𝗧𝗼𝗺𝗼𝗿𝗿𝗼𝘄'𝘀 𝗟𝗮𝘀𝘁 𝗕𝗿𝗲𝗮𝘁𝗵 | an apocalyptic novel ©

Chapter 91

When my World tears apart

2035

Valencia

This is so fucking stupid!

My breath is ragged. I conquered the subway stations - I'm back in the Bronx, after one night at the shopping mall. It's just the same way we went, but reversed.

I managed, despite all the barricades and blockage, and I still don't know how. But right now, I am at the biggest challenge. There is no way that I can go over the crane again - for one because there is no way back to it, and because this time, no hand will be outstretched in my direction to hold on to lead me across.

I am in the construction site building with the steps intact. Lost in thoughts, I look out of the bare frames where windows would have been put in. Now, after knowing it has been 40 years, the state of everything being so overgrown makes sense. That is why Aidan has asked me if I said nine years.

My heart burns.

The construction site is free under the crane, the hole gaping down to the garage is the only issue. I could just walk over to the other building and jump over the hole. No, Aidan must have had a reason to go over the crane in the first place.

I swear under my breath, when I run up the stairs of the building, to the rooftop, to where the crane abruptly ends.

I estimate the distance between me and the end of the crane.

Why am I doing that? It's useless.

Almost frantic, I look around for something. Sure enough, there is no conveniently placed ladder, rope or chain. I don't live in a fairy tale where I wish for something and I don't live in a fairy tale where I can wish for a Prince Charming.

With a sigh, I look back up to the sky. The weather is gray, like it was when we left the Bronx - low-hanging clouds, rain.

I bite my lip and walk over to the edge of the rooftop, to inspect the hole to the garage from the top. The height difference makes my head dizzy.

The hole is big, reaching almost all the way to the side of the opposite building, up to the fence we jumped over. An excavator is barely hanging on the edge of the building I am standing on right now, somewhat suspended while at the same time standing on a pile of building gravel.

There is no way this could work. But it's worth a shot. My feet automatically move, leading me back down the stairs of the building. Now, I am again staring out through the bare window frames toward the hole, on the ground floor.

"Fuck it," I mumble to myself and climb out, marching straight forward. Every step I take is hesitant as if my mind lets me know that the ground I am walking on could give in at any moment. That thought isn't comforting. Eventually, I stand in front of the hole, looking down into a dark void.

My mind already draws out how to jump and where to jump to continue my way. After a moment of overthinking the possibility of death, my decision has been made.

The excavator aches when I climb on it. I don't have much time to decide where I should jump, since the undercarriage of the vehicle starts to roll back, with me on it.

Without a second thought, I jump on the pile of gravel. My landing is awkward and inelegant, my feet barely find balance.

"Breathe, Valencia," I urge myself, subconsciously repeating the words Aidan had said to me when we climbed the crane.

Fuck him.

I managed, just in time, because the excavator slowly slips down toward the garage. Struggling up the pile of gravel, my hands find the ledge of the concrete. Every step I take is tough. I take one and slip back two more. My nails dig into the concrete after I finally reached the top. I grind my teeth when I pull up and swing my leg over the ledge.

Suddenly, a loud noise startles me, causing me to almost lose grip. I don't dare to look back, I don't look down.

But as soon as my feet touch the solid ground, I catch my breath and dare to take a hesitant look at where the noise came from.

The excavator has disappeared. My eyes try to find the chipped yellow color, and I spot it at the very bottom of the void.

It fell, causing the loud noise. Luckily, I wasn't standing on it anymore.

At this point, I am depending on sheer luck here.

A harsh breath escapes my lips. I can do it, I can make it - I just need to jump over the fence and walk along the street until I find my neighborhood. And then, I will look for the shelter.

I raise my head to look up at the clouds hanging lower and lower, the construction site building with the crumbling stairs now crowding my vision.

I don't know how Aidan managed to conquer all of what was in front of us before we went to Manhattan, since he said he was there before.

I catch myself realizing it is the first time I have spent a thought on him. There is no need to. We are done.

I shake my head, when I reach the construction site fence, I still shake my head when I link my fingers into the mesh, and I still shake my head when my feet drop on the ground opposite of it.

Aidan's concrete bunker is right in front of me. It took me a little longer to get here, but it's still today - late midday perhaps.

I hope Henry is okay, I don't know what I would do if he wasn't.

"The door to the bunker is open if that's what you're getting at."

I wasn't getting at that.

My fingers tremble as I grab the wheel locking the door. I take a deep breath and twist it. Three times, counterclockwise.

To my surprise, it opens. Aidan told the truth. Again. Why was I so mad at him? I regret it. All he ever wanted me to know was the truth. And I pushed him back further.

Focus.

The inside is silent and dark, the only source of light is the little sunlight trickling through the small window in the concrete wall of the shelter. Everything looks the same as when we left.

"Henry!" I softly call out my brother's name as I make my way to the back room where I put him on the sofa.

He doesn't respond. I didn't expect him to, he might be asleep.

Henry, I made it. You wouldn't believe it, but I got you medicine. We will go home, you will be okay. Henry, I am here.

But when I enter the back room and see my brother turned with his back toward me, I stop dead in my tracks.

His shape underneath the blanket doesn't rise, nor does it fall.

My steps get hesitant, my breath ragged, and my ears start to ring when I walk over. My heart slows, I think it stopped beating.

Because the only thought in my mind screams "What have you allowed to happen?!".

What have you allowed to happen? Valencia, how could you let this happen? Valencia, how dare you!

I feel my eyes start to burn like someone rubbed salt into them.

Everything becomes numb and colorless. I can't feel my skin, I can't feel my legs, I can't feel the tears making my cheeks wet, I can only feel my ragged breath and my heart standing still.

Because I have lost. I don't know if I am screaming, crying or staying completely quiet, I just know that I have lost. When I stretch my hand out to feel my brother's hand lying on the blanket next to his stuffed cow plush and realize how cold-cold-cold he is, another thought makes itself present.

I have lost. I gained something at the cost of something very dear to me.

A cry forms itself in the back of my throat as sobs escape my lips, I let it out and cover my mouth in shock, despite myself, in horror, in sadness and in grief while my knees buckle under me and I sink to the floor.

This isn't happening, no, no, no, no!

"No, Henry, no- don't do this to me! Don't do this to me! Wake up," I wince.

My heart shatters and my stomach twists. I don't know how long I am staying like this.

But it isn't of importance anymore.

Then, the world crashes down on me.