Lamhaat - SidNaaz

Chapter Twelve.

'Life is fleeting. Yet, it stood still. It conquered and silenced. His lips touched my soul, and he had me naked in the palm of his hand, he caressed the cracks and filled the crevices. Yet, I cloaked myself with the indemnity of the concocted credence that I couldn't subdue my soul into his bewitching grasp, to consume me whole...'

"Kya kar rahi hai? Get up. Ghante hogaye hain aur tu ne khaaya nahi... Uth." Sidharth's voice startled her. She gasped, shutting the book and stowed it away under the pillow. Ten days. It had been ten days since they had spoken to each other fully. Somehow, after the conversation on the terrace, they found it hard to find the words to say to each other, Shehnaaz mostly. And he understood, as always. So when he kind of waddled into the room, whoozy and slurred, she felt like life pumped a strong gush of air into her lungs. But the diary, she had to hide it. With no phone or laptop, she was stuck with books and writing, and it was a good detox, except, she had shut herself out completely too.

"I... Uh.... Yes... What?" She stuttered, putting the blanket over the pillow to just conceal the little book she had been writing in better.

"Get up! You haven't eaten." Sidharth stressed.

"Yeah... Woh... Uhm.. bhook nahi hain. Tum khaa lo." She shook her head and laid down on the bed. Rangu was asleep on his own bed on floor.

"You ate breakfast at 9 in the morning... It's 5 almost now. You shouldn't stay hungry for so long." He sighed, sitting down on the bed next to her. The room smelled exceptionally too much like her.

"Haath dikhau." She mumbled. He simply laid back, and closed his eyes. He wanted to touch her, feel the comfort of her weight in his arms. But it had been a week, and they remained aloof, away from each other. She stayed cooped up in the room, and Sidharth in another one. Sometimes, when their souls felt weary, they would just sit on the terrace with no words spoke between them, just dwelling in each other's presence for comfort. So that's why, she felt like her stomach flipped a few miles when he laid in her bed.

"Kya hua?" She asked in a small voice. She could smell the slight pungent odor from the alcohol that he seemed to have taken in. He turned onto his side, moving his head into her lap. A soft whimper left her lips, his stubble poked into her calves through her leggings.

"Bhook lag rahi hain." He mumbled, snuggling into her thigh. She gulped, her hands were left awkwardly to her sides and she looked down at him, her chest rose and fell with anticipation.

"Khaaya nahi tumne?" She asked, looking down at his peaceful face in her lap.

"Nuhuh. Tu nahi aayi na." He whispered, licking his lips.

"Are you drunk?" She mumbled, reaching her hand out to run her fingers through his hair. It was so think and she tugged gently on it, making him moan softly.

"No. Just a glass. Just tipsy." He muttered, nuzzled her nose into his thigh.

"Why are we not talking, Shehnaaz?" He asked so softly.

"Kyunki mujhe darr lag raha hain." She whispered, cupping his face and bending over to kiss his forehead. Her heart pounded in her chest.

"Kis baat ka?"

"Dil tootne ke..."

"Aur?"

"Ki kahi inn sab mein... Tum na phas jaaye. Like.... Because of my relationship with Gurmeet, mai phas gayi... What if you get wrapped up in all this because of whatever it is that we have?" She mumbled, her voice cracking.

"Matlab?" He opened his eyes.

"What if they think that you're working with me because they think I'm working with the enemies?" She said. He chuckled, closing his eyes again.