I Knew By Two

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By Sarrako Kausato

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It was the middle of the eighth grade when I met my first crush of that year. She was beautiful. She was 5' 9" and thin. Yet curvy at the same time. My best friend also liked her with out a doubt. But we went on with life as if we were just friends. She of course was Asexual. Or so she told us.

I still liked her when my best friend decided to ask her out. He was rejected so I decided not to even to ask her. But after a few days, her friendship with my best friend was back to normal. But something inside me was brewing. I wasn't sure what it was at that time but I knew it ran deep through my veins.

It was June now and the feelings I felt for my now lesbian friend have been and gone, but the feeling I don't understand still have lingered for the last two months. But I never tried to follow them. Until my best friends ex-girlfriend committed suicide and that sent him in a spiral of shame. He felt responsible for her death and it was then I realized my feelings for him. After he had the nightmare that our school turned against him and that we abandoned him. I felt sorrow for him and utter love for him too.

I told my lesbian friend and a couple of other bisexuals that were in my group of close friends and they told me to tell him. And after two weeks of being persuaded, I told him and he didn't say anything. It took til that night to get an answer from him. He said no but nothing was changed between us. We still hang out often and still spend the night at each other's house.

When I was ready. I came out to my mom and dad. They were never married so I didn't think it would be a problem. But I was wrong. My mom excepted me for being Bisexual and everything. My dad said no child of his was gonna participate in such homophobic activities. And with that, he stormed out of my house and out of my life. And I was happy that he did.

The pride parades are amazing and I've learned a lot from the lgbtq community when ever me and my friends were down there. My father tried many times to send me of to be "straightened" out, but I always refused and had my friends. But ever since I knew of my sexuality, I've built up a wall between some people and knocked walls down with others. My life is perfect most times and I am happy.

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