"Y/N.." he whispers. "You.. killed a man. In cold blood. For me."
My jaw tightens.
He continues. "Just shot him. Right between the eyes without even blinking. I know that you and I are close, but you have no idea what I've done. I deserved that bul...
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At this point, I feel like my heart is going to beat out of my chest or explode. Maybe both. The anticipation of finding out my result and the fact that I had a seizure barely four hours ago is making it hard to breathe. Anxiety creeps into my head and stress creates more and more pressure within my body.
I took my scan about two and a half hours ago. It shouldn't take this long to get results right? Not if it's good news? I lean my head back and let out a long, sharp breath, trying to calm my nerves, but I can't help it. Behind my closed lids, my emotions begin to become visible in tiny salty droplets of water created by the stress of my unbearable situation and sheer fear itself.
My fingers shake and I cover my eyes with my good hand, letting out a shaking exhale.
The silence in this room is so loud. All of the boys wanted to come in and stay with me while we waited, but Kai didn't want anything to potentially trigger another seizure if I'm still prone to another. He said one at a time and to keep noise at a minimum. Everyone has come in and out at least once, some in twice.
I don't know what they're doing on the other side of the door, but I assume going between Namjoon and I.
The boy stirs in the chair next to me and I open my eyes, only moving them to see Jungkook waking up. He looks at me, one eye still closed while the other barely opened. His hair is a mess, sticking out on a few different angles. He was shifting and mumbling quite a bit, I think he was dreaming.
"Are you crying?" He asks in a groggy, deep voice.
I sniff and shake my head, offering a slight smile.
"I'm fine, just sleep," I say, looking down at my lap, fiddling with the tube of the new IV they stuck into my arm.
He does the opposite, leaning onto his elbow and scooting forward.
"No, you're not. It's okay to be upset," he says, shaking his head. His usual tough and competitive attitude completely dissipated. As if I'm talking to someone else. A softer side, caring side. "Hell, I'd be freaking the fuck out right now. Honestly I am and I'm not even sick."
"I am freaking out, I'm just too tired to show it or do anything about it..." I say, my lips twitching slightly as I look down, tears beginning to blur my vision.
His hand gently lands on my good thigh, rubbing it slightly in comfort.
"I know, I'm sorry. If you want to talk, I'm here for you. If not, I think you should try and rest."
I wipe my eyes and press my lips into a line to prevent any more tears from escaping. "I can't sleep. I can't calm my nerves enough to the point I'm able to sleep. I don't know what's wrong with me, Jungkook. This could potentially end my life, either physically or giving me no purpose. I can't sleep because I'm sick. I can't sleep because I'm terrified that I'll never wake again."
