"we will struggle
not the way people do
and you will hurt me
but not the way everyone else can
and you will love me
harder than anything I've ever known
and I will need you
it will be strong and terrifying
and I will listen
even if it's the sadde...
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Naomi July 15, 2009 Tappahannock, Virginia
"I thought if we make it out alive You might end up by my side Guess we'll have to wait and see If you'll find your way to me"
"So...you and Chris?"
I turned my head to smile at Skye, shaking my head at the suggestive look on her face. We were having a little pool party at Chris' estate, just to relax and bring everybody together to have a good time, and she and I were both seated around the pool with our feet in the water. Tone was working the grill while Mijo, Raven, Aaron, and Rob were playing a loud ass game of spades. Chris, Kenya and Keeis were the only ones in the pool, and I was nervously watching while Chris patiently guided CJ through the water with his floaties on.
I was just happy to see everybody having a good time. Chris has been way better the last few weeks— after Michael Jackson died he decided he wasn't going to drag his feet with getting back to work, so he's been taking quick trips to Miami to record some music. I was actually going with him on his next one, since he asked.
"Nope, nothings going on." After my breakup, I really just needed to be alone. These men were pulling me in 100 different directions the last couple years and I'm honestly just sick of it. I was taking Daddy's advice and taking some time for myself. Chris knew that...he understood. I don't think he's ready to jump back into something with me either, honestly. I could tell he kinda wasn't over Robyn, no matter how much he tried to act like it. Call it guilt, or whatever, but he wanted to see her. "No time soon."
"But you're single...he's single."
"We've both been single for like...two minutes. I think we just need to be friends to each other right now." I shrugged, reaching over and picking up my cup, sipping my drink but eyeing her over the rim. "Not like how you and Mijo are 'friends' girl."
When I got back from New York, me and the girls met up at Raven's and I had my big breakdown about Kyle and the whole break up. As the night went on, tears dried up, drinks were poured and Skye told us all about her little fuck buddy situation with Mijo. None of us could believe it. But she kept saying it wasn't serious, and we were happy to see her enjoying herself. Skye wasn't the type that you'd think was capable of casual sex, she was always so determined to find a prince with a castle fairytale, but the two of them seemed fine.
"Oh my God, please." She laughed, covering her face in embarrassment. "He's a good friend."
"I see that." I giggled, playfully bumping her shoulder with mine. "But seriously...you're happy? I know you said there's no feelings involved but that's not like you at all. You used to always say you would only have sex with the man you wanted to marry."
