Justin Bieber/Jason McCann Imagines | Book One

Please (Jason McCann)

The room was full of tension. So much that I felt I was suffocating. I wanted to run and hide, and scream and shout, but all I could do was stand still in my spot and let subtle tears fall.

"[Y/N]." My head snapped in the direction of Jason. He was being held back against the wall by two men that instantly, I realised wouldn't have been able to hold him back on their own. He stood with a worried expression on his face; one that I didn't see much of because he was always so sure of everything. In that moment, I realised how much I took advantage of his constant certainty because right then, seeing the look of worry on his face, made me doubt my strength not to break down and cry.

If things were different, and the intimidating figure wasn't stood in front of me, I'd run up to Jason and hug him, hold him so that the worried look would disappear from his face.
But the man was still stood there, no matter how many times I tried to blink it away. "[Y/N], don't listen to him. Whatever he has to say, it's bullshit." Jason was fidgeting, something I'd never seen him do before.

Previously, someone had burst into Jason's house, aggressively. So aggressive that I began to shake with no control of stopping. Everything happened so fast but all I took notice of were the guns gripped casually in their hands. "I have a few little facts about your precious boyfriend here that I think you'd care to hear." The smirk on his face wasn't like Jason's. Jason's smirk was testing and it made me certain he was about to say something cocky or smart, or he was about to give me the fucking of a lifetime. The one that was in front of me in that moment made me want to whimper and hide.

"[Y/N]," Justin was looking as though he wanted to approach me, staring into my eyes the best he could from the distance. I began to feel claustrophobic with the man so close to me, his breath on my mouth. "Baby, he's trying to get to you to get to me."

"Oh, shut the fuck up, Jason." The man rolled his eyes while shaking his head. "I'm just going to give you one or two notices about this man you think is so perfect and I'll be on my way." The gun twirled in his hand.

I tried not to shake, I tried not to cry but I failed at both.

"I'm sure you're aware of the drug business Jason is involved in, yes? If he hasn't let you in on that little secret then shit, are you in for a shock." He laughed evilly. The noise grated on me.
He turned to Jason. "Look how nervous he is, d'you think an innocent man would be looking as nervous as he is?" I sent him a glare and while I'm sure he noticed, he just smirked.

"Has he told you he has been more than aware about the death of many people in this business? Regular, innocent people?" I shook violently.

More tears fell as my eyes flicked from Jason to the bastard before me.
He moved closer suddenly, I heard Jason struggling against the hold he was in. "He's killed." The second the whispers were presented to my ears, my breath hitched. "Many times before you, and I'm sure there'll be many more times after you." The feeling of him so close to me made me sick, so much that I felt myself gag. "Isn't that right, Jason?" He turned to look at an angry Jason stood in the corner.

I hated angry Jason. He looked bad, and so much older than he actually was. His eyebrows became so much more prominent and his mouth rested on a line, I wanted to hug him and make it all go away.

But with the new information I had been given, whether it was true or not, I was reluctant. I stared at him for confirmation.

"C'mon, you can tell by the look on his face. I've killed too, the difference is, I admit it." He chuckled, leaving my space and walking over to Jason.

I heard him mutter something to Jason before nodding his head towards the door after looking at the two men. He walked out as they followed.

Jason and I were left alone once more, but this time, the air was filled with guilt and sadness. "[Y/N], ba-"

"Is it true?" My voice was weak, and even that made me want to cry. I didn't look at him as I waited for him to speak.

He was silent for what seemed like forever. I glanced up to see him nodding. I let out a sharp breath as I cried, I clutched my hand to my mouth.
I felt so many things at once. I felt betrayal because Jason had kept so much from me. I felt sickness because of how much I loved Jason and how much I didn't really know about him.

"[Y/N], he's done this on purpose. He knows you're my strongest point." He moved closer. "He's trying to bring me down by turning you against me." I noticed that worried look on his face again.

"Jason," I whispered, wiping my nose. "Tell me he's lying, tell me he's talking shit. Please." I wanted all of it to go away, my heart was breaking and I was instantly depending on Jason, as always, to make everything go away. But how could he make this better when he was the cause?

"..I can't." He sounded weak for what felt like the first time since I'd known him. "I wanted to tell you, I did. But I knew you wouldn't react well, I promise-"

"Do you realise how selfish that is?! You wanted to tell me but you knew there's a chance I'd leave, so you thought you'd hide the fact that you've killed people so you could keep a girlfriend!" I hissed at him, feeling mixed emotions towards him in that moment.

"Baby, please," His voice broke as he looked up at me with sad eyes. Tears were in his eyes. "I was protecting you from all of it; the less you know, the better." He was still against the wall where they left him, as though he was too scared to come near me.

"Well now I know." I muttered. "What now?" I asked myself more than I did him. I stared at him whilst he said nothing, he just looked at me carefully, like he was scared I was going to suddenly disappear. "I, uh, I need to go." I headed for the door.

"N-No, please, [Y/N]. You can't leave me. I can't do this without you, you know that. You're what keeps me sane, don't leave me." He sounded confused, as though all of this was happening out of his control and he didn't know what to do. He tried to get in my way but he noticed how I flinched. I could practically see his heart break through his facial expressions. "No. Don't. Please don't be scared of me." He seemed angry for a moment as he clenched his fists but it seemed to pass, as though he realised he had nothing to be angry at me for. "You're hurting me." He voice shook. He looked into my eyes that stared back helplessly.

My heart was breaking for him. But my heart was also breaking for myself and what I was having to go through all of a sudden. Everything was okay two hours ago and I was instantly wishing I had appreciated that time.

"Jason, I-I need time to think." I wanted to scream at him and plead for him to understand. But all I could do was let out barely functioning sentences.

"I know, I get that. You're in shock, okay? But I'm still Jason. I'm still the same person you love. I'm still the same Jason that comes home and does all that cliché shit that I hate but I do because I know it makes you happy, and that's all I want. I want you. Happy. With me." He was shaking at this point and I took pity on him.

My mind was already made up, no matter what he said. "I love you Jason, so much." His face seemed to soften. "but I can't be around you right now and I'm sorry. I'm scared, I need a break." I quickly put on my shoes as he watched, but he didnt move; I don't think he had the energy.

Jason had always been someone that was headstrong, he was committed and determined and so sure of everything. But seeing the state Jason was in, his body tense while he looked at me with innocent, questioning eyes, it was a first for me.

Finally feeling the fresh air on my face, I listened from the other side of the door. There was silence followed by a crash, and the smashing of glass. I stopped myself from turning back to him and taking him in my arms. I carried on walking. The sound of his pleas replayed in my mind.