Unhinged ☾ TEEN WOLF {4}

Don't Give Up

I think I wandered through the woods for a few hours. It was still dark, and the moon hadn't moved much. It was the one thing I could focus on intensely enough to keep walking. I wasn't sure where exactly I was walking to until I ended up on the edge of the woods near Derek's loft.

He probably wasn't there, but at least I could hide somewhere for a while. I started walking up the steps of the building. By the time I reached his floor I felt completely drained of energy. Even sliding open the door was a challenge.

"Who's there?" I heard Derek's voice demand. I'd barely opened the door, and it was dark so he hadn't seen me yet.

I slipped through the small opening, stumbling down the steps. He was just coming down the spiral staircase, but I knew he could see the distress on my face.

"Kara." He said. The way he said it almost sounded like a question.

"I killed her...." I whispered, staring down at my red hands. "I- I.... killed her."

Derek sprinted over to me, inspecting me for injuries I'd assume, but I had none. "Who?" Derek asked hesitantly. "Who'd you kill."

"..... Allison." My voice cracked.

"Derek!" Scott's voice echoed through the halls outside. I panicked, scrambling to hide behind one of the pillars. Derek moved quickly to the door, but I couldn't see any further if I was to keep myself hidden.

"Derek, we need to talk-" Scott's voice echoed, but it was much closer, making my heart race.

"I can't now." Derek said simply.

"What- why? It's Kara she's-"

"I know." Derek stated.

"She's here?" I heard Scott say. There was scuffling, and I could only assume Scott tried to enter.

"Scott, go." Derek told him

"Kara, please...." Scott begged. I stayed put, covering my mouth so he couldn't hear my sobs.

"Scott.... Go." Derek said again. "She'll be okay."

"I'm sorry, Kara...." Scott said quietly before I heard his footsteps retreating down the hall.

Sorry? Why was he sorry? I just murdered his ex girlfriend- how was he the sorry one? I was too much of a coward to even face him, how could he apologize to me?

I heard the door being closed again, and Derek making his way back over to me.

"I'm not okay- I'm not going to be okay, Derek- I killed-" I couldn't even finish the sentence.

"Hey, no!" Derek bent down, taking my face in his hands. "You fall apart and he wins, that demon, will kill everyone else you care about. So you keep it together."

"Derek, I can't-" I shook my head, my hands trembling. "I can't-"

"Yes, you can!" He insisted. "You are going to clean yourself up, and get back up. You are strong enough to get through this-"

"I'm not!" I fired back. "I don't have an ounce of strength left! Derek- I murdered her in cold blood! And then I ran! After they risked their lives to save me, I left them there!"

Derek dropped his head for a moment, he looked like he was severely struggling to keep me going. He should just give up, I'm not worth the trouble.

"Kara.... You can't give up." He shook his head, his voice low and desperate. "This.... This is never going to go away, the pain you're feeling now. It's gonna stay there forever, and every time you're reminded of her, it'll hurt all over again.... But if you give up- you give up now and she died for nothing."

I thought the same thing when I tried desperately to help Stiles. My Dad was gone, but if I lost Stiles then it was all for nothing. I couldn't live with it then, but what if I couldn't pull myself together now?

"You have to decide now." Derek said, pushing my hair back. "Right now."

I stared back at him for a few seconds, my heart hammering away. "O-okay..." I nodded shakily.

"You have one minute to finish crying, and until this over you're going to keep it together." Derek told me. I didn't say anything, I just gave a small nod.

I let myself cry. I knew it had to be the last time for now, and there's no way I'd be able to hold it in now. Derek's face softened, and he picked me up bridal style. I didn't know where he was taking me and I didn't care, all I had the energy to do was cry on his shoulder.

Eventually, he sat me down in a chair. "Minute's over," he said. Like he said, I stopped crying and held my face still. I didn't talk, or move unless he told me to.

He brought over a bowl of water, then began cleaning the blood from my hands with a cloth. I watched as the red spots began to disappear. There was a small stain, but it was enough to keep it in the back of my mind.

"The Nogitsune said the cuff was made by my family." I finally said as he finished up with my hands. He dropped the cloth into the blow, glancing back up at me.

"Some of your ancestors, hundred of years ago. They didn't agree with Guardians who chose to live as humans.... They thought it was- selfish. There were so few Guardians, and too many wolves who needed protection. Your family is the only I've ever heard of, so someone choosing to stay human, wasn't some small thing. They thought the cuffs were essential to survival."

"Slavery." I clarified.

"They were wrong." Derek shook his hand. "Your Grandfather, and my Mother saw to it that all the cuffs were destroyed, but I guess they didn't find them all."

"What happened to them?" I asked. "My Dad never said a word about them."

"Gerard." Derek answered. "He killed most of them, a few fled, the only reason you and your parents lived, is because he swore he'd poison you and Evan with Mistletoe, to keep any more of his line from turning. My house burned down shortly after, and I fled."

"I'm sorry..." I said, squeezing his hand.

"It was a long time ago." He pushed it aside.

"You lost your family, time isn't an excuse. I'm sorry for what my Father did back then." I said.

"At any cost, I'm lucky to have you now." He said looking down at my hands.

We were interrupted suddenly by Derek's phone going off. He took it out, looking down at a text.

"What is it?" I asked.

"They need the box." He said jumping to his feet.

"Box? What box?" I asked.

"It's made of wood from the nemeton, they think it can contain the Nogitsune's spirit." He said opening up a chest near his bed. He pulls out a wooden box, a triskele carved into the top.

"We can trap it..." I realized.

"Exactly." Derek confirmed.

AN: I've been going back to the first book, editing through grammar, spelling, and adding a few things. I just finished the first book, and I'll let you guys know when I'm done with the others.

Just 3 more chapters of this book left! I'm so excited to post what I've already written for season 4 :)