What We Wish For

Chapter 12

So the picture on the side is how Lea looks today.

Chapter 12

Jakes POV:

Choose your love. Love you choice. - Thomas S. Monson

I was running over to meet my dad. I didn't get why he wanted me to be there when the new members arrived. It was his job to accept them not mine. I know there isn't too many months left before I take over for him as Alpha, but I knew how this worked, I didn't need to see it again.

Why did they have to come at this time of the day anyway? I was just about to go home with a girl when he called me through our mind link and told me to get my ass down there. He only ever contacted me if it had something to do with the pack or my mom and sister. He, as well as my sister, didn't talk much with me any more. Emily knew from the start that Lea was my mate and my father quickly figured it out, when my wolf freaked out when I discovered that Lea was gone. I guess they were disappointed in me and that was their way of showing it. Somehow I did get why. But me rejecting Lea was just as much for her as it was for me.

My granddad had known about Lea and me, how I don't know and had somehow managed to be there when I found out she was gone. He took me to the woods to talk with me and let me change into my wolf. He was ready to hunt her down, not stopping before he found her. But Louis stopped me first by force. I could have gotten him off me and run after her as I wanted, but I didn't want to hurt him so I stayed back. He then convinced my wolf that she had run for a reason and even if I tried I wouldn't find her. So I stayed home, but not quitting the search. I called every pack in the entire country, even some other counties trying to find out where she was but with no luck. My wolf kept thinking about that kiss with Lea. The one thing I really regretted doing. After that kiss I tried kissing a lot of girls, but none of them came even close to being able to compare with the kiss she and I shared. No one could really satisfy me after that or bring the same feelings. That kiss had my head spinning and making my body hot all over. Just the thought of that kiss had me all excited and I hated how just a memory about it could get me like that. How hot she was when she didn't do as I said.

In that moment of the kiss I thought about what life would be like with her if I could make it happen. But then she had to pull away from me. Something that took me completely by surprise, something that had never happened to me before, a girl had never walked away from me before. But then my brain came back to me and I had to think that I did this for her, as I well as I did it for myself.

I couldn't have someone like her as a mate. You couldn't say she was loved by the others my age, she wasn't hated they just all kind of ignored her. She was shy and kept for herself. She didn't have many friends and she was not strong, she seemed like a push over. I couldn't be with someone like her. I was Alpha and needed a strong outgoing and loving mate. I needed a really beautiful mate who would be able to stand by my side not some weak girl like her. I needed a woman.

And this was what I was doing for her, I knew she would never last as an Alpha female and wouldn't be able to do the job. So actually I was doing both of us and favour. I tried to get her out of my mind, and it went okay, until I kissed her. After that no one really compared to her.

About a year after she had disappeared we where having a pack meeting and I had just said some stuff to the pack when I suddenly felt a pain in my heart and then I felt empty. It took me a second to find out what it was. It was my bond with Lea being cut. I knew I had slept with a lot of girls but Ididn't think she would sleep with anyone. At this my wolf went crazy again and I had to run out from the meeting. To say he was furious was an understatement. I transformed as soon I was out and my wolf started to attack trees. He blamed me for what I had done, not understanding how I could have slept with anyone, knowing if she did the same our bond would break. By the thought of never seeing her again he became so sad I sank to the ground changing into my human self again, and that was how Louis found me hours later. Broken like a child.