Chapter 1

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Hero

"Good morning or good evening, I don't know what time it is with you..." a blond, bespectacled lady, a Cosmopolitan journalist, smiles at me. The first of a long series.

"Good morning..." I answer her, switching off the microphone soon after.I look at the programme Jamie, my manager, sent me and count the interviews."Fuck, seven? Oh my God..." I sigh, checking that I've turned the microphone off.

"Let's wait for Josephine and Dylan and then we'll start..." she informs me.

I will see her again. Today, after a good three months, I will see her again.We've only been in touch, in a manner of speaking, via the WhatsApp groups of the entire cast of After, never privately me and her. Not that I haven't tried eh. I sent her messages, just to see how she was doing but beyond an "Ok..." or "All good..." I never received anything else!

I've decided to try and reconnect with her but I certainly won't force her to do anything she doesn't want to, let alone love me! I have to laugh just thinking about it. It didn't work, we'll go our separate ways!I sigh as I look at the black screen, watching Felix pacing around the living room chatting on his mobile phone.Just before the lock down he moved in with me and he's practically my flatmate now, even now that London is slowly returning to life as much as possible.

"Hey, I'm going to have to start soon..." I motion to him to move to another room and he nods on his way out...

"You want chips?" he returns to the room for a moment, handing me a packet.I smile "No, thanks... later maybe yes!" "Okay, FT..." he exits continuing to talk to I don't know who.

The work for me, both as a model and as an actor, is stationary indeed... very stationary!
So these interviews, although boring as hell, make me feel a little closer to normalcy.

"Hey Hardin!!!" comes Dylan's voice before his image even appears on the screen.

"There he is! The latecomer!!!" I tease him as I settle into my chair.The reporter can't even be seen anymore, she has removed both the camera and the microphone. Was I that early?

"It's 5 o'clock in the morning at my place... never mind!" he yawns "What one doesn't do for work!!!"

"Barbara, how is she?"

I've missed this guy, even though we've been in touch a lot these months.

"Good, actually... better than me, since she's sleeping!" he bursts out laughing " And Jo? what happened to her?"

"Late, as usual..." I smile lowering my gaze and Dylan watches me thoughtfully.


"You...ok, nothing!"

Better not to say anything in front of the reporters, that would be the scoop they've been looking for for years.
 Although actually there's nothing to say, except that we hardly talk to each other anymore!

"Here I am!!! Is it on?" Her voice echoes in the room of my house and my heart beats very fast. I look at my image on the screen, hoping I am at least presentable! I'm dressed as if I'm going out on a date, even though I know I'm not going anywhere but... okay, the idea of seeing her again has me freaking out!I know, I said earlier that I'd just be friends with her. Stratospheric lie that I can't even tell myself!!! But it's true that I can't help it if she doesn't want to have anything to do with me!

The image of the girl who makes my heart beat wildly appears on the screen and takes my breath away.She's wearing a simple black T-shirt and her hair up and she's simply beautiful.
How much I want to tell her... I really do!

"Hey Jo!" smiles Dylan "Welcome!""Me and technology don't get along..." she huffs pressing keys on the computer in front of her "I can't hear you...""Turn it up!" Dylan mimes with his hands to press the sound button and she looks at him questioningly."What? Wait... Mia!!! Can you come here for a second please?" she shouts facing a distant point.

Her friend appears in the frame and waves to us "The old lady is impeded..." she teases her as she sets up the computer in a few moves and Jo pats her on the back "I'm not impeded, this thing does what it wants!" she snorts.

"That contraption is called a Computer, Langford updated..." she laughs as she disappears from our sight "Hi guys!!!" we hear her shout.

"Now get lost!!!" she whispers to her laughing without hardly moving her lips.Apparently they live together now, a bit like me and Felix and it makes me smile.
At least neither of us is alone, especially now in this complicated situation.

"Well, can we start?" the journalist appears again and we begin our round of questions.Can I just say that I hadn't missed this at all?Luckily Dylan is here and we can get a hand in answering.

"Thank you very much all three of you, you've been really nice... stay on the line and one of my colleagues will be linking up shortly, Okay?" smiles Kate, the journalist, at us.

We say goodbye and remain the three of us alone again, as if locked in a room."I'm sleepy..." begins Dylan to break the silence that has suddenly been created "What time is it with you?

"It's 1.30 at my place I'm rather hungry..." I laugh feeling my stomach growl.

"Dylan I live in LA now too, remember?" smiles Jo settling back in her chair "So I understand you're sleepy..." she yawns and I reflexively follow her too.

"What's Mia doing up at this hour?" I ask almost intruding on their conversation.

"She has an interview too..." cuts Jo short without adding anything else.There, it sounded too good to be true. She still doesn't want to talk to me and that's perfect, don't you think?

"How's the tomato production going?" laughs Dylan trying to steer the conversation towards neutral ground.

"Failed miserably..." she smiles at him "I'm trying garlic and it seems easier..."

