Sunshine & Lemons • sope

29: "potty training"

"KIM JUNGKOOK!!!" taehyung yelled from the livingroom of the kim household.

"ew he smells."

"that's it, i'm potty training you. this is the fourth pamper you've ruined with poop and piss in one hour. i'm teaching you the big boy way of taking a shit." taehyung spoke, pointing at a teary eyed jungkook. "got it?"

the baby gurgled and giggled, waving his arms around when taehyung's face came into his field of vision.

"i think he gets it." jimin said, taking a peek at jungkook while pinching his noise.

‹-›

"so why the fuck am i here?" yoongi questioned when he was shoved into the livingroom of the kim residence.

"remember, you're my pretend wife, therefore you have to help me teach jungkook how to poop the big boy way." taehyung pointed at the blonde writer.

"uh, no."

"then why am i here?" seokjin asked, taking a seat on the couch as namjoon crawled out of his sweater, popping his head out and glancing at his surroundings from beside seokjins neck.

taehyung turned to the chef with a smile. "i like having you around, so your just here for company."

"playdate!!" jimin shouted from the kitchen, causing namjoon to turn his head and cheer, and for hoseok to yell from yoongi's shirt pocket. (although it was muffled since there was a sweater covering his sight.)

"so do we start?!"

"no." yoongi mumbled but was ignored.

"let's go! c'mon jungkookie! yoongi's gonna teach you how to poop!"

all yoongi could hear were baby noises and fairies screaming.

‹-›

"seokjinnie! i'm hungry!" jimin yelled, panting as he dropped himself on top of hoseok who had been laying down on his stomach. the earth fairy let it a small 'oof' making a pout at namjoon who only giggled at the two, not helping hoseok out as he whined.

"what do you want to eat?" the blond chef asked, looking down at jimin who rolled off of hoseok.

"anything."

"i want a sandwich!" namjoon yelled, sitting down and looking at his socked feet, wiggling his toes.

"i want ice cream!" hoseok yelled next, reaching out to pinch namjoon's toes, earning himself a squeal.

"oh oh!"jimin perked up next to hoseok, bouncing in place as he looked up at seokjin. "i want the string soup!"

"ramen?"

"yeah!"

"i'll go make it then. don't make a mess while i'm cooking." seokjin called out while he walked to the kitchen. it wasn't like the fairies would make a mess, they were good boys when seokjin was taking care of them, especially if they knew they would get to hug seokjin after eating.

"we'll just take a nap! i'm kinda tired." namjoon made a pout, hoseok climbing on top of him and knocking him backwards, jimin following right after so that namjoon had a fairy on each side of him.

‹-›

"how's potty training?"

taehyung jumped in place falling from his crouched position and looking up at seokjin in the doorway of the bathroom.

"he's... not pooping," taehyung said with a pout. "he hasn't done anything."

"he fell asleep like three times." yoongi commented, watching jungkook squeeze his eyes shut and wrinkle his nose as his tiny hands balled up into tiny fists.

"he looks like he's trying his best."

"he looks constipated that's what." taehyung sighed out, standing up and grabbing jungkooks spare pajamas from a cabinet in the bathroom.

"c'mon kookie, we're gonna go play!"

taehyung picked up his baby and spun him around, setting him down on the counter and changing him into his dinosaur pajamas, all the while the baby giggled and waved his arms around.

when the humans walked into the living room, they found the three fairies piled on top of each other, snoring softly.

"they're cute." seokjin cooed, taehyung nodding his head in agreement while setting jungkook on the couch next to the fairies, reaching out for a panda stuffy. (or stuffie? im confused.)

"sure they are." yoongi said, watching as hoseok rolled off of namjoon and onto jimin, drool dripping down his cheek and onto jimins bare tummy.

‹-›

taehyung snored softly, jungkook was sprawled on top of him covered in blankets with his hand in front of his mouth, sleeping peacefully with his dad.

meanwhile, the three fairies were happily eating in the kitchen, sharing a bowl of ramen with the help of yoongi and seokjin who helped each of them grab a noodle and eat it in tiny bites, holding the noodle with both their hands.

"how did taehyung end up with jungkook?" seokjin asked, glancing at the sleeping kims.

"we both went to college together, we used to party a lot and do a bunch of stupid shit." yoongi began talking, handing namjoon another noodle from the bowl when he reached out for more.

"thafms am mfaf wmfoef" hoseok tried to say as he chewed.

"shut up hoseok. keep eating." yoongi pushed Hoseok's hands to stuff the noodle in his mouth.

"anyway, taehyung used to go around from bed to bed and it was around the end of his third year when this girl, I'm pretty sure she was a senior, told taehyung she was pregnant." yoongi sighed when he remembered that moment specifically. yoongi was there when it happened. "they went for a test even though taehyung was the last person she slept with, so she was pretty sure it was his child."

"and she left him with jungkook?"

"yeah. but taehyung finished school despite having to take care of jungkook as a newborn." yoongi unconsciously made a pout, making seokjin chuckle. "I had to babysit while he went to school. that's why he calls me pretend wife, because I stay at home all day and write, while jungkook plays by himself and does whatever a baby does."

"oh my god he pooped on me!!!" jimin perked up from his eating, looking in the direction of the livingroom where the group heard squealing and screaming.

"mmmhhhMMMMMM" namjoon squealed, trying to pull his noodle away from hoseok who was chewing on the other end.

"nO!! this is my noodle!" hoseok stretched his arms and pulled on the noodle, making namjoon fall forward.

"my shirt is wet!"




 

**y'all**