"we will struggle
not the way people do
and you will hurt me
but not the way everyone else can
and you will love me
harder than anything I've ever known
and I will need you
it will be strong and terrifying
and I will listen
even if it's the sadde...
Ups! Tento obrázek porušuje naše pokyny k obsahu. Před publikováním ho, prosím, buď odstraň, nebo nahraď jiným.
Chris August 25th, 2009 Harlem, NY
"Playing house not okay even when you found a perfect lover Overfill and we manage to spill what we have Going under All the time that we spend lookin' for a revelation Waiting on some confirmation We in it, then we out How you call that dedication? Feel like it's on purpose lately I'm actin' like this shit don't faze me Miscommunication fucking up the vibration"
Hiding in VA was cool while it lasted, but a nigga had to come back to life at some point. That point is now.
We stayed home long enough to celebrate Nae's 20th birthday with her pops and her friends, then we both got on a private flight back to New York with our son. School was starting for her in one week, and while she prepared for that, I started the process of moving out of my crib in Jersey so that I could put it back on the market as soon as possible.
I ain't been excited about a lot of shit lately, but I was ready to move to the West Coast. I knew Nae hated it and she wanted me to stay close, but I wasn't no more than a flight away. It seemed like a world apart to her, but it's not as bad as she thinks. She'll see that. And eventually I think I'll be able to talk her into moving in with me too.
Things between us been great the last couple months. We ain't really been fighting, except for our normal little petty arguments. Sometimes we laid in bed all night and just talked...crying, laughing, reminiscing. It felt good to have her back in my life without her having all them walls up, just letting me see her for the first time in years. I felt like I was falling in love with her all over again. But this time was even better.
I just wanted her to be mine again, I ain't give a fuck how fast it was. I love her and I want her. Forever. But no matter what I say I can't get her to change her mind.
I don't know what kinda game she's playing, but she need to save all this hard to get shit for another nigga. We been together for 9 years, I know her already— I know what makes her mad, what makes her sad, all her habits, her fucking sleeping patterns. I knew this damn girls scent by now.
So I know when she's fronting.
The only thing I don't know is what the fuck we beating around the bush for! We both had breakups to get over, we could do that together. But every time I tried to get closer she pushed me away. It always came with some mature ass excuse about how she needs space, how she's focusing on herself right now.
I'm focusing on myself too but that ain't mean I couldn't focus on us at the same time. I feel like there's something, some other reason, she's not telling me. Instead of just saying what's really going on she rather both of us just be out here single. I don't get it.
