Fields of Gold; Daniel Ricciardo

Darkness

'You never arrived in our arms, but we hold you in our hearts forever'
Daniel and I were blessed for a couple of weeks by our little miracle, and it breaks our heart that we didn't get more time.
Please give us time and space to grief our loss.

Tears are streaming down my face writing this, when I'm done I show Kelly and Charlotte and they both start crying as well.
"That's beautiful Sky." Charlotte says when she reads it.

I take a screenshot and send it to Daniel before posting it and he sends me back a broken heart emoji, but right after that 'perfect!'
So I tag Daniel in it and post it.
I put my phone away, I don't really want to see what comments come in right away. I'm sure most will be really sweet though.

"Girls, can one of you pick me up tomorrow to go to the paddock. I know Daniel wants me to stay here, but I really want to be there for him so he can't know."
Kelly nods, "sure I'll pick you up, are you sure? Shouldn't you take some rest?"

"No I can rest before you pick me up and we will probably fly home tomorrow afterwards so I can sleep during the flight. I really want to be there for Daniel. Although maybe I shouldn't show myself before he starts. Because I don't want him to worry about me during the race." 
I bite my lip thinking about what's the best idea for tomorrow.

"Want to watch FP3?" Charlotte interrupts my thoughts.
"Yes absolutely, it's raining so it might be chaos." We sit back with the chocolate and something to drink and I can actually relax a bit and take my mind off everything.

After quali they go back to their rooms to wait for Max and Charles to come back.
I decide to lie down for a couple of minutes so I can hopefully have some dinner with Daniel when he gets back. But first I have to go to the bathroom, I notice I am actually a bit shaky opening the door, but as I already knew the room is clean so there's nothing there to remind me of yesterday. I quickly go to the toilet and I see the bleeding is definitely getting less already.

I'm still in Daniels clothes, but I kinda like it, makes me feel like he's close to me. I wash my hands and then lie down in bed with my phone.
I decide to open Instagram to see the reactions and I have never seen so many comments in such a short time. It's an out poor of love and support, I feel the tears running down my face again when I see numerous women who react that they went through the same thing and how thankful they are that we opened up about it.
I don't understand why we wouldn't, it's nothing to be ashamed off and as it seems it happens to so many women, I think it's a good thing to talk about it.

It warms my heart to read all the messages, after a while I feel my eyes getting tired and I put my phone away. Before I know it I've drifted off to sleep and when I wake up it's dark, but I don't see Daniel around. When I get up he's not in the room either.
"Where the hell are you Daniel?" I wonder out loud.
When I check my phone I see it's 8 o'clock in the evening, I would think he would be back by now.
My stomach is rumbling like crazy, which isn't weird because all I had today was Michaels smoothies and chocolate.

I call Daniel to figure out where he is.
"Sky? What's going on?" Is the first thing he says when he picks up.
"Nothing, I just woke up and you're not back yet. Are you still at the track?"

"No I'm with Michael just going through things for tomorrow. I'll be back later." He sounds so distant I really don't understand what's going on.
"I'm starving so I'm going to eat, did you eat yet?" I ask him.
"Yeah I did with Michael, but you should definitely eat something. I was in the room shortly but you were sleeping so I didn't want to wake you."
I'm really disappointed that he didn't, because then at least we could have dinner together, but I guess he did what he felt was right.
"Oh, right ok. Sure I'll get something myself. When will you be back?"