❝Dangerous❞ » The Joker (IN DEEP EDITING AS OF APRIL 2024 CHANGES ARE HERE!!)

Chapter 39: broken

I didn't know what layout to do so sorry if it looks bad haha.

Alexis

It's been a few days since I ended things with J, it's not like we had a thing going but yeah I ended it anyways. He's been calling non stop, sending text messages on how he's going to track me down and how he desperately wants me to go home but I couldn't go home. I was too scared to go. I've been too busy taking care of Michael from how beaten up he really was and he keeps trying to convince me to move out of Gotham and throw my phone away. I didn't want to leave and he thought, once again, that I was an idiot and I was supposedly waiting for J which I wasn't. I thought about leaving Michael a couple of times, all he did was bring me down a bit and say that he's only doing it to make me get over J, like that's working anyways. I took a bite out of my food, staring out at the balcony as I hear my phone go off for the millionth time today. I put my phone on silent, tossing it aside and continues to eat alone. I roll my eyes once I hear the sliding door open and Michael sitting down beside me, sighing as well.
"How about we do something today? Get your mind off of things." I stare at him, giving him basically a death glare and started to shake my head repeatedly.
"I don't know, I'll think about it." I mumble, finishing my food and stands up before walking back inside the hotel room then clean some of my things up. I felt odd being around Michael, even after the many months of getting close and working with him, I still felt odd. It was weird.
"Alexis, I'm sorry about everything. I just want to make it better, please? I'll buy you ice cream." I look over at him, raising my eyebrow and continues to clean everything up.
"Fine, movie and ice cream. Sound good?" I mumble, running my fingers through my hair and sits down on the bed. He smiled wide at me, pulling me in a tight hug and eventually pulls back.
"Sounds good. Get snacks, ice cream and do a movie here?" I nodded my head and grabs my shoes to slide on along with my bag with my phone. I didn't use it but I always brought it just in case along with the gold pistol I still had, it had J carved on it and even though it bothered me I still kept it. I then glance down at my J tattoo on my wrist and shakes my head again, I was stupid, I was unbelievably so fucking stupid for thinking that things could work, for getting a tattoo, for kissing him, for liking him. I wanted to punch myself repeatedly for doing this to myself, I did this all myself, J was just there beating me down as well and I hated it but then again I miss him, I miss the cuddling, I miss when he took me on business trips and held me close in front of everyone, I miss how much he protected me. I missed him. I pound my head with my fist for a moment, just to try to get the thought out of my head and walked out of the hotel room with Michael.

"I'm sorry about calling you stupid, just hurts me to see you hurt over a guy that treats you like shit. I'll never treat you like that." He grabbed a hold of my hand and I let him hold it but it made me sad, it didn't feel like J's but he was right, he wouldn't treat me like shit, he treated me amazing and nice and I couldn't help but despise the fact that I rather have a crazy clown treat me bad than have a normal guy treat me like a princess. It was so stupid.
"It's fine. I am stupid, I admit that I was being an idiot for still wanting him. He's completely erased from my mind, trust me." I lied, smiling up at him and he smiled back. Once I looked away, I frowned and threw snacks in the shopping cart that he was pushing and stayed quiet, minding my business and barely listened to the stories he was telling me. I just didn't feel right here.
Once we got back to the hotel, i sat on the couch watching the boring movie that was playing and ate the snacks, I can feel Michael staring at me and I was a bit scared to look but I did anyways. He smiled, leaning in and I hesitated, holding back a sharp breath.
"Michael.. I don't like you like that." It slipped from my lips and I immediately regret it, I knew it was right to tell him the truth but it was wrong because he would think that it's about J, kinda is, kinda isn't but that doesn't matter. I seen him as a brother, as a close friend of mine, as  family, as my trainer. It was crazy to like him but it was also crazy to fall for a clown. Ha...
"Look, if it's because you still like him then it's okay. I'll give you time but please know I can treat you way better than him." I frown, looking away from him and sets the snacks down on the coffee table before standing up. I wasn't in the mood for a movie anymore, I wasn't in the mood to listen to Michael on how he can treat me so much better. I was tired of listening to it so I locked myself in the bathroom and took a long shower to get my mind off of everything but that sure didn't work, i was stuck in the shower thinking about every single thing that happened. I couldn't help but feel this way, feel this hurt and betrayed. I couldn't get the feeling to go away and that's what sucked about it. J would always comfort me if I felt like shit but Michael on the other hand is too blind to even see that I'm upset and that's what makes me more upset.
"Fuck." I mumble under my breath, tugging at my hair and leans my head against the shower wall.
"Why do I miss him so much?"

[______________________________]

Sorry for the short and depressing chapter. I kinda wanted to make this one more about what Alexis is feeling first off, comparing Michael and J from her point of view. The next chapter would most likely be J's point of view on missing her.
Then I'll try something new on the chapter after that.
I hope you guys enjoy this small chapter and I'll see you guys next time.
Love ya lots xx

Question # 3:

Do you think it's stupid for Alexis to just sit around and be sad about J when Mikey, who can treat her right, can make her happier?
Guess on how J feels about Alexis not being there. xx

Word count: 1202