Call It What You Want - An Aaron Ramsey Fanfiction

Chapter 14

Chapter 14

I SAID I’D SHOW YOU I CARED… SO HERE I AM. IN CARDIFF. WATCHING THE MATCH. I’LL BE AT EVERY ONE. AND ARSENAL TOO. I attached the picture I had taken and then sent it to him.

That was my plan go to all the Cardiff and Arsenal matches. Take a picture. Then send it to Aaron. I don’t know why but it seemed like a good idea. I wanted to show him that something of his had an effect on me…

I wasn’t expecting a reply, I just got back in Kevin’s car and drove back to London.

“How was the match?” Kevin asked.

“Cold. Aaron came on for the last 10 minutes.”

“You drove to Cardiff to watch the guy who won’t talk to you for play for 10 measly minutes?”

“Yep.”

“You’re stupid.”

“I’m trying to make it up to him”

“Whatever. I still think he should get over it.”

“Kevin it’s my fault.”

“The guy got you drunk,”

“I could have said no,”

“Well-“

“Look, I’ll see you on Monday,”

“Yeah,”

As soon as I was alone with no one to talk to and no radio to entertain me I felt alone. I pulled my hoody around my body trying to bring some sort of comfort. The feeling of loneliness was crippling. It made me want to stop and curl up and never move again. Because I always blocked people out I had never felt anything like this.

I remember hearing once that you could tell a relationship was worth having if it hurt when it ended. I couldn’t help feeling that that was shit logic ‘cos you have to lose them first…  But it did hurt.

Cardiff vs Leeds

Arsenal vs Leeds

Norwich vs Cardiff

Leeds vs Arsenal

Cardiff vs Watford

Arsenal vs Ipswich

Arsenal vs Huddersfield.

Those were the matches I went to in January. All my money was going towards tickets and travel. That weekend there was a Wales match and I begged Kevin to come with me.

He looked bored throughout the match only commenting on which of the players were attractive and asking if any were gay and if so could I introduce them.

The play built up and I was leaning out of my seat as Aaron got the ball. I leapt to my feet and screamed as the ball sailed into the net. I turned to Kevin grinning as he snapped a picture of me.

“What the fuck?” I asked.

“You looked cute so I thought you could send it to Aaron.”

I gave him a look before looking at the phone screen. My nose is red and my eyes are wide and glowing like a child. You can see my Wales scarf and my mouth is caught in a crazy smile. I shook my head.

“Just do it,” Kevin said.

“Fine.”

KEVIN TOOK THIS WHILE I WAS CELEBRATING YOUR GOAL… WELL DONE. I attached the picture and sent it.

I carried on with this routine for another month and a half. Working. Going to matches. Repeat. Aaron came off loan and sitting at Old Trafford I saw him getting ready to come on.

I was so happy to see him in an Arsenal shirt I cried. I took the picture of him entering the pitch and clapped. Even though Arsenal lost it felt like an achievement. The other fans felt it too, seeing him play again.

The next day I was shopping for food when someone slammed straight into my back. I turned around to see Samir. “Er hi,”

“Hi,” He smiled slightly awkwardly.

“Erm, how are you?”

“Okay. Thanks. You?”

“Good.” There was a pause. “Have you heard from Grace?”

He swallowed “I saw her in December.”

“Oh right,”

“She got hit by a car.”

“Oh my God is she okay?”

“Yeah, few broken bones.”

I nodded not really knowing where to take the conversation, it was hardly like I knew her. I wanted desperately to ask about Aaron but it didn’t seem like the right time.

“I had better… carry on shopping.” I turned away.

“Aaron will forgive you.”

“What?”

“He’ll forgive you. I think. He still cares.”

I hugged Sam before walking away.

*

Craig called me into his office, he looked nervous. “Erm, Anais can you remember what we talked about a couple of months ago…”

I thought for a second… “Erm… we spoke about you not using my cups in the kitchen…”

“Not that.”

“Okay, I have no idea what you’re going on about then,”

“Look, we’re… going to have to let you go.”

It came back to me then. The conversation which led to me texting Aaron which started this whole thing off. Thinking about Aaron created a wave of sadness.

“Oh,” Was all I could say and then, “When… err… when am I leaving…?”

He looked uncomfortable, “Well…. err I’ve been trying to put this off ahem…. for a week so errr… today.”

“Are you fucking kidding me?”

He didn’t answer as I stormed out of his office. I picked up my coffee cup and phone and went to leave… I didn’t really have a lot of stuff on my desk.

As I passed Liddy she grinned, “Oh it’s fine Anais, I’m sure Aaron will help you… oh woops I forgot you fucked that up.”

I took a deep breath. Looked at the cup in my hand and then hurled it. It went through the window behind Liddy and the glass shattered.

Craig ran out of his office, “What the fuck, Anais?”

“You sue me for criminal damage I sue you for wrongful dismissal. I think we know which one is more serious.”

I stormed out leaving the whole office stunned.

Kevin caught up with me eventually. “Good show, girl” He said.

“Yep.”

“What are you going to do now?”

“Going home.”

“Okay.”

He continued to walk with me to my apartment even though I hadn’t asked him.

When I got to my apartment I saw the door was ajar. I eyebrows furrowed… what? I looked at my phone. “Fuck.” I whispered.

I THINK WE’RE EVEN NOW. NO?

I pushed the door open and understood what he meant. My television. Furniture gone. Everything else destroyed. Book pages pulled out, plates and cups smashed.

“Luka” I whispered as I saw the broken plant pot and my cactus spilt over the carpet.

“Who did this…?” Kevin breathed beside me.

“My dad.”

I fell to the floor. Sobbing in the way that makes you feel like you will break in two. I wasn’t aware of Kevin behind me trying to soothe my back, whispering that I could stay with him.