48. The Ultimatum

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Snape was slowly becoming a shell of his former self, and even if no one chose to believe it, so was Dumbledore.  Both men were harboring a secret so painful and terrible, that they didn't want anyone else to know.  But at the same time, they didn't want to be the only ones dealing with it.  Or handling it.  The more people who carried a burden the lesser it would be, they had both been taught.  But what was the reaction going to be.  

Was it going to be met with scorn and anger, or was there going to be pity and sympathy.  Merlin knows that they needed neither.  They needed support and understanding, and if they got that, the rest of the journey would be met with ease and a certain amount of grace.

Snape was in two minds to tell Harry, or at least  his best friend - Lucius, and then they could tell the Alpha together.  The thing was, no one wanted to be on the receiving end of his anger, and this alone was what was stopping him.  He decided he had to tell someone, and went to see Dumbleodre later in the day.  He had told the man earlier that he would be coming by, to which the Headmaster had simply replied, "I knew you would".

Entering the office, he felt sudden warmth.  The fireplace was lit, which was funny.  Dumbledore was not a man who liked to sit by the fire, but he supposed now was a good time as any.  He made his way towards the man, and poured them each a cup of tea.  The tray was on the table, that the elves had placed their a moment ago.  Dumbledore took his cup with a shaky hand, and said thank you.

Snape tilted his head and stirring sugar into his own cup, sat down and stayed quiet for a while.  He would speak when he was ready, and there was no way that he was walking out of this office, before they had reached some sort of agreement.  End of story.

"Severus", came the shaky voice from the old man.  "I realize that I have asked too much of you, by asking you to keep this a secret from others.  I can see how it is eating at you, and you of all people don't deserve that.  And I want you to know that I am sorry that I could not save Lily, when you asked me to.  I am sorry that you had to go through that heart break alone, and I am especially sorry that I will not be here to see you reach your full potential".

Severus was shaking in his anger.  He tried to calm his breathing, and replied, "Headmaster, while I am glad that you brought this to my attention, it is true that I cannot carry it any alone any more.  I thought I could when I gave you my word, but the truth is, this is far too heavy a burden.  I see no reason why you would want to apologize for Lily, other than the fact that you have accepted your fate.  And I want to say this - while I am not an emotional man, I am however your friend.  And believe it or not, you have many friends Albus.  So, either you tell Harry or I will", he said, hoping that his words would sink in.

He didn't really want to set an ultimatum, but in his heart he knew he had to.  Harry would know what to do, and how to fix this.  Yes there was a time for everything, but could they please have just more time together.  Life was known to be cruel to Severus Snape, and he had accepted it, but fucking hell.  He wondered that if he got down on his knees and prayed to the gods, would they hear him.  Would they listen to what he had to say, to what he had to ask.  And then of course, there was the question of accepting what was being said, and denying it with all that was in him.

Dumbledore nodded and said, "I understand.  I expected nothing less from you than to come here and give me an ultimatum.  I am so proud of the man that you have become Severus, and I would be honored if you would call a meeting with Harry, so that the three of us could discuss what has to happen in the future", he said. 

Snape nodded and said he would do this.  They drank their tea in silence, and when it was time to leave, Snape sent a hurried owl to Harry Potter, saying that he had to see him urgently.  It could not wait.  The meeting to be held by the three of them, would have to happen soon, if not the very next day.

He went to bed that night with a lighter heart, and was glad that Dumbledore was being reasonable about this.  It had been a month since he had been told, and it had been long enough trying to keep it hidden away in the corners of his mind.  The truth needed to be told.

Dumbledore sat on his bed that night, grateful for a man like Severus Snape.  They had rescued each other many times, and he was enamored by his ability to get anything done, that was asked of him.  The first time that he had asked Severus for help, he had given it, no questions asked.  When he had told him that Lily's son needed protection, he had begged him not to tell a soul.  

"No one can know", he had demanded.  He was pretty sure that he was the only one that ever saw good in the man, and he knew that what he had asked wasn't fair and it wasn't right.  But now, it seemed that there was a way to right this wrong.  He would take it away from the potions master, and he would tell Harry and the others what exactly had happened to make his character seem strange to them.

He smiled at the thought that Harry Potter, a mere boy from a cupboard, could perhaps be his last saving grace.



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