Idée Fixe (Completed)

Chapter 9

Chapter 9

SAFIRE

"Ahhh...sige pa diinan mo pa." Ungol ko. This is so good I never felt this good in my entire life.

"You want it hard, baby?"

"Yes...yes!" Tugon ko. "Ayan diyan!"

"Ok." He said. Nagpatuloy siya sa pagmamasahe sa akin hanggang narinig ko ang tunog ng aking buto sa likod.

"You can stop now." I told him, umalis siya sa likuran ko at kinumutan ako. Tumabi siya sa akin at tumihaya ako, kipkip ko ang kumot dahil wala akong suot na pang-itaas. "Ang sarap mo pa lang magmasahe." Puri ko sa kaniya.

"I'm glad you like it."

"Where did you learn that?" Tumagilid ako to face him.

"Kay Nanay, iyong umampon sa akin noon, bulag siya at nagtatrabaho siya sa isang massage parlor."

Oh, I see.

"I think hindi ko na kakailanganin pang pumunta sa massage parlor, I got you." I said followed by a giggle.

"Pumupunta ka sa mga ganoon?"

"Yup! Kapag payday, you know to relax and sometimes kapag may back pain ako though mahilig akong magpa-massage hindi ako marunong kaya huwag kang magpapamasahe sa akin ah! Sasamahan na lang kita sa isang parlor."

Ngumiti siya sa akin at yumakap, his
head is buried on my neck. "I'm happy, Saf."

"Happy? Baka tired kamo."

Inangat niya ang kaniyang ulo. "No, I'm happy because you stayed."

I can see happiness in his eyes, this man really loves me, huh? Too bad I don't feel the same way. Wala lang talaga akong lakas na kumawala sa kaniya because of the video, napanood ko iyon and I looked like a wanton woman, eager to be f*ck. Halos hindi ko makilala ang sarili ko doon. Kanina noong sinabi niyang mahal niya ako, I just stayed silently shock and after a minute or two I told him that I will stay.

"Bakit mo ko mahal, Tristan? Wala naman akong ginawa noon para mahalin mo ko, I even shoo you away." Hanggang ngayon palaisipan pa rin sa akin iyan.

"I don't know...the moment I saw you I just felt the need to own you." He said, looking at me and still hugging me.

"Own me? You can't own me, Tristan hindi ako isang bagay."

"I know but I can't stop myself. Gusto kita, Saf mahal kita and if I can just cage you para walang ibang lalakeng makakita at magkagusto sa'yo ay ginawa ko na but I know I can't do that and you wouldn't like it." Hindi ko mapigilan ang pagtaasan ng balihibo sa kaniyang sinabi. He wanted to cage me?

"You are a person, a woman that I love and not a bird that I can cage." Dadag pa niya.

Mabuti naman at naisip niya iyon! He started nuzzling my neck. "T-tristan, what are you doing?"

"I'm showing my love for you." He started to give me a wet kisses on my neck, he even pulled down the sheets to bare my boobs. He grabbed one of my boob using his left hand and started rubbing it that makes me undeniably hot!

"T-tristan...stop it." Bawal ko pero parang daing ang dating noon.

"I love you, Saf and if I can't claim you now I'm gonna die." He said almost desperately. Itinulak niya ako para mahiga ng maayos at kapagkuwan ay dinaganan ako. I am in so much heat that I can't even feel his weight when he started kissing me. Mali ito, alam kong mali ito, I should be stopping him, I should push him because that's the sanest thing to do dahil hindi ko naman siya mahal, he maybe my boyfriend but I was just in this relationship because I was blackmailed pero hanggang sa matapos ang lahat ay wala akong ginawa kundi ang humalinghing, umungol at isigaw ang kaniyang pangalan.

"Love me, baby please love me." I heard him begged before I dozed off .

Kinabukasan, pagkagising ko ay sinalubong ako ng magandang ngiti ni Tristan habang may hawak itong tray na naglalaman ng pagkain. "Good morning, baby."

Ang gwapo ng mokong na 'to tapos ang daming pandesal sa tiyan. 21 pa lang siya pero ang ganda na ng hulma ng kaniyang katawan pwedeng ipasok bilang model! Sabagay, noong 15 pa lang siya eh kitang-kita ko na ang kakisigan niya, if we were on the same age and he's not creepy before baka na-inlove na ako sa kaniya but who am I fooling? That time I was so smitten to Simone Montier, niligawan ko ang damuhong iyon kahit na ako ang babae sa amin pero nganga, in love daw sa ibang babae.

"Breakfast in bed for my beautiful baby." Aniya sabay lapag noong tray. Ang say-saya niya. Eh paano nakapagpalabas ng L niya. Biglang nanlaki ang aking mga mata nang may maalala ako.

Tumayo ako at pumunta ng banyo at nagtalon-talon. He came inside! Paano kung mabuntis ako?! Hindi ako nagpipills dahil hindi naman namin iyon ginagawa, ito ang pangalawang beses na ginawa namin ito.

"Anong petsa na?" Fertile ba ako? Natataranta na ako nang makarinig ako ng isang katok.

"Baby, are you ok?"

Binuksan ko ang pinto. Not minding if I'm naked, wala na rin naman akong maitatago sa kaniya.

"You didn't use a protection!"

"What's wrong with that?" He asked innocently.

"D*mmit! Baka mabuntis mo ako!" Inis kong sabi.

"Anong problema doon? Don't worry, I'll take the responsibility if I got you pregnant." He said while smiling dahilan para lalo akong mairita. Bakit ba ang tanga ko?! Of course, he want me to get pregnant para maitali na niya ako sa kaniya. Ayoko pang magpakasal at lalong ayoko pang magkaanak, I'm not yet ready, 25 pa lang ako and I still have dreams to achieve.

"Ewan ko sa'yo! Sa susunod, use a condom." Teka! May mali sa sinabi ko. "Wala na palang susunod!"

To my surprise he laughs. What the eff?! May problema nga yata talaga siya sa pag-iisip.

"That's a good joke." He said.

"Hindi ako nagbibiro!" Feeling ko pulang-pula na ang mukha ko dahil sa galit and this man thinks that I'm joking!

Biglang nagseryoso ang kaniyang mukha. "I will assure you hindi iyon ang huli, baby and as for the condom hinding-hinding ako gagamit noon, I want you bare without any protection at hinding-hindi rin ako papayag na magpills ka, even withdrawal will not gonna happen so be ready to be a mom."

"No! How dare you do that?! Hindi pa ako handa, you can't make me do that!" Sigaw ko

He the grabbed my arm, his face turned dark. "Then what are you gonna do? Take a pill and kill my child? Because I will not let you do that, Saf." Mariing aniya.

I shivered because of the fear I felt.