Shorter Than Me

30 Ecyn

I get home around the time everyone starts heading to bed. I walk to my room and put my things inside. I'm about to start getting ready for bed, but I think it would be better to talk with Ackerman at night rather than the daytime. Then no one knows I'm actually going to see him.

I stand in front of his door, taking deep breaths and raising my hand to knock at least three times. How do I even begin to bring this kind of thing up? It's Ackerman. Eventually, I tell myself I'm wasting time. Then I knock.

He opens the door.

"Hello," he says.

"Hello." I stand awkwardly. After a small second of silence, I say, "Can I come in?"

He just steps back to let me in, not giving any expression to me at all. He closes the door and my level of nervousness jumps even higher.

"So...um..." I can't look in his eyes.

"What do you want?"

I look up to his face. "What do you mean, what do I want?"

"I mean what do you want?"

His expression stays annoyingly blank.

"You know why I'm here." I try to keep my voice low. "Because of what happened on the expedition. You kissed me." Saying it out loud is weird. And it sounds so wrong as I look into his eyes. My view of Ackerman has changed since I first met him, but not that much.

"I know."

"So... What does that mean?"

"It doesn't mean anything."

I scoff. "You expect me to believe that."

"Yes." He stays calm, but I'm getting upset at him. "And don't talk so loudly."

I become aware of my voice's volume and try to make it quieter again. "Of course it means something. You kissed me."

"Just forget it."

"Stop it!" I exclaim in a whisper. "Stop acting like it's nothing. I want to know why Captain Levi Ackerman, humanity's strongest soldier," I gesture to him, "kissed me." I point to myself.

"I said," he pauses and looks straight in my eyes, "Forget about it."

"Do you really expect that to happen?"

"I'm going to, and you should too."

"That's not possible," I object, appalled that he would just blow it off like it was nothing. It was not nothing.

"I'm doing it," he points out.

He is really trying my patience. He can't expect me to forget it. He can't. "I'm not you."

"It was a mistake, Guiin. Forget it," he says more forcefully.

"What the hell, Ackerman?" I forget to watch my volume, and it gets more emotional.

He steps forward and grabs my arm intimidatingly. Maybe I still have emotions from when he was training me, because I feel terrified he's going to hurt me. He speaks slowly, emphasizing each word. "I'm sorry. I made a mistake. Now leave and forget it ever happened." Without waiting for my response, he opens the door and half-forces me out.

"Ackerman-" is all I'm able to get out before the door closes in my face.

I stare at the door in shock that he would do that. How could he be so rude? He's not the Ackerman I thought I knew. He's someone else completely. I thought I was getting to know him, but now he kisses me and tells me to forget about it. How can he possibly think that's alright?

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