't show her teeth. She nodded and kissed his chest. He pulled her closer and rested his chin on the top of her head.
Crystal was assured but she didn't entirely get the talk she wanted to have. There was still a burning question in her heart: Does he not want to marry me?
————-
it was 3 in the morning. Crystal was beyond exhausted when she got home. Mel had been up at 1am— crying non-stop. Crystal finally got her to sleep by putting her in the car and driving around the neighborhood.
When she got home, she put Mel in her crib that was now placed in hers and Shawn's room. Although extremely tired, she had noticed that her bed was empty.
Shawn's still not home?
She went out into the kitchen to make herself some coffee. Then she sat on the living room couch just sipping her coffee to wait for Shawn.
Another hour later, it was 4 am and Shawn finally stumbled in the apartment. Crystal was seething with anger. She watched as Shawn tired to tiptoe around the place—obviously not wanting it to be known that he had just got back.
"Where we're you?" Crystal spoke up.
Shawn jumped, surprised. "Oh sh.it. I didn't know you were up, babe." The tuxedo he was wearing wreaked of alcohol, smoke, and women's perfume. Crystal got a whiff when he leaned in to kiss her cheek.
"Another party I wasn't invited to?" Crystal continued to talk.
"I'm sorry, baby. It was just for the press. The after party of the Juno's just took longer than expected. I missed you though." Shawn slurred and lazily wrapped his arms around Crystal's waist.
He peppered Crystal's cheeks and neck with wet, sloppy kisses. Shawn was a hor.ny drunk when he's drank way past his limit. He softly wrapped his ringed fingers around Crystal's hair and began working on a mark on her neck.
"Shawn, you're drunk. And, you drove here?" Crystal pushed him off her.
"W-wasn't far. Don't worry, babe." He tried to reach for her when she walked away towards the kitchen.
Crystal got him a glass of water once they were in the kitchen—hoping to sober him up enough to have this conversation.
"Shawn, you could've died! What are Mel and I going to do if you died?! You have a family now, Shawn. You should be thinking about this stuff before you even thought about drinking tonight."
"I'm sorry, Crys." He sat on the kitchen counter in front of Crystal sipping his water. It seemed to be sobering him up the slightest. He held his head in his hands and massaging it.
"And you smell like girl's perfume."
"It's not what you think, Crystal, ok? I took some pictures with other guests and you know they wear expensive perfumes." He was beginning to become frustrated with all her questions. His head was pounding and he just wanted to go to bed.
"Do you know what time it is, Shawn?! Its 4 in the fuc.king morning!"
"Shhh, Crystal. You're going to wake Mel. Can't we just talk about this in the morning. Im fuc.kin tired." He stood up abruptly causing the chair he was sitting on to screech.
"You're tired?! I haven't slept in days while you're galavanting until 4am, Shawn. I was driving around in circles to put your kid to sleep for the past hour. She's been crying for her father since two in the morning. And, you make me wait for another hour for you to come stumbling home drunk!" Crystal yelled pointing fingers at Shawn.
"Oh please, Crystal. I'm not 'galavanting'. I'm making money for this family. I'm sorry I came home late one time!"
"One time?! What about the months you're out on tour?" Crystal walked around to stand in front of Shawn.
Shawn had taken off his tuxedo jacket and his shirt was no longer buttoned all the way up. "I can't help that, Crystal. I'm working. Are we really arguing about my job again?"
"I'm not arguing with you about your job, Shawn. This is about you not making us your priority. You can't even take time off to be with your daughter?"
"Take time off touring, Crystal? And then what? How are we going to pay for the house you said you wanted? Just because you gave up your career doesn't mean I have to give up mine."
Crystal could not believe that he just pointed out that she was no longer being booked for movies or anything. Crystal—angry and tired— pushed at Shawn's chest. "I gave up my career for you and you're just going to rub that in my face?! Shawn, I've been acting since I was 6 years old! I threw away almost two decades of work for you. So don't yell at me about not working, Shawn!"
"I DIDN'T ASK YOU TO GIVE UP YOUR CAREER FOR ME, CRYSTAL. YOU MADE A CHOICE! I chose to keep working so we can pay for this apartment and for the house you want! " He yelled back.
