Empire

Chapter 15

Chapter 15

Lux's Point of View

It's been forty eight hours since I must have suffered from a stroke or a brain aneurism. That's the only logical explanation I can come up with for surrendering my virtue to a self-absorbed ass. I slept with Chuck Bass, my brother like best friends, best friend. What have I done? It's five in the morning and here I am frantically alphabetizing the books on my book shelf, because I can't sleep without thinking about him, and his hands on me no matter how nice it did feel...Stop it...Lux, he's a jackass. I hit my head with a book and lay back on the floor in my room. My mind has been in an epic tailspin since that night.

I can't even begin to comprehend what the hell was going through my mind when I let him kiss me. He was being so nice and sweet and human, that I let my guard down. I should have just stopped it after that amazing kiss, but I couldn't. I didn't want to. I still have a sore spot on the inside of my lip where he bit down on it. I ran my tongue over it. I always imagined I'd lose my virginity to a guy that loved me and that I loved back, not Chuck freaking Bass.

At least he's a total jerk who will probably pretend it never happened. Oh god, what have I done...the entire time he was kissing me I knew we should stop, but I just couldn't. I've never felt anything as exhilarating as that. Chuck was such a gentlemen though, making sure I was okay the entire time we were together. I've seen sex in movies, it's supposed to be this magical experience and it was, but no one tells you how awkward it is afterwards and how painful it is. I'd dug my nails into the side of Chuck's neck when we were...There's a sign that read's idiot flashing in my mind right now.

I got up and decided to go for an early morning run to try and clear the images of that night from my mind. I can still feel the warmth of his hands as they caressed my body. After I pulled on a black zip up hoodie I headed towards Central Park and ran until all I could hear was my heart beating in my ears. When I'd completely exhausted myself I wondered around the city, even though I was drenched in sweat and probably looked disgusting. Blair had given me the third degree when I stumbled home at three in the morning. I told her I was with Chuck at Victrola, I just left out that we slept together...

I walked slowly down the sidewalk, trying to calm my heart rate before it exploded in my chest. The cool morning air hit me sending a shiver down my spine. I brushed some wet hair behind my ear and looked at the cracked buildings as I went by.

Tonight's Blair seventeenth birthday party, even though she doesn't technically turn seventeen for a week and half. Koti scored her brothers apartment downtown for the night and has planned this gigantic party. Nate hasn't returned any of my phone calls or texts. Blair told me that Jenny came forward and revealed that Nate had mistaken her for Serena at the masquerade ball and confessed his "love" for Serena to her. Jenny's been kicked off the minion roster as of right now. She said the Captain was pushing Anne's ring on her and Nate and how they would be together forever, that's when she confronted Nate about everything. It didn't end pretty...

Apparently the Captain was arrested the night I lost my mind and is now under investigation for embezzlement and fraud. It's all over the papers. We knew something was wrong, but I never imagined it was anything like this. I guess it's true what they say when it rains it pours. I'd just past St. Mary's Church when I noticed a black town car pulling up alongside me. The window rolled down and he appeared with his crooked smile. I continued to walk, blocking him out of my mind. He wasn't there.

"Well, look who it is. If I knew any better I'd say you were avoiding me." Chuck spoke from the car as I bit my lip and kept my head forward.

"Go away, Chuck. I'm not in the mood for this." I snapped out, looking at him harshly.