"we will struggle
not the way people do
and you will hurt me
but not the way everyone else can
and you will love me
harder than anything I've ever known
and I will need you
it will be strong and terrifying
and I will listen
even if it's the sadde...
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chris
"We can't fuck it away, we can't tuck it away We can't drink it away, Hennessy it away We can't fight it away, can't one night it away Too much pride in the way."
After we got through fucking we sat there in silence for a while. She ain't speak...I ain't speak, but it was comfortable. I kissed and nibbled on her neck while she caught her breath, feeling the rhythm of her chest rising and falling. I wasn't ready to separate from her. I lifted her arms up around my neck, before I laid my hands on her ass and massaged it. All in silence. I just wanted to taste and touch all over her body. This was home.
I don't know what came over me tonight...I was yearning for her. I never wanted to stop making love to her. I wanted to watch her cum over and over and over again.
I was sure she was covered in hickies by now, and I lowered my head to gently suck her hard nipples. They was full of milk, but I couldn't help but kiss on them. The only thing that made me lift my head up and look at her was the sound of sniffling. I popped up, immediately worried when I saw tears in her eyes.
"Baby why you crying? I ain't hurt you right?"
"No." She answered quietly, shaking her head as I wiped her tears. "Chris you need to go."
"What?"
"You need to leave. You can't stay here tonight."
"Nae...you tripping, just relax. I'm still inside you and you tryna kick me out. What you on right now?"
"I need you to go. Please."
She eased off of me, standing and wrapping the blanket she kept on the couch around her body. Before I could even stop her she ran upstairs, hiding from me. The little devil on my shoulder told me to go after her— we had a lot of lost time to make up for and once she stopped tripping I still had two rounds left in me tonight.
But my right mind told me to give her a minute alone. This whole shit caught her off guard...I know that. She probably emotional right now.
I got dressed and threw myself down on the couch, staring up at the ceiling while I waited this little attitude out. I dug in my pants pocket for my phone, ignoring the calls and texts from Robyn, and hitting Mijo to cover for me in case she asked him where I was at.
Honestly, she was tripping for no reason tonight. I kinda assumed she ain't like Nae...maybe she was intimidated by her or something, but she was making a bigger deal out of shit than she needed to. How am I wrong for wanting to make sure the mother of my child gets home safe? It's like I'm damned if I do, damned if I don't. Sure, me and Nae used to argue a lot before we broke up, but at least she got mad over shit that made sense most of the time.
I'm impatient, I couldn't wait more than a couple minutes before I followed Nae upstairs. Like I thought, she was in her bedroom, just sitting on her bed with her head in her hands. I couldn't believe she was tripping like this. I knew she felt bad because I had a girlfriend, but if the roles were reversed and she had a man, I wouldn't give not one fuck about him. Not when it comes to us. "Over" ain't over with us.
