Shorter Than Me

11 Ecyn

Dren squeezes me once more, and we stand up. I try to calm myself. I can do this. I can kill titans. I just need to stay near Ackerman or Captain Levi so they can protect me. That's a selfish thought. I look down and see all the titans.

I swallow and force myself to breathe. I feel my heart slamming against my ribs and my hands shake. I know there is nothing I can do to calm myself. I try to relax, but my muscles tighten in fear.

I also have to remind myself to breathe.

"Ecyn." Dren speaks next to me. His voice sounds nervous. "Don't be scared. You're the best titan-killer I know. Just let your instincts control you. We're going to be fine. This is what we were trained to do. We can do it." I feel like he's trying to reassure himself as much as me.

"You too. Don't get too scared." I'm embarrassed at the frightened waver in my voice. He takes my hand and we stand on the branch, awaiting Commander Erwin's order.

We don't talk for however long we wait.

"Scouts!" My heart skips a few beats and my breathing stops. "Descend and attack!"

Captain Levi jumps, and so do the rest of my squad. Dren jumps too, and I'm quick to follow him. I hear his voice but the words can't register in my brain as I plummet to my death.

I look around for a titan that I can kill easily. I follow Dren as he heads for a titan that's sitting down. I move in front of it to distract it and have to avoid three hands reaching out to me. My mouth is open and I'm screaming slightly with every exhale, but Dren kills the titan. In almost no time at all, titan steam fills the clearing. It's a little hard to see. I help others kill more titans. I could swear my heart has stopped beating. My breath comes in gasps because I'm holding it involuntarily. I manage to kill one titan, and that makes me more confident. The Scout that was having trouble glances at me in gratitude and a strange feeling fills me.

But I don't have time to think about it because a big gust of wind tears through the forest and clears a lot of the steam.

That's when I see, not ten yards away from me, Dren's head.

Just his head.

Then it disappears.

For a second, I can't comprehend what I saw, but I see the titan gulp and I know.

It wasn't Dren. Did I really see his face that clearly?

Yes. I did. It was Dren. Then it wasn't.

My arms fall to my sides as my breathing stops again.

My lungs heave for air but my body won't let any in for some reason.

My body goes limp so that I'm hanging from one cable.

My throat swells and chokes me.

I hang here, choking, gagging, staring.

Dren. He was with me five minutes ago. He was breathing fifteen seconds ago. He was alive fifteen seconds ago. He was. But not anymore.

A blur whizzes past the titan's neck and it's dead in a squirt of blood. The blur slams into me and I can breathe again. An arm holds me by the stomach and pulls me backward and up. I'm like a doll. I can't move.

Now, far above the titans, the person holding me stops. He moves me around until his arm is wrapped around my waist, holding me up.

"Guiin! Guiin!" he screams at me.

Now that I can breathe, my breaths come in short, fast bursts. I can't focus on anything. "D-Dre-en," I'm able to get out.

"He's dead. Stop panicking."

I wheeze a little.

Suddenly, my head snaps to the side and my cheek starts stinging. The sound of a loud slap follows. "Guiin! Wake up! Snap the f*** out of it! F***ing calm down!"

My cheek stings and I hear the yelling in my ear.

"Whatever. Die." I feel the arm slip away from my body and I feel myself falling. The figure above me races down past me.

I'm falling. I move my leg automatically and my finger pulls the trigger. I release the cable and shoot the other one. My descent stops and I look down. About twenty feet below me are a whole lot of titans.

What do I do? I see a titan holding a Scout in his hand. I shoot a cable at his neck and fly as fast as I can toward it. I put the blades in the right position and lock my arms into place. The chunk of flesh comes out easily, and steaming blood lands on my face and shirt. A voice in the back of my head warns me that Captain Levi might get mad at me but I ignore it.

I fly close to the ground and cut two titans' heels. I rise up farther as another Scout takes care of their napes and see the clearing. There are more Scouts in distress than dead titans.

"FALL BACK! RETREAT!" I hear the commander's voice and relief fills me. I glance around for someone in my squad.

An emotion tries to force it's way into my mind but I shove it down as hard as I can. Forget everything, I order myself. I see Kerstein and head to him. He glances at me and I see the panic in his eyes. Together, we head as fast as we can to where we tied up our horses.

Yeah they did that. I forgot to include it.

Captain Levi is waiting there. Ackerman, Jaeger, and Arlert are a few seconds behind us. We land on the horses and speed away, following Captain Levi as fast as we can.

When we exit the forest, a large flash of light is set off to indicate where the commander is. His position is at the front center of the formation and it allows us to find our places.

Now that we're in full retreat, I have a chance to relax and sorrow explodes in my chest. Sobs shake my body and tears pour out of my eyes as I see his face over and over and over disappearing down the titan's throat. It tears my heart apart.

Please tell me you didn't see that coming. I feel like it was kind of obvious what was going to happen. It is a LevixEcyn story.

So while writing this part I had to:
Hyperventilate
Hold my breath
Convulse
Make faces
Slap myself (this was not sucessful in giving me a good picture of the feeling because I probably didn't slap myself hard enough. Saying it stings is probably good enough.)

I love being a writer! Have a good day!

(The picture is from the anime and edited with the app Pixlr.)