There were tears leaving Crystal's eyes. "You were the one that wanted to keep the baby even after I told you we weren't ready. And you come telling me that I chose to throw away my career!"
"So you'd rather abort our child who is now sleeping in the next room than give up your 'almost two decades' of show fuc.king business?!"
In between Shawn's words Crystal had walked over to stand in front of Shawn. SMACK! Crystal's hand collided with Shawn's cheek in a harsh slap. Shawn looked livid and Crystal was crying.
"Yes, there was a time I thought about aborting her because I knew the damage it'll make on my reputation. But not anymore, Shawn. How could you think of me like that?"
Shawn was gripping the kitchen counter to suppress his anger towards Crystal at the moment.
"You're right. I did chose my child over my career. You didn't tell me to do that. Because unlike you, I prioritize my kid before anything else. Before my career, my reputation, even my relationship with you."
"Our relationship? What the hell do you mean by that?"
"It means: I've been sick and tired of women throwing themselves at you during 'work' and I've been choosing not to say anything for the sake of our child!"
Shawn scoffed. "I understand now. You want me to give up my career because you think I'm going to cheat on you?"
"You're sick, Shawn! I can't believe you! I'm angry at you because I'm the one raising a baby alone while you enjoy the attention you get because there's no fuc.king ring on you finger."
Shawn's breath caught in his throat for a moment but because he was still a little drunk he kept his pride up. Crystal has never brought up getting married. Ever.
"Crystal, the whole world knows I have a kid with you."
"Right. But you can't even convince me that you're committed to Mel and I, so what makes you think the rest of the female population believes you won't leave us for some other pretty model?"
"So is marrying you gonna solve this problem?" He says nonchalantly. He stared at her in the eye, dead serious but his chin up in the air.
Crystal scoffed and almost turned into a laugh. "No. No its not, Shawn. I can solve this problem when I put the time and energy on my kid instead of on a relationship that's going nowhere." Crystal turned on her heel and headed straight for Mel's bedroom.
Shawn was still trying to process what she said when Crystal was gathering Mel's stuff. She brought the stuff to the master bedroom, pulled out a suitcase from under the bed, and placed the stuff inside.
After a minute Shawn followed her into their bedroom. He watched Crystal shove things in a suitcase. He was still in shock and only processed what was going on when he noticed Crystal was only packing filled bags and pouches. Shawn realized that Crystal must've pre-packed their stuff awhile ago to make leaving as fast as possible.
"What? What're you doing?" Shawn was alarmed at the sight of Crystal packing Mel's toys and diapers. Crystal couldn't respond through her tears and sniffles. "No, no, no, no, no! Crystal, stop please. No! Don't take her. Don't leave me!"
Mel began stirring in her crib at the commotion her father was making. Tears began escaping Shawn's eyes while he tried to take the things out of the suitcase.
"No! Crystal, please stop! I'm sorry, okay! I'm sorry! You were right!" He tried to grab her arm to get her to look at him. But she yanked it back.
"Crystal, you're not breaking up with me right? No! You don't mean it! Tell me what to do! I'll do anything, please. Just don't leave!"
Crystal zipped up the suitcase. She was fighting hiccups when Shawn was still holding on to her hand.
"Okay! Here! Marry me. Crystal Paige, marry me, please." He was down on both his knees holding on to Crystal's arm for dear life.
"I'll stop touring! I'll just make money through ads or something. I'll make music from home and I don't know! I'll whatever the fu.ck you want. Just please, don't leave me." His face was red from crying. Tears left a stream on his cheeks while more escaped. "I'll marry you right now. Please! I love you!"
Mel began crying in her crib, not amused that she was woken up. Crystal's heart was heavy at the sight of him on the floor but she had to think of her daughter first before herself.
"No, Shawn. I'm not marrying you like this. I'm done." She said and broke free from his grasp on his knees.
She walked over to Mel's crib and rocked the angry baby in her arms.
"Melody, baby? Daddy's here. Don't cry. It'll be okay, honey."