Cold Devotion | ✔️

Chapter Twenty-Four

Rose

"It's late, you should get some rest," he removes his hand from mine and a sense of emptiness fills me. I know I can trust him, I can feel it with everything in me. The last thing I can think of is going to the facility with my father. I should probably call Zach and make sure everything is okay.

"The last thing I remember... I was in the car going to the facility," I try to rack my brain as Colton gets up and runs a hand over his face. "How... how long ago was that?" I whisper and he stays with his back facing me.

"Just over a month ago," he says quietly and I hear his voice catch before he quickly leaves the room. A month? A month of my life simply gone. Vanished into nothing.

I wanted him to stay, to tell me everything that I had missed. A hollow feeling in my chest, distracts me from it all. I feel grief and pain but I don't know what for... who for.

The doctor comes in and takes the herbs from me before soaking them in hot water for me to drink. It smells foul but I can't live without remembering a month of my life. I remember the man saying that he didn't know if it worked but I am willing to try anything.

She hands me the cup and I take a sip, the taste is almost as sickening as the smell. I quickly drink it and hand her back the cup. She smiles softly and leaves the room.

I close my eyes, trying to welcome sleep. But I feel as though I have been asleep for the better part of my whole life, I am wide awake and my body is showing no signs of wanting to fall into slumber. Everything is moving a million miles per hour in my head, so many things but nothing all at once.

It's odd... to feel everything but nothing at all.

It's a feeling that I wouldn't wish upon anyone... not even my worst enemy. I don't feel like myself, it feels like something has changed in me.

Deep within me.

***

It's been a fair amount of days since everything has happened and I am still just as clueless as I was then. I keep drinking the tea, trying to trick my mind into remembering. I know that it's not doing anything, I figured that out on the third day. But I am more desperate than I have ever been in my entire life.

All I want is to just remember - nothing more, nothing less.

Colton has came to see me a few times but he had only stayed for a short while. I could see that it was draining him - coming in here and seeing me no closer to remembering him.

My dreams are vivid and keep repeating themselves. They're strange. I've had dreams of killing people and being in war. I'm not sure if it's the medication or what but I feel like I am going crazy.

Colton walks in, speaking of the devil.

"How are you?" he asks and sits down in the chair beside the bed. He looks as though he hasn't slept properly in days, much like myself in that department.

"I just want to get out of here," I sigh and he runs a hand through his hair. "Anything memorable happen?" I say and then laugh at the irony of what I just said.

"You can't leave... not until your memories are restored," he says and it makes me want to pull my own hair out. I am so sick of everyone expecting me to remember, its quite clearly not working. I stare at the IV in my hand and start trying to get it out. I've had enough of this.

"You know that's not going to happen Colton," my voice breaks and tears prick my eyes from frustration. Frustration at myself, the world, the people who did this to me. I rip the IV out and Colton places a firm hand over mine.