Goodbye Doesn't Mean Forgetting

Goodbye Doesn't Mean Forgetting: Part 18

JJ's alarm had always been 'Wide Awake' by Katy Perry which was the most inappropriate song ever for an alarm because at six O'Clock in the morning, I wasn't exactly wide awake. JJ went straight in for a shower because typical JJ hadn't packed his things into his suitcase. Today was the day that Union J were going finding their room at the hotel in the centre of London. It was harder to get to London now, it cost much more and considering the hotel was on the other side of the city, I wouldn't be seeing JJ for quite a while. We had decided that because it would cost a lot of money to be at the shows, Otea and I would only go to a few. Instead, JJ's parents would attend as his support. I thought it best as I know how much it meant to his parents. Whilst JJ was in the shower, I went into Otea's room and woke her up. Quickly getting changed, we ran in to help JJ finish of packing. Slowly, JJ's belongings started to disapear from the room and I could feel the loss without him. We all made our way down into the hallway where we would be saying goodbye. I didn't know the other boys had arrived but I grabbed them all and hugged them so tightly. 

"Don't stress, don't panic, we'll always be here supporting you no matter what happens" I said.

JJ was stood with his mum and dad, talking and whispering again. The other boys were fussing over Otea. Then JJ grabbed me from behind my waist and kissed my cheek. 

"I'm gonna miss you gorgeous"

"I'm gonna miss you more"

I turned round and hugged him so tightly. I didn't want to let him go, if I could go with him, I willingly would.

"I promise to call you and skype you" He said.

"And you better had keep that promise" I added.

The car horn sounded outside the door. JJ pulled me closer to him and kissed me passionately, like it was out last kiss. I gave him one last hug and then he was gone. Off to live his dream.

After being stood at the front of the house waving goodbye, I beckoned Otea to go up stairs and get her dolls ready so we could play with them. It was then that JJ's mum called me into the kitchen. I walked in to see her holding a brown envelope, my name written across it.

"This came yesterday morning, I've been meaning to give it to you"

"Thanks Mrs H!" I said, taking the letter and running upstairs.

I placed the letter at my bedside and walked into Otea's room to see that she had all of her dolls, lay in a line waiting to be played with. I grabbed one doll and started to make it talk. We ended up playing a game where a young girl had lost her prince and she never thought she'd see him again until she met another princess and they were reunited. Does it sound familiar?. After playing with Otea, I took her out for some ice cream, made her some tea, helped her with her homework, watched the latest episode of Victorious and then put her to bed. I picked out one of her favorite books from her reading shelf and began to read it to her, by the time I had finished, she was sound asleep. I walked into my room, noticing the letter at the side of my bed. I picked it up, shoved it in my back pocket and headed back downstairs to make myself a cup of tea. Sitting at the table, I removed the letter from my back pocket, and began to open the envelope. Inside was a piece of white paper, with scribbled writing. I began to read.

"Dear Megan,

I don't know how you're going to feel when you read this, most likely shocked and very awkward, probably the way I felt now that I'm writing. I've missed so much in your life, you growing up, your friendships, your boyfriends and your graduations. I regret it with all my heart and if there is one thing I could change it would be to be part of your life again. It's weird sometimes, to think I have a daughter living near me who doesn't know who I am. I often wondered if you ever thought about me or if you ever wanted to see me. I'm guessing not. I just hope this reaches you in one peace and that you are happy wherever you may be. One thing I want to know is if you do receive this letter, will you reply?. I just wanted you to know I never stopped loving you or thinking about you. I hope to get a reply one day. Lots of love, Dad x"