Helpless

13. Shadow days

Katy's POV

I was staying in bed. Just staring at the ceiling. Thinking about my baby. My dead baby. I was depressed and I felt like crying all days but I didn't have any tears left to cry. I was really helpless. Of course I wasn't alone with this. Shannon was staying with me and wanted to help somehow but I didn't say a word to her. She was hugging me and telling me that it wasn't my fault but she was just making me cry even when I had no power left. I didn't want to have her here. I wanted to be alone but I knew that she wanted to help. And I even when I didn't want her hugs and sweet words, I needed them. I needed her and she knew it.

"I'll go to the therapist with you, Kate. It will help." My best friend whispered in my ear still holding me tightly.

"I don't want to, Shan." I said quickly.

"Please. Do it for me." She begged me.

"I don't need a therapy."

"I will search for one." Shannon sighed as she stood up and walked away. She's gonna always take what she wants so there's no need to waste your my power on her telling her that I didn't need it and in fact I did need it. After a few minutes Shannon opened my door with a huge smile.

"I found it." She said happily.

"What?" I asked.

"A therapist for you. Well, he isn't a licensed therapist just yet but I'm sure he will help." Shan said proudly.

"Not a licensed therapist? What the fuck?"

"Oh calm down! You will like it."

"Cool, cool, cool." I rolled my eyes.

***

"Ready for your first therapy session?" Shannon screamed from downstairs.

"Therapy session very funny, Shan!" I screamed back taking my phone.

"I'm waiting in my car!"

"What is his name by the way?" I asked as I was bucked up in my seat.

"I don't even know." Shannon mumbled looking at the road.

"You sucks." I said rolling my eyes.

"Third floor, 258 door. I can go with you if you want." Shannon said as she parked the car.

"No, I'm good." I said opening the door. I went slowly towards the building. It was huge and had maybe twelve floors. I walked to the elevator and pressed the bottom.

"254...256...258!" As I found the right door, I took a deep breath and knocked.

"Come in!" Someone screamed. I opened the door and walked into the office. In front of me was a huge window and two armchairs with a table in the middle. "Hello, Miss. I'm-" He stopped making me look up. He was sitting in one of the armchairs. "Katy?"

"Ben? I-i didn't know you're a therapist." I mumbled. "I shouldn't be here-"

"No, no. Stay. I wanna help you. Sit." He said pointing at the other chair.

"I can't, Ben. You're John's brother." I said taking a step back.

"I won't tell him, Kate. I promise." He said.

"Fineee." I said as I sit down. Ben looked down at my stomach and cocked his eyebrow making me feel uncomfortable.

"Um...You- John said- You weren't pregnant?" Ben said feeling uncomfortable too.