"You know what a stench there will be on your balcony!" teases Dylan.

I watch them laughing and joking, almost as if I were not here in front of them and I can no longer say a single word.

The next journalist quickly comes online and we start again with the slew of questions all the same.By now we've become experts in "it's because of the casting" or "we're all great friends" except for her and me, we should add, but we omit that part...

I try not to look at her but I can't help it, especially now that she can't know if I'm looking at her or not... I wonder if she is looking at me or is she focused on something else?

The second interview also ends and we stay there, in line waiting..."Guys I have to eat something or I'll pass out..." Dylan gets up from his chair "I'll be right back..." the camera stays still with an image of his living room, with a big sofa and a giant TV right in front of it.

Oh, good... it's just the two of us left...

I look at the schedule and the next interview should start in less than five minutes..."Um..." I run a hand through my hair "So..."

"I think I'm going to go for a quick bite to eat too..." Jo stands up, almost as if she wants to run away "I'll be right back..." she turns off the camera and mutes the sound.

"Okay..." I sigh and run a hand over my face, closing my eyes "This is harder than I could even imagine..."

"Felix... are there any chips left?" I shout towards the kitchen door he closed behind him earlierHe appears a few seconds later and throws the package directly at me on the table."Delivery service!" he bursts out laughing and disappears again.

"Oh God now I'm craving fries!" exclaims Dylan as he returns to his seat."We live a bit far away... if you want I'll send them to you!" I show him the package.

"Jo where is she?" he asks.

I shrug my shoulders and take a chip putting it in my mouth. I'm hungry as hell, but this still seems to be going on for a long time.We'll have two more interviews before a one-hour break!

"If I sit here all day, I'll have a chair-shaped ass!" comments Dylan almost to himself as he looks around.

"Me too... next time I'll get on the couch!"

"I'm already there!" interjects Jo turning everything back on "I've changed locations..." she smiles.

"So if we hear snoring in a bit, we definitely know who it is..." teases Dylan and I laugh with him.

"Funny...really!"

"So, let's get serious..." he recomposes himself "The first person who can fit Burrito into an answer to the next questions wins...I don't know what, just wins!" he looks at us amused.

"I'm in! do we really have to say Burrito?" I ask.

"Yes, otherwise it doesn't count..."

At least the next interview will be a little bit more fun."Good idea! Also because if we don't play a bit, I'm in serious danger of falling asleep!" yawns Jo again.

Through it all, I hardly managed to say a word to her.... Bravo Hero, congratulations!
The confident guy, calm in every situation, where exactly is he? Because I don't see him here.

"So, how are you?" I ask trying to start a conversation "How's it going over there?"

"Pretty well I'd say... So far we're a lot freer than you lot in Europe apparently!" comments Dylan and Jo just nods.

"It doesn't take long... everything is closed here!" I snort.

"Let's hope it passes quickly..." he sighs.

"But I'm fine at home, relaxing..." begins Jo with an amused smile "You have to see the positive side of it too, in the midst of all the pain and fear..."

She is the antithesis of sociability and a bit I have to say I am too...

"It's actually not so bad... except that I have to share the house with a crazy guy who leaves socks and underwear everywhere!"

"Hey I hear you huh!!!" shouts Felix from the other room.

"Tell me about it... Mia, on the other hand, is a neat freak, I can't leave a pen out of place and she comes by like a tornado!" she smiles, probably thinking about who knows what anecdote that happened during these months of lock down.

It may not be much, but at least it spoke to me. I already feel like an achievement!

"Want to swap?" I laugh.She remains silent and sighs, looking away. Suddenly I'm afraid I've said some bullshit, but I don't understand what exactly.

"Gladly!!!" I hear yelling from Jo's house "I'm packing!!!"

I smile at Mia's exuberance, I've always liked her even though I only got to know her through the endless phone calls she and Jo used to make while we were shooting the film.

The third journalist of the day appears on the screen and we get serious again, or at least try to, since we have decided to play this game of Burrito!

Jo is the first to manage to respond with that word and smiles triumphantly as she finishes her speech! Dylan and I follow her around smiling, just before I explain to the reporter what a stupid game we are playing, before she really takes us for fools!

The day finally comes to a stop when, before the final three interviews, they give us time to relax and eat, as we have a two-hour break.

"Well guys... see you later then!" Jo hurries to close and I don't have time to say goodbye as the screen goes black and only Dylan and I remain.

He looks at me with a half-smile: he knows what happened between us and he's a good friend, clearly he'd like to help me but it's difficult in this situation and condition..."Everything will be fine..." he tells me.

"I've heard that sentence before..." I play it down "and it doesn't seem to me that everything went well..."

We end the call and I stay for a moment looking at the descktop of my computer...
A picture of me and Jo shooting the film...It's pathetic I know, since we broke up and don't talk to each other.... But I can't help but think that it wasn't supposed to be this way, that there had to be another chance for us...

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