With Every Step We Take

Chapter 30

I re-read the threatening note I found taped on my family van,

Dearest Christen, I hope having a boyfriend is worth the tremendous amount of discord that will soon be coming into your life.

I shake my head. "Samantha needs to stop writing these notes. They are just stupid." I say to Mandy. I crumble up the note and put it in my pocket.

She looks at me wide eyed. "How could Samantha possibly do that and she's in jail?"

I think about it. Mandy was right, this letter wasn't mailed, it was physically taped on my family van. This could only be done by a free person. Is it possible there is someone else out to get me?

I release the thought from my head. That's their problem not mine, my GOD will protect me.

Mandy still looks spooked, but I laugh it off. "It's ok Mandy GOD will take care of this, I'm fine. You just focus on having a good time at the party tonight." I say refusing to let this bother me.

Mandy, and I walk up the stairs to my house. She took me home from school today, so we could hang out before she goes to the party.

"Christen you can't do this!" She shouts dramatically,continuing the dispute we were having before we found the note. It's possible that she took me home just to yell at me.

I turn around. "I'm not going to the party Manders, I told you GOD told me not to."

I told every one I wasn't going to the party two days ago, and Mandy is the only person that is still trying to convince me to go.

"Christen are you sure that GOD actually told you that?"

"What do you mean?" I ask Mandy, confused.

She sighs. "Is it possible that you could be talking to yourself sometimes, but you think it's GOD?"

I take my time to process what Mandy is saying to me. "Are you suggesting I mimic GOD's voice subconsciously?" I ask in disbelief.

"I'm just saying you might do it sometimes, and I think this party is one of those times." She admits.

"Mandy that's ridiculous." I say, starting to open the door to my house.

"Think about it Christen, it is possible that you can be making a mistake?"

I shake my head. "GOD wouldn't lead me astray like that. If I was ever talking to myself he would help me correct it."

"Maybe he is trying to help you correct it through me." Mandy says gently.

I take in a deep breath, I'm starting to feel really depressed. I feel like the firm rock on which I stand is starting to shake, and slip away before my eyes. This can't be happening.

'GOD help me overcome this doubt.' I plead.

There was no answer, and I'm starting to fear Mandy is right. Maybe I am talking to myself.

'GOD please talk to me, and tell me this isn't true.' I say, but no answer.

I gulp. "Maybe you are right." I say shakily.

Mandy gives me a hug. "It will be ok. Now let's go get you ready for tonight."

"Ok." I say lowly. I have a small feeling that I shouldn't do this, but I push it down, and let Mandy help me get ready.

Once we get upstairs Mandy tears up my closet looking for outfits. She brought her clothes here. It was almost like she knew she was was going to convince me to come to the party.

"How about this?" Mandy says, holding up a purple mini dress.

I laugh humorlessly. "I wore that to my 8th grade graduation, so I'm just going to rule that out.'