Spiderman Oneshots

Sucklet

(A/N this came up as an ad before a video I was playing and I couldn't resist-)

It was the best day of Peter's life.

Had he been made an Avenger? Had Mr Stark called him in on a mission? Had he had a breakthrough with Karen?

No, he had $29.

"Anyone want to buy an autograph?" Spider-Man yelled at the people passing. "I'll do a flip for 20 cents!"

"Are you broke or something?" A teenage boy looked up at him. 

"No, I'm trying to save up for something very special."

"You're broke," the boy decided, and handed over a cent. "Found this on the floor."

"Thank you!" Peter called at his retreating back.

In the next hour, he did a triple backflip, three selfies and five autographs, and got his final 99 cents. 

"Thank you!" He yelled at the woman who'd made him do the triple backflip, and launched himself away.

"May?" He called into the apartment as he crawled through his window.

There was no reply. Perfect. 

that was when the dog ate him.

(okay ignore that bit I left my laptop unattended for 1 minute and my sibling found it D:)

There was no reply from May. Perfect.

Not even bothering to remove his suit, Peter yanked the mask off his head and sat down in front of his laptop. It was already open on the website he wanted. Peter grinned broadly and clicked order.

Three days passed, and Peter was buzzing with anticipation as he hurried home after school. 

"Hi May! How was your day?" He asked politely. 

"Alright, thank you. A parcel arrived today, do you know about it?"

"Yeah, I ordered something. Where is it?"

"I left it in the hall."

Without further ado, Peter took his parcel and locked himself in his bedroom. Slowly, almost religiously, he peeled back the tape and opened the flaps. Inside the box was the beauty he'd been waiting for his entire life.

Peter carefully lifted it into his arms, freeing it from its plastic prison, and threw away the receipt.

It was a sucklet, and he loved it.

There was a knock on the door and May stuck her head in. "Would you like Thai or - what is that?" She stared in horror, and Peter hugged his baby closer defensively.

"He's my new sucklet."

May blinked, and backed out of the room.

The next day, the news was fascinated by Spider-Man's new partner as he did his daily patrol - a fluffy white star plushy with dark glass eyes. When asked, all the vigilante would say was: "Sucklet is a friend of the mushrooms. I let him into my home, you should too."

"He's been possessed," JJJ decided.

But the public loved sucklet. By the end of the first day, Spider-Man had made $40 just from people asking for photos with him. By the end of the week, he had $135.

Peter got back online, and three days later another, larger, box arrived. May was stood in the hallway, deliberating whether or not to burn the demonic creatures before Peter got home, when Peter got home. 

He quickly rescued them to the haven of his room, where he opened the box containing two more sucklets in white and black, and one three times their size.

They all joined him on patrol the next day.

"Spider-Man has officially gone insane," JJJ announced.

The public didn't care.

Peter cried, but his sucklets were there to comfort him.

By the end of the next week, Peter had placed another order. And another. Soon he was carrying a net made of webbing all across the city, and occasionally deigned to lend a small sucklet to particularly traumatised victims he saved. Spider-Man was never seen without at least one furry star on his shoulder. 

By this point May was terrified of the strange beings that had invaded her home, but she couldn't tell anyone about the infestation without revealing her nephew's secret identity. So she suffered in silence, telling herself that as long as Peter was happy, she could find room for the sucklets that seemed to just keep coming.

Until one day, the small apartment exploded, and police could barely identify the bodies of the woman and her nephew that had once lived there amongst the thousands of furry white stars smiling innocently up at them.

The End.