The Magic Within ↠ Once Upon A Time

[Chapter 85] A Dark Heart

Y'all better get the popcorn ready cause shit is about to go down!

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~Melody's POV~

How had I not realized how lonely it is at night?

Now that I try to fall asleep, and fail, I realize how silent and alone I truly feel. Well, I'm not so cold and alone. Henry is snoring beside me. I was too afraid to sleep alone, and since I have the bigger bed, my brother chose to sleep over. If our mom had her way, I'd be squished between them but that was too suffocating. So, here we are, sleeping in the same bed like a couple of kids too scared to sleep alone in a thunderstorm. Henry keeps me company, and his body keeps out the cold air. Yet, he snores. He's asleep while I'm wide awake.

It's not like sleep is an option.

If I go to sleep, then I have to relive the nightmare that I've gone through. I don't want to keep everyone awake with my screaming. I don't want them worried about me as I try to cry myself to sleep.

Even with my bed accompanied by another body, I've never felt so alone. Even with a family and a roof over my head, I feel like the pathetic little girl who had to huddle into a cave for warmth. I stayed in the darkness just to keep my memories alive. Now when I finally had the life I wanted, it's the endless darkness that is taking them away.

At this moment, it's just me, the quiet still night, and the grief in my heart.

Don't forget me, it calls. If it had a physical body, it'd probably be raising its hand at the corner of my room.

I sigh quietly, closing my eyes only to wish away the voice.

You were lonely. What else am I suppose to do, hear you cry all night?

"For once, won't you let me?" I whisper as light as a mouse. My head begins to ache while I scan my room, looking for something that I know isn't there.

Sure, but isn't it pathetic to cry alone? You have me.

"Well, I'm tired of crying in front of people," I admit. "What can they do? They don't have the power to bring back my Papa. They're useless to me." Although my voice wasn't enough to be a whisper, I turn away from Henry so that I can't wake him with my one-sided conversation. It hurts to admit this, but it hurts more knowing that there isn't more that I could've done for Papa. I would've overturned the entire world if I could save Papa. Either way, as Henry told me, I'm allowed this for myself.

I hate to admit it, but some magic can only go so far.

I exhale a long, low sigh.

I'm assuming that you hate to keep losing.

"I thought I'd get used to it."

But we find new ways to get hurt, the Voice finishes.

"You aren't wrong," I seemingly agree. I don't know if it's making sense or if I'm simply too tired to fight back. Surely, I'm too exhausted to get up and walk around the house to push away their alluring voice. It was too much trouble to put my back towards Henry. I've sunk into the mattress that I dare not move. I grasp onto my plush pillow for any comfort that I can get. If I could fake it enough to believe that this pillow was a living, breathing thing, I'd imagine that I was leaning on Papa's arm.