Helpless

19. I wanna be where you are

Katy's POV

Warm sun woke me up the next morning. I yawned as I turned around to look at John. I opened my eyes but there was no one next to me. I sat up still naked from last night and looked around. There was nothing left what could confirm his presence.

I stood up and went to the bathroom. After I washed my face and brushed my teeth, I stood in front of the mirror and scanned my body. Hickeys on my thighs and stomach were more visible than yesterday, my skin was soft and delicate, red marks on my waist ass and boobs because of John's strong grip. I touched worriedly my bruised lips from long making out with my thumb.

"He's gonna kill me." I mumbled. You just know when you look at me that I had sex with someone.

I dressed up and went back into the bedroom. As I looked one last time at my bed, I noticed a little note on the pillow. I sat on my bed and took the paper.

Good morning, love!
If you're reading this note, it means that I'm unfortunately gone. I really didn't want to leave. Believe me. I want you to be happy and if you still think that you're happy with him, that's okay. You're everything what matters to me and I'm gonna do anything you want. I hope you find the love of your life because I already did. You.
I will be always here for you. I want you to feel loved and safe. Don't allow him to ruin your life, Kate. You don't deserve to be hurt. You're such a beautiful human being outside and inside. You need to believe in yourself and be my prism again. It's killing me to see your tears, it really is. I wanna run to you and kiss them making your problems disappear for a moment. Think and make the right decision. I trust you with all my heart which belongs to you.
I changed. I changed not only for myself. I changed for you. To be a better man. To treat you better and make you smile all the time. Sadly, this time isn't for me but I don't care. I just need to make sure that you know what you're doing and last night it looked like you wasn't sure. I don't know if you needed me or just sex. I don't know what's going on in your head but I still have hope and I won't give up. Not yet.
And what a dick would I be if I just walk away. I have no idea if you felt it but I kissed your cheek and forehead before I left you this note. Also, there is some breakfast in the kitchen for my princess. Hopefully Flynn didn't eat everything!

I love you so much, Katheryn and I feel like crying right now seeing you sleeping peacefully next to me. It's safe. You're safe.

And God, you're so fucking perfect. This cute face of yours, legs, chest... just everything. I could look at you for hours, years and never get tired of you. You're so kissable and lovable. I just can't. I could write this for so long but I couldn't tell you how much you mean to me. There's no words to explain my love to you. I hope I'll see you around.

You will always be my Katy, my face to call home forever.

Love, John.

I was looking at the piece of paper in my hand, tears in my eyes. I quickly stood up and ran to the kitchen. On the counter were pancakes waiting for me.

"No." I whispered as I looked around in hope that he was still here but of course he wasn't. He left for good.

"Katy?" Flynn asked from behind.

"No, no, no!" I sobbed loudly sitting on the cold floor.

"What's wrong?" Flynn kneeled next to me.