#SOTUS Continued: Book One A PremWad Tale

What My Heart Wants

Arthit's POV

I run out from the party stopping at the elevator. Pushing the down call button over and over as if that would make it come faster. Why is the world moving so slow!! Finally, the doors open, and I get in, pushing the button for the lobby. Bolting out the doors the second they open. Frantically going through the lobby looking for that familiar silhouette, but I don't see it anywhere. Out the glass doors to the parking, I continue looking. Still, I can't find him. Stopping to catch my breath, I tell myself I can find him tomorrow and tell him. Tomorrow. Placing my hand on my chest, I get the overwhelming sensation that tomorrow will be too late. All the chances he gave me I wasted. Shit, Kongpop, where are you!?!

I take out my phone and call him only to have it go straight to voicemail. I glare at my phone, frustrated that I can't find him.

Knott and the others come out. Knott looks around before looking over at me, raising an eyebrow in question. I just shake my head. He holds up his keys, and I shake my head again. I didn't want to ride back with them. I don't think I can take it. I want to be alone. Kongpop! Where are you?

"P'Arthit?"

I swear at this moment, it feels like the world has stopped as impossible as it sounds. Everything ground to a halt for me. Part of me was afraid to turn around. I am afraid it is a cruel joke.

"P'Arthit?" he repeats.

Kongpop. I turn to see him standing there looking at me. He looks over at my friends leaving without me. A look of confusion paints his features.

"Y-y-you are still here?" I stutter out. I am rubbing my neck, trying to compose myself.

"I didn't feel like going back just yet," Kongpop explains. I can tell he wants to say more but stops himself.

"Are you hungry?" I ask to keep him with me longer. Seriously? Out of all the things you can say, you ask that! Please stay. I hope.

I remember back to the party when Kongpop had told me, "The more you do this, P'Arthit, it is like you are giving me hope."

But right now, I am the one that wants to hope. That even though I have hurt him, I hope he will give me this chance to try to leap. His face may be calm, but his eyes are not. Emotions flash through them with each blink of his eye. It is like a slideshow. Hurt. Despair. Hope. Anger. Love. Longing. Fear.

"I am hungry for something to eat...come with me?" I continue looking pleadingly.

Not waiting for him to answer, I begin walking down the street. Mentally, I am begging and praying Kongpop will follow me. After a few steps, I hear him fall in behind me. My heart warmed, knowing he had chosen to follow me rather than to walk away. Maybe. Just maybe.

We find a roadside stall and sit down opposite each other. After ordering, I find myself looking at Kongpop. Images of when we went to the noodle shop after the mall and the meal we shared in his dorm flicker through my mind. I feel like we have been here before, but I know this is not the past but the present... and the desire for the future. I know I should say something, but I can't. I want to let this... us here... imprinting this moment forever. In case when tomorrow comes, I can't have this ever again.

When our food is delivered, I decided to share my meatballs with him knowing he likes them. I place them in his bowl and give a brief smile. Watching the play of emotions on Kongpop's face as he looks at his bowl.

"P'Arthit, why are you doing this to me?" He whispers.

"Doing what?" I say.

He looks up from his bowl, "Do you really not know or are just pretending not to know?"