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"You alright?" She asked her husband as she saw his staring blankly at his phone. "Nipsey was shot..they sayin' it's not looking good" he wanted to cry but was holding tears back. "Oh my god, Lauren and the kids" Beyoncé teared up immediately she was an emotional person anyway. "Aye I need to go drive and clear my head" he announced. She nodded that was his healthy way of dealing with things so she left him to it. "Wait, baby" she grabbed him and kissed him deeply. "I love you, be safe." "Love you too Bey" he kissed her hand. He grabbed his car keys and headed for the open road. He blasted his music but that didn't drown out the thoughts he was having. Why do I keep losing people? No matter how far I get so from the hood demons keep following me? How come people around me die and I'm still here after all I've done? Do I even deserve to be around? He snapped out of his dark thoughts, he hadn't even noticed but he had a tear escape from his eye. He realized he was far away from home, actually he was kinda lost. He decided he had driven far enough and put on his gps and headed home, it was getting dark anyway.
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It was pretty late when he got in he knew the kids would be sleeping he went into his oldest daughters bedroom to say goodnight, truthfully he needed to hug on her he was thankful he was able to do that given the events that took place today. He bent over to kiss Blue's cheek. "Daddy? You're back?" She asked groggily. "Yeah lefty sorry I didn't mean to wake you." "That's okay daddy." "Lefty?" "Yes daddy?" "What have I taught you?" He asked. "What do you mean daddy? Like today? I don't remember you telling me anything?" She was confused. "No lefty like what do you learn from me?" He knew that was a heavy question for a seven year old but he considered his daughter to be smarter than the average seven year old. "Well you tell me there's no such thing as a stupid question and to always ask questions" she said after a while of thinking on it. He smiled he needed to hear that, that was one of the things he wanted to instill in his children to ask questions, to be inquisitive don't just take somebody's word for it decide for themselves. "Okay lefty, go back to sleep goodnight I love you." "Love you daddy" she laid back down. He went to the twins room to kiss them goodnight too, he was extra careful not to wake them he didn't want those problems. "Hi baby" Beyoncé greeted him when he walked in their room. He nodded in her direction giving her a faint smile. He undressed and changed into some basketball shorts and a white tee. They cuddled close in bed she turned the tv to ESPN hoping to keep his mind occupied. She looked up a few times and noticed he wasn't really paying attention to the tv she could tell he was in deep thought. "Wanna talk about it?" She offered. "Honestly not right now." She nodded in understanding not wanting to force it on him. "Try to get some sleep baby." "Yeah that sounds like a good idea" he turned the tv off. "Goodnight" she went to kiss him on the lips. He kissed her back, she deepened the kiss reaching into his basketball shorts. "Don't start" he warned. She didn't listen, taking it more as a warning than an order. "Seriously Bey I'm exhausted mentally I can't, I'm not in the right headspace" he truthfully admitted. She backed off. "I think you should make an appointment" she said. He knew exactly what she meant by appointment she was referring to his therapist. He wasn't going as often as he used to because he felt he was in a good place. He could've been offended by her suggestion, every time something goes wrong in life therapy shouldn't be brought up, but she knew events like this triggered him and he understood where she was coming from. "You're right, I'll make the call in the morning" He was thankful he was at a place in his life where he could accept help. A few years ago he would've tried to hide his feelings about a tragic event like this, pretending it didn't shake him because he was used to it.
Black is growing up around your family & making it Then being forced to leave the place you love because there's hate in it.. -Dave "Black"
RIP to Nipsey I'm not gonna pretend I listened to his music like that but from what I do know about him he seemed like a good dude and he was helping build up where he came from.👼🏾 #TheMarathonContinues 🏁
