Chapter 7

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As much as I love to argue, I really hate arguing. What if I don't have an opinion? What if I don't want to choose a side? What if either side could be right, and in the grand scheme of things, no one cares who the winner is? Why should I be forced to defend my side on any random debate you throw at me? What if I don't GIVE a freaking rip? Why can't my side just be right because I want it to be? Why should I have to prove it to you? Why should I care what you think? Honestly, I DON'T care. I only care because you won't freaking leave me alone about my ideas. You won't just let me believe in my fantasies. You tell me there has to be an explanation, and if there isn't, it isn't true. Why do I care what's true? The truth doesn't set me free if it isn't what I want it to be. Yes, knowing my ideas were correct can be a major relief, but if I'm wrong? I don't want to know about it! I'm happy with my delusions. Without them, my life has no meaning.

I don't want to live a meaningless life. What would I do? My career wouldn't matter, so long as I was living. My friends wouldn't matter, so long as I had somebody around to keep me happy. I could watch movies and point out all the impossibilities; I could harp on dreamers and tell them they don't make any sense; I could spend my entire life telling everyone else why they're wrong: for the same reasons I'm wrong. We don't have any proof. Proof? Who gives a freaking flip about proof? People believe things because they want to, not because it's been proven to be true. I can be taught all the truths of the world, and not believe any of them for the simple reason that I just don't dang like them. Sure, I know why those things are true, and how, but what do I do about it? I start looking for exceptions. I want it to be wrong. I don't want to be told I'm wrong because what I believe in works in my favor. Maybe what you believe in works for you, but why force that on other people? Why should you tell them they're wrong and you're right?

Because you are lonely. You want someone else to believe in you. Or maybe, you see someone that is upset. They've stopped believing in their heart and you can't stand to see them so disturbed, so you offer up a comforting explanation that can take the pain away. You give them a chance to believe in the thing that makes you happy, and eventually, they feel better. Are they delusional? Are they stupid? Are they gullible and misguided? No! They're happy for goodness sake! They found something to believe in that you dimwits just can't handle. They aren't stupid. They know why you accept your scientific ideas and why you insist that you are right. They might even fight it for a while, hoping you will get the point: they have something to live for. Whether it makes sense or if it's even "true" by your standards or the standards of the universe, if it's real to one person, then it's real. To one person. Everyone of us, is one person.

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